Parents’ School Year Goals?

Looking through “the Facebook” today, I came across a friend’s post asking, “Parents, what are your goals for this school year?”

Am I supposed to have school year goals? I’d never considered it, but maybe I’ve been missing out on something. Maybe, while teachers and students are setting goals for the new school year, I should be setting some goals of my own. I’ve asked other friends, and they looked at me like I had fourteen eyes. One of them said she has one goal: drink more wine. Another one said her goal is to keep her children organized for the school year. I told her, “Good luck with that.” I’m not a terribly organized person, so personally, I’d probably hurt my daughter’s organizational skills rather than helping them.

So, after talking with friends, I decided to make my own list of goals for the school year, and they are goals for me, not my daughter:

  • Family time. My first goal is to make sure we carve out some family time. Between school sports, school, real life, and social lives, this can get neglected. This school year, I will make it a priority…to make sure we have time to just be together…maybe dinnertime, maybe watching sports together, maybe vacations…whatever…I will make it happen.
  • Have fun. This is always at the top of my list. No matter what we are doing, we can make it fun. That doesn’t mean we don’t take things seriously; it means we approach it with joy. I’ll use my library volunteer job as an example. I volunteer every other Tuesday, and the job entails checking out books for students, shelving, reloading paper in printers, etc. Sounds boring, right? And I’m sure it can be, but it has always been fun for me. I look forward to it every time, because I became friends with the people who work there, and it’s always fun to spend time with friends. There’s nothing wrong with sharing jokes or life stories while you work! I try to become friends with people in my volunteer positions, so it feels like I’m hanging out with friends while we’re working.
  • Enjoy lunch with friend(s) at least once a week, and once a month, I need to try a restaurant in town I’ve never visited. My friend, Linda, and I meet regularly, and we tend to meet at the same four or five places. Next time, we are going to a new place, and I’ve found the perfect place for us to try. It’s easy to keep going to the same places, and I won’t abandon those, but if I try a new restaurant once a month, that’s twelve new lunch places in a year!
  • Laugh a lot…a whole lot. At the risk of sounding like a song from Mary Poppins, I love to laugh! Really…it’s one of my favorite things to do. I grew up with a brother who loves to laugh and naturally makes people laugh, so I’ve had a lot of laughing practice. It cures a lot of ills. Therefore, I’m going to try to keep myself out of non-laughing situations.
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  • Spend time outdoors…all year. I love being outdoors. I love sunshine. I don’t love camping, so don’t get any ideas about that. In spring, summer, and fall, this doesn’t take much effort. But winter? That’s another story. It’s exactly when I need to get outdoors…to avoid SAD, Seasonal Affective Disorder…or what I call the wintertime blues. So this year, I am going to try to spend some time outdoors even when it’s cold. Brrrr.
  • Make some new friends. We have some new families coming to our school this year, and I plan to welcome them with open arms. You never know where you’ll find a friend…and I love fun, new friends…especially ones who like to try new restaurants and laugh a lot.
  • Travel when we can. High school means lots more time spent on homework, and it means lots more time dedicated to school sports. Whenever we can squeeze in some travel fun, we will do exactly that.
  • Exercise more. OK, I had to throw in one of those things that is a “must do.” I need to exercise more, so I added it to the list. If I can find people who want to laugh with me while exercising, that’s even better!
  • Watch more football. Yes, I’m putting it on the list. I watch a lot of football anyway, but I want to watch more. Don’t worry, Bama fans, because I am Schleprock, I will not watch Bama games in real time. I will record them and watch them after the fact. But I want to watch other games…a lot. Besides, this is a good way to fulfill the first goal I listed…spending time with family. How many more days till football season starts?

And those, my friends, are my back-to-school goals…nothing education-related at all. Sure, I could make my goals all about my child, who is now a high school student, but guess what…school is her job. Yes, if she asks me for help or I think she’s having issues, I will help her, of course. She knows that. But she also knows it is her responsibility to take care of school work. After all, I’ve already done 9th grade. It’s a lot more difficult than when I was in school, but she knows I will help her if she needs it, and she knows if I can’t help her, I will help her find someone who can. The one school-related thing I will do is continue to encourage her to establish relationships with her teachers…they can definitely help her if she needs help.

Let’s get this party started!

My Favorite Social Experiment

The American South and Midwest have reputations as friendly places, while the West and Northeast have reputations of being less so. On another note, people in the West are perceived as creative, and people in the Northeast are perceived as less inhibited. A 2013 study by the University of Cambridge supports that. You can see the results of the study here. After reading that today, I started thinking about our own little social experiment we conducted in Beverly Hills a few years ago.

Southern California: beautiful weather, beautiful people, good food, creativity, and good people-watching. My daugher and I love to go. We’ve been, as my mother used to say, “umpteen times.” That means we’ve been a lot. Today, we are embarking on another adventure to the Los Angeles area. We love visiting. Is it different than other parts of the country? Yes, and that’s part of what we love. Different parts of the country have different cultures and different attitudes, and that’s a good thing. How boring would our country be if there weren’t differences? Why bother visiting another place if that’s the case?

We love visiting the LA area, but would we want to live there? The bloom might fall right off the rose if we lived there. I’ve had to explain to my daughter on more than one occasion that living there isn’t the same as visiting. If you live there, real life gets in the way. Plus, you don’t live in a hotel with fantastic room service, and really, that’s part of the charm.

The first time I took her to LA, we were standing in line at a coffee shop, and my then 7-yr-old daughter looked up and said, “I want to live here, Mom.” The lady behind us heard her and leaned up to say, “Oh, honey. You don’t want to live here. People aren’t nice here like they are where you’re from.” Maybe she heard the southern accent? I had to take a few minutes after we sat down to explain that there are lots of nice people in LA, but I thought the lady meant they don’t wave to everybody and speak to everyone on sidewalks like we often do.

My friend, Mary Ann, who lives in Mobile, Alabama, and her son went with us on our next trip to the area. One day, as we were walking to breakfast at a restaurant about a mile from our hotel, we decided to conduct a social experiment by saying “good morning” to everyone we met on the sidewalk. We got all sorts of responses. Some people gave us sideways glances and moved farther away on the sidewalk, clutching their bags more tightly as if they thought we were trying to mug them. Others ignored us altogether. But there were three who were thrilled. One said how refreshing it was. Another hugged us and thanked us. And yet another had an entire conversation with us, starting with, “You’re not from around here, are you?”

We felt pretty sure we would get different results in the South.

We came home to Charlotte and tried the same Good Morning Experiment at our local Neiman Marcus, thinking the socioeconomics would be closest to Beverly Hills. About two weeks after the initial “experiment,” my daughter and I strolled through Neiman’s, and I greeted everyone we encountered with “Good morning!” My daughter didn’t even notice, because I do it all the time. Here’s what happened: no one looked at me like I was going to mug them. Every single person smiled, and most responded with a pleasant “good morning” in return. One had two gifts in her hand for her young daughter and stopped my daughter to ask which one was better for a young girl. Two or three complimented my shoes. And not one person looked at me like I was strange for greeting them.

I considered trying it in my favorite Target store in Charlotte but realized it wasn’t necessary. I speak to everyone in there every time I go anyway. I’ve even made friends in Target!

On our next visit to LA, we were with friends from the Northeast. We hadn’t discussed the social experiment. We were having breakfast in a restaurant one morning when a gentleman walked past our table on his way to the deli case and smiled. I smiled back and kept talking. When he passed again, he smiled again. I smiled and gave a little wave…it’s what I do. Apparently, he walked past two more times, and I smiled back without even realizing it. As we were leaving, he stopped me at the door. He told me he and his wife were dining in the back of the restaurant and decided to see how many people smiled back when he walked to the deli case. He said, “I smiled at every person at every table I passed, and you were the only one who smiled back. Not only did you smile every time, you waved!” I told him about our previous social experiment, and we all had a good laugh.

I’m not saying I’m always friendly and in a happy mood, and everybody in Charlotte isn’t always friendly either. The “results” of our “experiments” were interesting, though.

That’s not to say there aren’t friendly people in LA. I know some fabulous, friendly people who live there, and I hope to see them when we are there this time. Every time we go, we meet delightful people…every time…LOTS of great people. We’ve met people who treated us like old friends or family. We’ve met people who have welcomed us to their city with open arms…lots of fantastic people.

I can hardly wait to introduce our “newbies” to the places and people we love, and I’m looking forward to spending time with this fun group. We won’t be the most beautiful, skinniest, or most wealthy people in the city, but we can try to be the happiest and most friendly!

Maybe we will conduct another social experiment of some kind on this trip. Ideas?

An Old Friend and a Cute Waiter

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Presidents’ Day is behind us for 2018. It’s a long weekend that usually isn’t too memorable. In 2013, it was memorable. My friend, Angela, and her daughter came from Montgomery, Alabama, to visit us in Charlotte. Her daughter was ten at the time, and mine was nine. We wanted to have fun with them but also have plenty of time to chat. It turned out to be an awesome weekend, and we still talk about it.

Before they came up, Angela and I planned things over the phone. My daughter loves Great Wolf Lodge in Concord, NC (if you have kids, you need to check it out, click here), but Angela’s daughter had never been. We decided that would be our first stop. After numerous visits, I realized it’s a great place for kids to play while parents relax. *More info about Great Wolf Lodge at bottom of page*

They arrived on the Friday of Presidents’ Day weekend, and we drove up to Great Wolf Lodge, where the water park is indoors, and it’s always a balmy 84 degrees. Angela and I have been friends since college, more than 30 years. Our favorite activity is catching up and laughing about old times. So we did. The girls had fun in the water park.

After a night or two in the warm temperatures of Great Wolf Lodge, we drove from Concord, to Boone, NC, to enjoy some snow tubing. What a weather change it was! On our way to Boone, we encountered what we, two Alabama girls, called a “blizzard”!
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When we arrived at our hotel in Boone, temperatures were in the single digits. We had a reservation for snow tubing the next day at one of the local places.

The next morning, we got up, planning to go tubing, but when we called to reconfirm, they had halted operations due to high winds. We decided to visit some shops in downtown Boone and get some extra gear, since it was colder than expected.

When we all got hungry, we stepped into Macado’s, a casual restaurant in downtown Boone (for info on Macado’s, click here). It was staffed by college students from Appalachian State University, and one of the waiters took us to a table. He came back a little later and introduced himself as Ricky (I remember names really well), stumbling over his words a little. He then apologized, saying, “I’m sorry. I’m a little off my game today. I had a car accident on the way to work, and to top it off, I have a date tonight with a girl who’s way out of my league.” It broke the ice; we chuckled and of course, sympathized with him.

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He turned out to be very sweet and attentive. The girls ordered straight from the kids menu. Mine is a picky eater, so she ordered a peanut butter and jelly sandwich and french fries. Ricky asked, “Want me to cut off the crust?” My daughter’s face lit up, “Yes!” He won the moms’ hearts with his car accident/out-of-my-league-girl quip, and he had just won the girls’ hearts with that question. Their faces lit up again when he delivered their hot chocolate “with extra whipped cream and marshmallows” he said he made specially for them. I don’t even remember what Angela and I ordered, but we were happy.

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We enjoyed our meal and shelter from the cold for a while. I called another snow tubing location (Sugar Mountain Resort, for info, click here) and found out they were open, so we decided to get moving. Ricky brought the bill. Angela and I discussed it and decided to try to turn his day around. We left him a fat tip…hoping he’d be able to take out-of-his-league-girl on an impressive date. And then, we left, thanking him on our way out the door.

Stepping back into the frigid temps was a shock to the system, even in all the gear we were wearing, but we were on a mission to go tubing. The wind stung my face and made my eyes water. We were about a block from the restaurant when we heard someone calling behind us, “Ma’am! Ma’am!” We turned around to see Ricky, wearing his uniform and no coat, chasing us…in single-digit temperatures and strong wind! I thought for a second I must have left my credit card behind. Then, I heard him calling, “Thank you! Thank you so much for the great tip!” Oh my! So sweet. I yelled through the wind while waving for him to go back to the restaurant, “Our pleasure! Go back inside! We hope you have fun on your date tonight!” He smiled, waved, and ran back to the warmth of the restaurant.

We walked to our car, smiling. He made our girls happy with special crustless PB&Js. He made us, two middle-aged moms, happy by being so sweet to our girls. We made his day a little better with a generous tip.

IMG_0172We had a great time tubing that afternoon. The girls had a blast. Angela fell and bruised her knee. I almost got thrown out of the tubing park for not braking soon enough on the run when I was racing Angela. (There was no way I was going to let her win.) Over the loudspeaker, “Ma’am, this is your warning. If you cross the black line again, you will be removed from the park.” Eek! Good times!

Angela and I relive that weekend when we talk about old times now. We will never know what happened to Ricky. It has been five years, so I’m guessing he has graduated from App State by now. Most importantly, I hope the out-of-his-league-girl realized how awesome he was when they went out that night.

Chances are, Ricky was way out of her league.

 

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Cheers to Ricky and all the hard-working college students like him!

 

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**Great Wolf Lodge, Concord, NC, is a hotel/indoor water park and much more. The whole place is geared toward families, with activities, restaurants, swimming pools, an arcade, a bowling alley, Magiquest, shops with fun souvenirs, and special activities during holidays. If you haven’t been, it’s a great place to spend a weekend with your family. It is located just down the road from Charlotte Motor Speedway. The water park is only open to families who are hotel guests, and it offers swimming pools, water slides, a wave pool, and a special area for smaller children. You can make reservations online at http://www.greatwolf.com. Rates vary based on availability, so on busy weekends, the rates can be astronomical, but on less busy weekends, you can get a room for less than $200, and that includes your water park passes. 

 

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