A friend recently posted on Facebook, “When is the right time to tell my kids about Santa?” She has two children under ten. Almost every person who responded said not to tell any child EVER that there is no Santa. Unless your child is about to be embarrassed by peers because he/she still believes in Santa, I agree.
What is more magical than waiting for Santa to arrive on Christmas Eve and then getting up to see what he left on Christmas Day?
Most kids figure it out before 10 or 11. I figured it out in 1976, at age 9, and though I thought I wanted to know, I really didn’t. Once the magic of Santa is gone, part of childhood is over. I know…Christmas isn’t all about the gifts, but kids sure like the gifts.
I remember sitting in my fourth grade classroom at Spanish Fort Elementary School, talking with friends about Santa. Most of us still believed Santa flew around the world in a magic sleigh with reindeer and went down every child’s chimney in one night. We were a sheltered bunch. Oh, I was a firm believer, but someone must have created some doubt along the way, because, well, just read on…
About a month before Christmas 1976, my mother couldn’t find her car keys. She was searching all over the house, and in desperation, she asked me to go out to the car and see if they were in the glove compartment. When I opened the glove compartment, of course, there were no keys, but I did find an address book and diary that would be perfect gifts for a girl my age. I didn’t take them inside and ask Mother about them. Instead, I left them where I found them…as a test. My thinking? If Mother and Daddy gave them to me for Christmas, then Santa was alive and well. BUT…If Santa brought them on Christmas Day, then I would know he wasn’t real. So, I left them and waited for Christmas.
I have a picture of me from that Christmas morning, sitting on the sofa in our den, wearing my yellow nightgown with the number 12 on the front (Joe Namath’s number) and looking less than thrilled. Oh, I was thrilled with my gifts…a 110 camera with plenty of film and flashcubes (remember those?), a telescope, Yahtzee, some 45 records (KC and the Sunshine Band, Rick Dees singing Disco Duck, The Eagles), some clothes, some books, and yes…the diary and address book. The magic was over. I knew Santa didn’t exist. My heart was broken. But I didn’t tell anyone. I just sucked it up and enjoyed the day, but Christmas morning was never the same.
But that brings us back to the original question: when is the right time to tell kids about Santa Claus? Most people would say never, and I tend to agree. I never told my own daughter, but she figured it out eventually. When she was 10, she still believed. I remember, because she came down with the flu in the middle of the afternoon on Christmas Eve, and she was up sick all night. I had the hardest time figuring out when I would play Santa that night. Thank God I had wrapped all the gifts in advance. (She had asked Santa several years before to wrap her gifts instead of just leaving them out in the living room.) But by the next year, when she was 11, my daughter no longer believed in Santa Claus. She now tells me someone at school told her. And Christmas has never been as much fun.
But there is an exception to the “don’t tell” rule: your 13-yr-old child is about to do presentation to his 8th grade class about Santa Claus. You have to save him from himself. You have to tell him.
Finding out the truth about Santa can’t possibly be fun for any child. But there is something that’s more fun than believing in Santa: being Santa. Until I had a child, I had no idea that Christmas morning is a lot more fun as a parent than it ever was as a child. Sure, a lot of work goes into making it “perfect,” but seeing the excitement of Santa’s arrival on Christmas Eve and the pure joy on our daughter’s face on Christmas morning were better than I could have ever dreamed it would be. Even now, when I know she knows Santa isn’t “real,” it’s fun to see her excitement as she opens her gifts.
I will be playing Santa till I can’t play Santa anymore.
My 10 year old, Hudson, asked me if Santa was real about two months ago. I told him the truth and he looked so sad. Ever since then, he has asked me if I was telling him the truth or joking. My reply since then has been, “Maybe I was just kidding. You never know…” I wish I had not told him! 😪
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Missy, I get it. It’s so sad to find out. Years ago…I have no idea how old she was…Milly asked me about the elves. When I would answer that they are real, she would say, “Mom! Really?! Tell me the truth!” After about 30 times, I told her the truth, and she started crying hysterically! I quickly backtracked and said, “Oh honey, I was just trying to get you to stop asking me! Of course they’re real.” She immediately stopped crying and started smiling like her heart was aglow, saying, “I KNEW they were real!” So sad and so sweet!
I honestly don’t remember when I knew there wasn’t a Santa or who told me. I have an older brother so it was probably him. I’m sure it’s harder for parents with kids around the same age especially when one stops believing and the other still does. My boyfriend’s son will probably tell his sister who is 4 years younger that there isn’t one because that’s the type of kid he is.
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Lol! You are so funny…”that’s the type of kid he is.” I’m 17 months older than my brother, but I didn’t tell him. He might have known before I did!😂