Category / sorority

by Kelly Mattei

Sorority Recruitment (Rush) Preparation in the South

Sorority recruitment (rush) preparation in the south.

Planning to participate in recruitment at a big, southern school? Don’t fret. Yes, recruitment is a big deal at big, southern schools, and it can be intimidating, but there’s a method to the madness. I hear lots of high school seniors and their moms talking about it every year, so I’m going to give a few suggestions. I don’t claim to know everything, but I do know it is likely to go more smoothly if you do your homework and prepare. I am a mom who joined a sorority at a big, southern school in the 80s, and I have a daughter in a sorority at a big, southern school now. I have lots of friends who have daughters in sororities at big, southern schools. That’s my background, so glean what you will from the information below.

I am not a rush consultant or coach.

Every year, I hear about people from different parts of the country who send their daughters to southern schools, and they are surprised at how popular and stressful sorority recruitment is in this part of the country. That’s why I say “do your homework.” If I had been sending my daughter to college in Michigan or California, I would have expected a different rush experience for her, and we would have had to do a lot of homework to see how it goes there. I, likely, would have started doing my homework as soon as she knew where she was going to school, but here is some information that might help if you don’t know how to deal with recruitment in the south. All the information might not apply to every southern college or university, but hopefully, you will find the information helpful.

How to prepare for recruitment in the south? It’s important that moms help. No, don’t do all the legwork, but be there to remind your daughter about deadlines and to edit/proofread the resumé. Preparation can depend on the school, but generally speaking, here are some things you can do:

  • Update your social resumé. This is a good starting point, because you will need to give a social resumé to women who write recommendations for you (more on that below). There are different apps for creating a social resumé. My daughter used the Canva app. You can look for sample resumés online. Don’t panic if you see ads for “rush packets.” For most alumnae who will be writing recommendations, those packets are not only not necessary, but they’re also not wanted. A resumé plus a headshot will be all you need, in most cases. I haven’t talked to any alumnae or rush chairmen/advisors in the past five years who have wanted packets. For recruitment, make sure your social resumé includes:
    • your full name,
    • the name you actually use…example: legal name is Elizabeth, but you go by Betsy
    • your home address/phone number/email address
    • your parents’ names/colleges/Greek affiliations
    • your standardized test scores/GPA/class rank (if your school ranks)
    • your extracurricular activities/honors/leadership positions
    • work experience/community service/interests
    • other family Greek affiliations.
    • Lots of girls, like my daughter and all her friends, also include a photo on the resumé.
  • Register for recruitment. Do not miss the deadline. Read all the information. Know the cost of joining and being a member of a sorority. At some schools, it’s a few hundred dollars a year. At some larger schools with big sorority houses, it can be between $7,000 and $10,000 per year. Do your homework! At my daughter’s university, the student and the parents sign a contract saying they understand the cost. It is important to know this…and keep in mind the costs they post don’t include the dresses she’ll need for formals/parties, the t-shirts she will get afterward, pictures, and more! It is unfair to the student and to the chapter to join if you cannot afford it. ***See bottom of page for some southern schools’ recruitment info/guides.***
  • Follow the Panhellenic Instagram and the Instagram accounts of all the sororities at the college or university you will be attending. This is a way of showing interest in the sororities, and it’s a great way for you to learn more about each chapter. You actually can learn a lot about the feel of a chapter by its posts, just like you can learn something about a person from his/her posts on social media. And that leads me to…
  • Clean up social media. Southern sororities rely heavily on social media these days to get a bigger picture of the potential new member. If you’re planning to participate, go through the photos/posts on your social media accounts, including Facebook, Instagram, and Tiktok. If there are risqué outfits or alcohol in your photos, remove those photos. If there are risqué outfits or dances in your Tiktok videos, remove them. You don’t have to look like you don’t have any fun, but you want your social media to be a clean representation of who you are. Sororities want to get a bigger picture of who you are and what you enjoy. *Sororities at some schools like for potential new members to have public Instagram accounts, so they can get to know you better.*
  • Make and submit video, if required. *Some schools require potential new members to submit a video.* If you are required to submit a video before recruitment, you want your personality to shine through, but you also want it to be the best representation of you. You don’t want to be in a swimsuit or too casually dressed. You want to look your best.This is your first impression moment! There will be guidelines to follow. They often ask for a background that is not distracting, and you need to have good lighting that highlights you and not the area around you. Speak clearly and answer the prompts. My daughter had to pick three prompts from six or eight. I recommend having a loose script or some highlights to cover when making your video…or even a big cue card hanging on the wall. Be memorable…in a good way. And remember…a smile is your best accessory! *If the video is optional, do it.* ***Also, I recommend using a tripod to hold the camera and a Ring light for best facial lighting.***
  • Get recommendations from sorority alumni. If at all possible, get recommendations from sorority alumnae. Moms can ask on Facebook if they have friends who are sorority alumnae who are willing to write recommendations. Some sororities do not require/accept recommendations, but some require them. For big, southern schools, it’s a good idea to have at least one to each house, if possible. Lots of people believe you need to give alumnae “packets” containing a letter, your resume, and a headshot. That’s old school. Most sororities accept (and prefer) recommendations online now, so most alumnae do not want packets. I do not want packets; they are the bane of my existence. I always ask girls to send me a resumé and photo online, and I include that with my online recommendation. The recommendations are actually done with online forms through a sorority’s national website. They are not personally-written letters. They are forms, but alumnae can add comment to the forms. Recommendations do not guarantee anything. They are simply a “formal” introduction from an alumna to a chapter.
  • Make connections. Different schools have different rules about contact before recruitment. My daughter’s school has very strict rules regarding contact between potential new members and sorority members. Other schools allow contact right up until the start of recruitment. You can usually find the rules on the school’s Panhellenic website. Get the word out to friends and family that you will be participating in recruitment. You never know who might know a sorority member at a school. ***If you’re going to a larger southern school, you might need to set your Instagram account to “public” until rush is over. It’s a way for the girls in sororities to get to know you better.***
  • Start preparing your “rush bag.” I have a whole post about rush bags and what goes into them. “Rush bags” are handbags for potential new members to carry with them during the recruitment process. They contain necessities for hot days, rainy days, and wardrobe emergencies. My post even has links to lots of the needed items, so it makes your shopping easier. See it here.
  • Start thinking about wardrobe, including shoes. Most southern schools have published information about 2023 recruitment, or they will soon. Read it, and learn what you’ll need to wear for each day. At my daughter’s school, the first round is watching videos of the chapters. The girls are issued t-shirts to wear for the second round; they wear them with cute shorts or skorts/skirts…and I don’t mean “booty” shorts. Cute dressier shorts or a skirt will be perfect. They need dresses for the next round, and they need a dress for the preference round, but all of that is different at different schools! Keep that in mind! Do your homework! Make sure you have an extra dress or two, in case of spills or if you need options, Obviously, different schools have different styles…even across the south. What is popular at Baylor might not work at SMU or South Carolina. What works at Georgia might not work at TCU or Florida State. Look at sorority Instagrams. Look at the Instagram accounts of girls who go there; you will likely see some pictures that will help. Don’t wear anything skimpy or too tight. Fitted is fine; too tight is a no-no. Last year, for our daughter going to Bama, we looked at Zara and Amanda Uprichard. There are some cute Amanda Uprichard styles on Amazon. For shoes, our daughter took nice sneakers for the first two days and comfortable low-heeled, nude-colored wedges for other days, except a dressier pair of shoes for Preference Day. The goal is to wear tasteful, flattering dresses that are comfortable. You don’t want to be fidgeting with your clothes, and if you aren’t comfortable, it will show. ***Also, some chapters require girls to have simple white dresses for formal pledging soon after Bid Day. It’s a good idea to have one on hand, just in case! They often go on sale after July 4 at lots of stores. Simple, modest, not low-cut, covered shoulders preferred. My daughter wore the white romper below, and no one was the wiser.***Here are a few simple styles I saw on some girls during recruitment last year. But keep in mind, you need to get what’s right for YOU and what’s right for the climate and vibe at the school you are attending:

Amanda Uprichard Allora Dress, some colors offered at $85 at time of writing. Several colors available here.

Amanda Uprichard Fiori Dress, some sizes offered at $93 at time of writing. Purchase here.

Amanda Uprichard Josephine Dress, $198. Purchase here. Purchase here.

Amanda Uprichard Marsha Romper, X-small $175 here. Other sizes $202 here.

*This is a romper simply because it has shorts built in underneath, but it does not show as a romper. It looks like a dress.*

Steve Madden Apparel Kianna Dress, $89. Click here.

These are a few things you can do to get prepared for the experience ahead of recruitment. It’s something most people will experience only once in their lives. Be prepared.

Recruitment can be a lot of fun. Be yourself, and be open-minded. Those are the two most important things. You got this!

***If you have suggestions you would like to add to the above, please leave a comment!***

University of Alabama Greek Chic 2025 Recruitment Guide

University of Florida 2025 Recruitment Info

University of Mississippi Recruitment Guide 2025

University of Georgia Recruitment Info

University of North Carolina

University of South Carolina Sorority Recruitment info

Mississippi State University Recruitment

University of Arkansas Recruitment Info

Auburn University Recruitment Info

University of Tennessee Recruitment Info

Louisiana State University Greek Life Info

by Kelly Mattei

Easter Basket Stuffers

Easter basket stuffers.

It’s not too late! If you’re just now trying to figure out Easter Basket stuffers, you’re in good company: me. I just finally ordered Easter stuff today. Yes, I still put together an Easter basket for our 19-yr-old daughter and one of her friends every year. For years, our daughter’s friend has spent the night at our house the night before Easter, and every year, the bunny brings them baskets. Even though they are college freshmen this year, they will still get baskets. In fact, as long as I am able to do it, they will get baskets from our Easter Bunny.

Try to shop local whenever possible! I have purchased some items from local boutiques in Charlotte like Paper Skyscraper, The Buttercup, and more. The Buttercup has some great Easter items for younger children. They are located at 1035 Providence Road in Charlotte, and Paper Skyscraper is on East Boulevard.

Target also has some good Easter basket offerings, but they’re getting pretty picked over by now I haven’t had the opportunity to go there, so I sat down and started ordering online.

Today, I ordered a couple of baskets in the girls’ sorority colors. They are in the same sorority at different schools, so those baskets will match! I ordered them from Amazon, and they are actually baskets for “gamers,” but I thought they could actually use the baskets in their rooms, because they don’t really look like Easter baskets. See the Easter baskets offered by Amazon here. You can see and purchase the one I purchased here.

And then I went straight to Easter basket stuffers. I purchased Easter candy at my local Walgreens, but I wanted to get the girls some things they could actually use. Even though a garden gnome seems like a strange Easter Basket stuffer, I got them each one, simply because I got them gnomes a couple of years ago. Purchase the one I purchased here. And see Amazon’s other gnome selections here.

Since they are both first-year Kappa Kappa Gammas, I thought it would be fun to incorporate that into their basket items too.
They love sweatshirts, and I found some cute sorority Comfort Colors sweatshirts. I needed them to arrive in time for Easter, so the pickings were slim, but I found these. To find similar ones for your daughter’s sorority on Amazon, click here. Just be careful to be sure whatever you order will arrive in time for Easter if you want to include it in the basket.

Additionally, I got them some Jojowell Shower Steamers that come 21 to a package in seven different scents. Each package is less that $25, and these steamers can make a shower feel like a spa! They come complete with two mesh bags and two suction cups for hanging the steamers in the shower. To purchase them, click here.

What else are they getting? How about some matching pajamas in their sorority colors? Yes! They get very excited about PJs every year, so they will be expecting some kind of pajamas, but the sorority colors will be a surprise! See the ones I purchased here. To see other cute PJ options on Amazon, click here. Or purchase some at your favorite boutique or retailer.

Because they loved Nickelodeon, specifically the show, iCarly, I got them both some XL iCarly t-shirts. They’ll laugh, and honestly, they’re likely to use them as pajamas sometimes. Last year, I gave them some iCarly Kooky pens, so this will carry on that theme. You can see the Amazon’s selection of iCarly t-shirts here. There are t-shirts for various Nickelodeon shows on Amazon here.

I also got them some acrylic glasses they can use in their dorms or in next year’s apartments or sorority houses. They can never have too many plastic or acrylic cups that they don’t have to worry about breaking. See the large selection on Amazon here.

And don’t forget the plastic Easter eggs! Sure, you can get the standard plastic Easter eggs, or you can get some that are especially cute from Amazon! I found some that I will fill with chocolates and other candies, because what’s an Easter basket without colorful Easter eggs?!? See the cute ones I purchased here. Or if you’d like something different than what I bought, you can see a huge selection here.

I know some of you might have younger children, so your Easter basket stuffers will likely be different than what I’m getting. If you have younger children, there is a whole section on Amazon that’s just for basket stuffers of all shapes and sizes. You can see them here.

But order right away! You don’t want to be left with an empty basket on Easter morning!

by Kelly Mattei

First College Parents’ Weekend in the Books

First college parents’ weekend in the books.

My husband and I got home last night after a whirlwind Parents’ Weekend with our freshman daughter at my college alma mater. Whew! We were exhausted when we got home, but we remarked several times that it was totally worth it to get to meet all her college friends and their parents…all in one place. At her university, there is a parents’ weekend in the fall, during football season, for all parents of children at the university, and in the spring, sororities and fraternities have their own parents’ weekends…usually spread out over February and March. We didn’t go to the all-school parents’ weekend. It’s just way too crowded, and I feel like it would be a little like going to Target on a Saturday, meaning all those people who aren’t normally there don’t know their way around and just create chaos for those of us who do know our way around! Therefore, we just did the sorority parents’ weekend. I have friends whose sons and daughters are in different fraternities and sororities, so I had heard how awesome these events are, but this weekend, my husband and I got to experience it for ourselves.

We were a little tired going into the weekend, because we scheduled poorly. We arrived home from a Bahamas vacation late Thursday night and had to get up Friday morning to go to Tuscaloosa. We opted to drive there this time, because we had some things to take with us. It’s not a short drive…about seven hours…but we loaded up the car and took off, caffeine in hand.

Honestly, I don’t remember even having a parents’ weekend when I was in school! Maybe we had it? It seems like we had something like a parents’ brunch, but I don’t think it was like the parents’ weekends they host these days. I don’t know. Maybe I just don’t remember correctly. I can tell you this: it’s certainly a big deal now. There were activities all weekend! Parties, parties, and more parties! We loved it, and we are grateful for the opportunity to get to know lots of people in our daughter’s life…and have lots of fun too! Sororities at Alabama have over 400 members each, so imagine how big these parties were! If 400 girls attend and bring two parents (some bring one, and some bring step parents), you’re looking at potentially 1200 people or more! It’s insane, but it was well-organized.

Mostly, it was fun to see our daughter in her element. She is a freshman, so this was our first sorority parents’ weekend experience. The best part of the whole thing was seeing how happy she is and how much she loves her friends. I watched her talking and laughing with her friends and thought, “Some of these girls will be her friends forever.” I know that, because I still have lots of my friends from my sorority days 30+ years ago. Yes, we actually stay in touch. We actually get together. We talk on the phone and follow each other on social media.

A couple of years ago, we were having drinks out on the patio with our next door neighbors, whose daughter went to the University of Alabama too. Our daughter was out there with us, and we were wondering aloud where she would go to college. I threw out some of my favorite college memories, and our neighbor talked about what a great time her daughter, Payton, had at Alabama. In fact, at one point, she exclaimed, “Payton’s four years at Alabama were the best four years of my life!” We all laughed, because when she started the statement, we expected her to say they were the best four years of Payton’s life, but she even enjoyed it as a mom!

After being there this weekend, I see why, and I feel sure that, if all goes according to plan, our daughter will enjoy her college years as much as, or even more than, I did. It’s hard to believe anyone could enjoy it more than I did. I often say I have had three childhoods: my real childhood, my college years, and my daughter’s childhood (because I got to relive all those joyous, fun moments). I took full advantage of the fun, no doubt. I certainly hope she makes as many wonderful, hilarious memories as I did in the 1980s!

If you haven’t experienced parents’ weekend with your child at college, I hope you will go into it knowing it can be an absolutely enriching experience, and you are likely to make some fun memories. Is there anything more heartwarming and fulfilling than seeing your child happy and loved? That’s what we felt this past weekend. We felt the love and happiness she is experiencing, and we came home happy (and exhausted).