If your daughter is participating in sorority recruitment, especially in the south, you need to be knee deep in preparations by now. If not, it’s not too late, but get busy. I wrote a piece in February called Don’t Sweat Fall Sorority Rush Yet, and in it, I included a timeline of preparation. It’s almost mid-June…let’s gooooooooo! To read the piece I mentioned, click here.
In the piece, the timeline mentions the wardrobe in July. That is when it should be shored up and ready to go. Shop now for rush appropriate dresses. That means you don’t want to be too flashy, too skimpy, or too matronly. Most college-age girls know what is fashionable, but if you wouldn’t wear it in front of your boyfriend’s mother, don’t wear it for rush.
If you haven’t registered for rush or made any required videos, get busy. I’ve mentioned this before: don’t read a script for your video, but have some talking points, making sure you cover any prompts they have requested. Smile and be confident, and use good lighting!
Millions of young women have participated in recruitment over the years; you can do this!
Please send any questions, comments, or concerns. I love getting questions!
Over the past week or so, I have seen several posts on Facebook in which people ask about a strange, “otherworldly” noise in the Charlotte area. “It sounds like what I think a UFO would sound like!” Well, it’s not an alien spacecraft. It’s the cicadas emerging. I know. They usually sound “buzzy,” but when they are emerging in abundant numbers, and when they aren’t right beside you, they can sound like what we think an alien spacecraft would sound like…kind of a pulsating whir.
I grew up in Alabama. We saw them every year. I know you’re thinking, “But they don’t emerge every year!” No, each brood doesn’t, but in Alabama, there is at least one brood emerging every year. In North Carolina, we only have nine broods, but in Alabama? Twenty! It’s a lot like snakes. In Mecklenburg County, we only have one species of venomous snake, the Copperhead. In Alabama? Six! Yes, six! Three different types of rattlesnakes, the Copperhead, the Cottonmouth (water moccasin), and the coral snake. If you live somewhere that you’ve never had to worry about venomous snakes (Hawaii, Maine, Rhode Island, or Alaska), then it could be a little shocking to encounter a snake elsewhere and wonder if it’s venomous or not. When you grow up in Alabama, if you spend any time outdoors as a child, you will encounter snakes. You will also learn how to identify them, and you will likely play with the exoskeletons of cicadas.
Growing up, we referred to the empty cicada exoskeletons as “locust shells,” even though cicadas and locusts aren’t even related. And yes, we played with the empty locust shells…wearing them on the tips of our fingers, collecting them, lining them up…nature fun. Somehow, we innately knew live cicadas are harmless creatures. We didn’t fear them at all, but then, we had other things to worry about, like all those snakes, alligators, gnats, and love bugs…and those giant horse lubber grasshoppers, which aren’t harmful, but they’re giant (up to four inches long) and downright scary looking. We didn’t really play with cicadas, just the “shell,” but we had no fear of the actual insect. It was just a normal part of spring/summer for us. We always knew there would be heat, humidity, and creatures.
So yes, that “otherworldly” sound you’re hearing around your house in Charlotte right now is the emerging cicadas…nothing to fear. Just be thankful we aren’t hearing other scary sounds. At least we won’t step into our backyards and hear the “rattle” of the rattlesnake. We don’t hear the throaty rumble/growl of the alligator or the defensive hiss of the horse lubber grasshopper. We’re also lucky we don’t have to deal with gnats when we sit by the pool, and we don’t have to wash the dead love bugs off our cars. And while we have red fire ants in North Carolina, they still aren’t as plentiful as they are in Alabama. Don’t get me wrong. I loved growing up in Alabama, and I love that I am familiar with all those creatures…a little too familiar with fire ants, since I learned I was allergic to them at a very young age, resulting in a trip to the hospital. I survived and gained a healthy respect for ant “beds,” which is what we called ant hills when I was growing up.
Those cicadas don’t seem so bad now, do they? They won’t hurt you. They don’t bite. They’re just a little noisy for a little while, and then they’ll be gone. Enjoy what we refer to in Alabama as “the sound of summer.”
***Amazon has some books about cicadas and some of the other creatures I mentioned above. For a book about venomous US snakes, click here. For the National Wildlife Federation Guide to Insects and Spider & Related Species of North America, click here.
***Wondering about some of the Alabama creatures I mentioned above? Here are some photos:
^^^Lubber Grasshoppers^^^
^^^Love Bugs^^^
^^^Red Fire Ants^^^
^^^Venomous Snakes of Alabama^^^ (photo from Outdoor Alabama)…for more info on venomous snakes of Alabama, click here.
The NFL Draft had me thinking about Kool-Aid. Yes, I was thinking about the football player, Kool-Aid McKinstry, and his deal with Kool-Aid brand beverage mix, but while I watched the Draft, I was also on the phone with a friend, and we started talking about the original Kool-Aid drink mix.
I cannot even tell you the last time I actually drank Kool-Aid, but when I was a kid, it was a staple at our house. I’m sure it was cheap, and that’s why my mother let us have it. Plus, it was easy to store the little packets without using up much room in the pantry. We would get to pick our own flavor packet(s) at the grocery store. Grape was always a safe flavor, and I feel like orange was pretty safe too. We didn’t branch out much, because if we picked a bad flavor, we were stuck with it until we went to the grocery store with Mother the next week. However, there was one time of year that we always had a different flavor.
For some reason, at our church, they always seemed to serve green Kool-Aid at Vacation Bible School during the summer. At the time, I thought it was lime flavored, but maybe it was lemon-lime? I can’t find any record of plain lime flavor. Whenever I think of VBS, I think of green Kool-Aid served in tiny, paper Dixie Cups and orange Push-Ups. No, not exercise pushups, but the sherbet treat that appears to be served in a toilet paper roll. If you were a kid when I was a kid, you know what I’m talking about. However, I’m not sure if my college-age daughter has ever even seen one! She’ll be home in a week; I’ll have some Push-Ups in the freezer when she gets home. If she doesn’t like them, I can make cocktails with them later.
So I was talking with my friend, named Kelli with an “i,” about VBS, and she reminded me that, not only did we have the Kool-Aid and Push-Ups at VBS, but we also had butter cookies! Remember butter cookies? You know, the ones that were shaped like little flowers with the hole in the middle? We would each get two or three at VBS and hold them on our fingers until we were ready to eat them. I hadn’t thought about those in years until Kelli mentioned them, but now, I have to go purchase some. They’re made by Lil Dutch Maid, and it appears they are sold in Publix for $1.25 for an 11 ounce package. No wonder they served them at VBS…they were cheap. Thinking about it, I realize now that the church was giving us the cheapest possible snacks they could give! It was the 1970s. If they tried to serve the same items today, it’s likely some moms would complain about “too much sugar” or “too much artificial flavoring/coloring.” In the 1970s, no one cared about that. Everything had artificial flavoring, and we lapped it up! Moms didn’t shop for “organic” foods…not where I lived, anyway. We were able to get fresh fruits and vegetables from local farms at the farmer’s market, so everything we ate wasn’t “bad,” but it was at VBS! Of course, this was the same era when you could toss just about anything into a Jell-O mold and call it a salad.
As usual, I find myself reliving my childhood, but this time, I will be reliving it through Kool-Aid, Push-Ups, and butter cookies. When I stop to pick up the lemon-lime Kool-Aid packets, I also hope I’ll find the limited edition Black Cherry Blitz Kool-Aid that was recently released as part of a merchandising deal with Kool-Aid McKinstry after his draft by the New Orleans Saints!
I suppose I can make cocktails with Black Cherry Blitz or Lime Kool-Aid! Do I mix them with vodka? Prosecco? I might be on to something here!
Congratulations! Your daughter has pledged a sorority. She is excited. You sent her a bid day gift, and she likely went on the pledge retreat.
Now what?
You should receive information soon about how to pay the bills. You should receive information about the chapter’s parent page on Facebook. And you likely need to get a white dress for your daughter to wear for initiation. At most schools in the south, sorority initiation occurs in late September or October. You will likely receive information about the date soon. Most sororities require a white dress, so find out if your daughter’s is one of them…and go ahead and order it! After initiation, they can hang onto the dress and possibly use it for Pref Night during recruitment next year! ***First, make sure they need a white dress, and find out if it needs to cover shoulders or not.***
Here are some great options from Amazon that won’t break the bank:
From Zesica at $49.99, a tiered white dress. Purchase here. (below)
Also from Zesica, at $45.59, a midi dress with shoulder ties. Purchase here. (below)
From Soly Hux, a flowy maxi dress, at $47.99. Purchase here. (below)
From Febriajuice, at $39.98, a maxi with spaghetti straps. Purchase here. (below)
From Exchic, a round neck, short-sleeve dress that covers the shoulders, priced at $27.85. Purchase here. (below)
For more options on white dresses at Amazon, click here.
I love Shopbop. I have been shopping with Shopbop for years, and a few years ago, I was lucky enough to stumble upon a Shopbop pop-up shop in New York! “Shopbop pop-up shop”…wow, that’s a lot of bops and pops.
Until recently, though, I didn’t know I could shop Shopbop through Amazon to take advantage of my Amazon Prime benefits...free shipping and easy, peasy, Amazon returns! It’s true! Shopbop has an Amazon shop! You can see it and shop it here.
If you’re a fan of Shopbop already, you know how awesome their offerings are. If you’re not a fan of Shopbop, it’s high time you became one. They have the latest styles in apparel, beauty, and accessories from brands at lots of different price points, and they have great sales too! They even have a section of “under $200 fashion finds”! All of it…all of it…is listed on their Amazon site!
Need a dress for an upcoming event? Shopbop. Need something to wear to an athletic event? Shopbop. Want to freshen your wardrobe? Shopbop. Just want to surprise your college-age daughter with a new bracelet or handbag? Shopbop.
Check it all out here. And if you’re still looking for some dresses for sorority recruitment, check out their sales section for dresses like those shown below!
If you’re planning to participate in sorority recruitment in the fall at a southern school, you likely registered already. Mark that off your checklist. You likely have your recommendations done. You probably have picked out your wardrobe and are just finishing up assembling your rush bag. What else is there to do?
Well, you have to wait, of course, but while you wait, there are some things you can do:
Shore up your wardrobe. Yes, you have a few dresses for rush, but depending on the school you are attending, you might need/want more than one dress per round. At The University of Alabama, for example, Philanthropy Round takes place over three days. You won’t know your schedule until everything gets started, so right now, you don’t know if you’ll have parties on one day, two days, or all three days. It’s best to be prepared for all three days. Sure, you can wear the same shorts/skirt to all three days of Philanthropy Round, but what if you sweat a lot in it? Will you want to wear it again? What if you spill something on it? Same for Sisterhood Round: if it takes place over two days, can you wear the same dress both days? Yes. Do you really want to? There’s still time to purchase another dress or two if you think you need it. Just remember, it’s hot in the south in August! Amazon has some cute dresses at these links:
Smocked Mini Dress. Y’all this inexpensive dress comes in several colors. I love all of them! They’re great for those really hot game days too! Priced under $30, these are adorable! See them here.
Love Shack Fancy. I know lots of girls love their Love Shack Fancy dresses. Get their cute Russ dress here. It’s pricy, but it’s cute!
One shoulder dress. Pretty Garden has an adorable one-shoulder tiered dress in several colors for under $50. Check it out here.
Another one-shoulder dress that resembles Love Shack Fancy, in my opinion. It also comes in lots of colors and is less than $50. See it here.
Amanda Uprichard dresses. Amanda Uprichard makes lots of great dresses for rush. See a selectionhere.
Belle Maison Collective. This boutique is out of Huntsville, Alabama, and they have some great options for rush…dresses, shoes, skirts, and shorts. Take a peek here.
Revolve. Check revolve.com for some great dress deals, since they have put a lot of seasonal items on sale! Click here.
Shopbop. Another great resource is shopbop.com. Click here.
Zara. At our house, we love Zara. Click here to see what they have.
Pick shoes. When picking which shoes you want to wear with which outfit during rush, remember you don’t need to be uncomfortable. If your feet are hurting throughout the process, you won’t feel your best, and likely won’t project your best self. This is not the time to try a new pair of stilettos. Also, don’t forget to have some comfy slippers/Crocs/flip flops in your Rush Bag, so you can wear them between parties.
Accessorize. It’s important to accessorize but not over-accessorize. Understated elegance is best…pearl earrings, small gold hoops, etc.
Rush Bag. Don’t forget to put together a Rush bag to help you freshen up between parties in weather so hot it feels like the surface of the sun! To see what you need for the bag, click here.
It’s almost time! So exciting! When my daughter went through the recruitment process last year, she made some great memories!
Most of our backyard is patio and pool. There is some grass, and I have a garden area, but most of the yard is patio and pool. Because most of the year has pretty mild temperatures in Charlotte, North Carolina, we get to enjoy it a lot.
During the spring of the pandemic (ugh, I hate even typing that word!), we were fortunate to have good weather. Starting the middle of March, our little family spent time on the patio almost every day. We had some great times with our friends and neighbors, but of course, at some point, we would always remember the “pandemic” that had interrupted all our lives. I wanted to jazz up the patio, just to give it a more fun feel, so I purchased some Solar Floating Pool Lights from Amazon (you can see them here), in hopes that I could throw them into the pool. They could absorb sunshine during the day and give us a color-changing light show(ish) at night!
They arrived, and I inflated them. I put them into the pool to absorb sunshine, so they would shine at night. We must not have had any breeze that day, because the floating pool lights didn’t seem to go rogue. But that night, when the wind picked up, all the floating lights skimmed across the water and “gathered” in one area of the pool. It just looked weird…not fun. So I got an idea…instead of using them in the pool, string them up and create a party light effect from the front of the poolhouse! Tacky? Yes! Fun? Yes, too! It just gave the patio a bit of color.
Those floating lights have been restrung on the front of the pool house a few times, but they’re still there! One of them split, and we had to replace it, but generally speaking, we keep six of them strung across the front of the pool house at all times. We used plain old fishing line and some hanging hooks…works like a charm! They add some colorful light without the hassle of electricity, reminding me every day that we found ways to have good times during the pandemic.
*The photo above is a file photo from Wikimedia Commons in 2008. It should not be used as an example of “what to wear” during recruitment 2023.*
Yes, it’s a thing. Moms get involved in sorority rush at big southern schools. Does that mean they’re actively going from house to house with their daughters? No. Oh Lord, I hope not…for their own sake but especially for their daughters’ sakes. But yes, Moms help their daughters prepare for rush. They worry about them. They get nervous. They feel all pain and all excitement. Some of them might have been in sororities themselves, and they want their daughters to pledge their chapter. Perhaps a mom has expectations about some chapters offering her daughter a bid. Maybe another mom thinks her daughter couldn’t possibly be dropped by a house. Maybe another one is worried hers will be dropped by every house.
The truth of the matter is that every mom is different, and every girl’s rush experience is different, so different moms and daughters will have different approaches. However, there are some things that are pretty universal…or should be:
Help prepare. For information on recruitment preparation, click here. Mom should be calling all her friends asking if any of them are sorority members, and if so, would they write a recommendation for her daughter? She should help her daughter shop for dresses and for the all-important “rush bag.” (See info about the Rush Bag here.) Most moms I know also proofread/edit their daughters’ resumes…or ask someone else to do it. And she should remind her daughter that it is important to keep an open mind about the chapters while she participates in recruitment.
Be supportive and positive. This is a stressful time for the girls, so they need the support from Mom. They need reassurance. They need you to be their cheerleaders this week. They need their moms to tell them how much they believe in them.
Be realistic. You have likely seen a list of the sorority chapters’ required or recommended GPAs for potential new members. Take those seriously. Those recommendations are there for a reason. No chapter wants to take a grade risk, because the “grade risk” is more likely not to stay in school, based on her academic history. Sororities like to maintain their membership, so if someone fails out of school, it hurts the chapter.
Be sympathetic. If/when daughter calls Mom and says, “My favorite house dropped me,” Mom needs to be sympathetic but not enabling. Do not enable your daughter to drop out of the process. If she will stick it out, chances are she will end up where she belongs. Encourage her to continue with the process! If she still has houses inviting her back, then she can still land somewhere she will be happy.
Be smart. Remember, some of recruitment is a numbers game. There are different reasons people get dropped, and it’s not always personal. It might be that a chapter is focusing on a different geographic area. It might be that a chapter has a lot of in-house sisters. It might be a GPA issue. Or maybe they are simply looking for something else. Mom, as difficult as it is, remind your daughter not to take it personally.
What are the no-nos for Mom? Well, different people have different thoughts, but I think it’s important for Mom to let her daughter fly. Don’t hover. Get her moved into the dorm, and then, let her start rush without Mom looking over her shoulder. If Mom doesn’t hover, the daughter can make new friends more quickly. And mom shouldn’t put undue pressure on her daughter to pledge where she wants her to pledge.
Mom, you’re likely to feel like you’re going through recruitment with your daughter, and in some ways, you are, but when it comes right down to it…it’s your daughter’s experience. Let her make it her own.
I know it’s only May, and most high school graduations haven’t even happened yet. Congratulations to all the 2023 graduates! You’ve finished that big part of life, and now you’re starting something new! Maybe you’re entering the working world. Maybe you’re going to trade/vocational school. Maybe you’re traveling for a while. Maybe you’re going to college. Whatever you’re doing, best of luck to you! If you’re planning to participate in sorority recruitment at a big, southern school, it’s time to start thinking about your “Rush bag.”
What’s a “Rush bag,” you ask? Well, it’s a water-resistant handbag that holds all the necessities for keeping one’s self fresh during a long August day outdoors in any southern state. What kind of bag should you use? What things should go in it? Fear not, for I have answers.
For the bag itself, I recommend waterproof or, at least, water resistant.
Rush bag. If you know a young lady who is graduating from high school and planning to participate in sorority recruitment at a big, southern university, a “rush bag” makes a great gift. She will definitely need one! You’ll want to start with a water-resistant bag with a zipper closure. These bags will be left outside sorority houses on the ground when they go inside, so they don’t need to be fancy bags. I found a perfect one that comes in multiple colors on Amazon for about $25 here. (See photo at bottom of page.) If you opt for that one, I think the medium size is great. If you want to go with a Longchamp-style nylon bag from Amazon…shop here. If you want to add the necessities for recruitment, you can add all of these or some of these items:
Handheld, battery-operated fan. It’s hot in the south. The heat and humidity are no joke. She will need a fan. Our daughter used this one last year. And at $11.99, it’s priced right and comes in a variety of colors.
Waterproof folding changing pad. Sounds crazy, I know, but the girls will be wearing dresses and will need to sit on the ground some during the day. They can save their dresses from grass stains or water spots with this. We got our daughter this one.
Blotting papers. All that heat and humidity produces sweat…blot away the shine with blotting papers. Get some from NYX at Amazon for just $4.99 here.
Insulated Water Bottle. They’ll need cold water each day. Pick a water bottle from Amazon here.
Hand sanitizer. This is pretty obvious. We purchased our daughter some Purell travel-sized hand sanitizers to use between parties. Get them from Amazon here.
Small umbrella. A small folding umbrella is crucial in the south, where thunderstorms can crop up at any time. When I asked my daughter which item she used most from her rush bag, her immediate answer was “the umbrella.” We got a great one at Amazon here.
Tissues. These come in handy. You never know when you’ll need a tissue. Get Amazon’s Choice here.
Deodorant. This is a more personal item, so you can include it or not. I think it’s nice to include one just as a possibility. Get some small, travel sizes at Amazon here.
Breath Strips. The girls spend a lot of time going to lots of parties, and they are in crowds. They want fresh breath. Sure, they can use mints, but I think breath strips are better, because they dissolve quickly. Get them from Amazon for $5.09 here.
Portable charger. The girls don’t want their phones to die in the middle of the day, so a portable charger comes in handy. For a small, inexpensive one, click here.
Lip gloss or balm. Most people have their own cosmetics they love, but Dior Addict lip products are loved by lots of people! If you don’t want to choose a color, their lip balms, maximizers, and oils come in clear versions too. See them here.
Band Aids. I would add some regular Band Aids from here. And some blister Band Aids from here.
Snack. Gatorade Recovery Protein Bars are great snacks for those hot days…something to put some pep in their step. It’s a great small snack, because it provides a little protein.My daughter loves these on the go. Get some here.
Safety pins. For little emergencies, these come in handy. Get a small packet here.
Feminine products. You definitely want to have feminine hygiene products on hand, in case you need them.
Painkillers such as Ibuprofen or Acetaminophen. Also, a dose of any regular medications you take.
You can include a notebook and pen, but I feel like most girls take notes on their phones.
In reality, you hope you won’t need to use the items in your rush bag, but you want to be prepared. You don’t want to have to walk around asking people if they have safety pins or Band Aids if you need one, and you definitely don’t want to use someone else’s makeup or deodorant.
***I’m hoping to compile a list of questions and answers about southern sorority rush. Please send any questions to me!***
Sorority recruitment (rush) preparation in the south.
Planning to participate in recruitment at a big, southern school? Don’t fret. Yes, recruitment is a big deal at big, southern schools, and it can be intimidating, but there’s a method to the madness. I hear lots of high school seniors and their moms talking about it every year, so I’m going to give a few suggestions. I don’t claim to know everything, but I do know it is likely to go more smoothly if you do your homework and prepare.I am a mom who joined a sorority at a big, southern school in the 80s, and I have a daughter in a sorority at a big, southern school now. I have lots of friends who have daughters in sororities at big, southern schools. That’s my background, so glean what you will from the information below.
I am not a rush consultant or coach.
Every year, I hear about people from different parts of the country who send their daughters to southern schools, and they are surprised at how popular and stressful sorority recruitment is in this part of the country. That’s why I say “do your homework.” If I had been sending my daughter to college in Michigan or California, I would have expected a different rush experience for her, and we would have had to do a lot of homework to see how it goes there. I, likely, would have started doing my homework as soon as she knew where she was going to school, but here is some information that might help if you don’t know how to deal with recruitment in the south. All the information might not apply to every southern college or university, but hopefully, you will find the information helpful.
How to prepare for recruitment in the south? It’s important that moms help. No, don’t do all the legwork, but be there to remind your daughter about deadlines and to edit/proofread the resumé. Preparation can depend on the school, but generally speaking, here are some things you can do:
Update your social resumé. This is a good starting point, because you will need to give a social resumé to women who write recommendations for you (more on that below). There are different apps for creating a social resumé. My daughter used the Canva app. You can look for sample resumés online. Don’t panic if you see ads for “rush packets.” For most alumnae who will be writing recommendations, those packets are not only not necessary, but they’re also not wanted. A resumé plus a headshot will be all you need, in most cases. I haven’t talked to any alumnae or rush chairmen/advisors in the past five years who have wanted packets. For recruitment, make sure your social resumé includes:
your full name,
the name you actually use…example: legal name is Elizabeth, but you go by Betsy
your home address/phone number/email address
your parents’ names/colleges/Greek affiliations
your standardized test scores/GPA/class rank (if your school ranks)
your extracurricular activities/honors/leadership positions
work experience/community service/interests
other family Greek affiliations.
Lots of girls, like my daughter and all her friends, also include a photo on the resumé.
Register for recruitment.Do not miss the deadline. Read all the information. Know the cost of joining and being a member of a sorority. At some schools, it’s a few hundred dollars a year. At some larger schools with big sorority houses, it can be between $7,000 and $10,000 per year. Do your homework! At my daughter’s university, the student and the parents sign a contract saying they understand the cost. It is important to know this…and keep in mind the costs they post don’t include the dresses she’ll need for formals/parties, the t-shirts she will get afterward, pictures, and more! It is unfair to the student and to the chapter to join if you cannot afford it. ***See bottom of page for some southern schools’ recruitment info/guides.***
Follow the Panhellenic Instagram and the Instagram accounts of all the sororities at the college or university you will be attending. This is a way of showing interest in the sororities, and it’s a great way for you to learn more about each chapter. You actually can learn a lot about the feel of a chapter by its posts, just like you can learn something about a person from his/her posts on social media. And that leads me to…
Clean up social media. Southern sororities rely heavily on social media these days to get a bigger picture of the potential new member. If you’re planning to participate, go through the photos/posts on your social media accounts, including Facebook, Instagram, and Tiktok. If there are risqué outfits or alcohol in your photos, remove those photos. If there are risqué outfits or dances in your Tiktok videos, remove them. You don’t have to look like you don’t have any fun, but you want your social media to be a clean representation of who you are. Sororities want to get a bigger picture of who you are and what you enjoy. *Sororities at some schools like for potential new members to have public Instagram accounts, so they can get to know you better.*
Make and submit video, if required.*Some schools require potential new members to submit a video.* If you are required to submit a video before recruitment, you want your personality to shine through, but you also want it to be the best representation of you. You don’t want to be in a swimsuit or too casually dressed. You want to look your best.This is your first impression moment! There will be guidelines to follow. They often ask for a background that is not distracting, and you need to have good lighting that highlights you and not the area around you. Speak clearly and answer the prompts. My daughter had to pick three prompts from six or eight. I recommend having a loose script or some highlights to cover when making your video…or even a big cue card hanging on the wall. Be memorable…in a good way. And remember…a smile is your best accessory! *If the video is optional, do it.* ***Also, I recommend using a tripod to hold the camera and a Ring light for best facial lighting.***
Get recommendations from sorority alumni. If at all possible, get recommendations from sorority alumnae. Moms can ask on Facebook if they have friends who are sorority alumnae who are willing to write recommendations. Some sororities do not require/accept recommendations, but some require them. For big, southern schools, it’s a good idea to have at least one to each house, if possible. Lots of people believe you need to give alumnae “packets” containing a letter, your resume, and a headshot. That’s old school. Most sororities accept (and prefer) recommendations online now, so most alumnae do not want packets. I do not want packets; they are the bane of my existence. I always ask girls to send me a resumé and photo online, and I include that with my online recommendation. The recommendations are actually done with online forms through a sorority’s national website. They are not personally-written letters. They are forms, but alumnae can add comment to the forms. Recommendations do not guarantee anything. They are simply a “formal” introduction from an alumna to a chapter.
Make connections. Different schools have different rules about contact before recruitment. My daughter’s school has very strict rules regarding contact between potential new members and sorority members. Other schools allow contact right up until the start of recruitment. You can usually find the rules on the school’s Panhellenic website. Get the word out to friends and family that you will be participating in recruitment. You never know who might know a sorority member at a school. ***If you’re going to a larger southern school, you might need to set your Instagram account to “public” until rush is over. It’s a way for the girls in sororities to get to know you better.***
Start preparing your “rush bag.” I have a whole post about rush bags and what goes into them. “Rush bags” are handbags for potential new members to carry with them during the recruitment process. They contain necessities for hot days, rainy days, and wardrobe emergencies. My post even has links to lots of the needed items, so it makes your shopping easier. See it here.
Start thinking about wardrobe, including shoes. Most southern schools have published information about 2023 recruitment, or they will soon. Read it, and learn what you’ll need to wear for each day. At my daughter’s school, the first round is watching videos of the chapters. The girls are issued t-shirts to wear for the second round; they wear them with cute shorts or skorts/skirts…and I don’t mean “booty” shorts. Cute dressier shorts or a skirt will be perfect. They need dresses for the next round, and they need a dress for the preference round, but all of that is different at different schools! Keep that in mind! Do your homework! Make sure you have an extra dress or two, in case of spills or if you need options, Obviously, different schools have different styles…even across the south. What is popular at Baylor might not work at SMU or South Carolina. What works at Georgia might not work at TCU or Florida State. Look at sorority Instagrams. Look at the Instagram accounts of girls who go there; you will likely see some pictures that will help. Don’t wear anything skimpy or too tight. Fitted is fine; too tight is a no-no. Last year, for our daughter going to Bama, we looked at Zara and Amanda Uprichard. There are some cute Amanda Uprichard styles on Amazon. For shoes, our daughter took nice sneakers for the first two days and comfortable low-heeled, nude-colored wedges for other days, except a dressier pair of shoes for Preference Day. The goal is to wear tasteful, flattering dresses that are comfortable. You don’t want to be fidgeting with your clothes, and if you aren’t comfortable, it will show. ***Also, some chapters require girls to have simple white dresses for formal pledging soon after Bid Day. It’s a good idea to have one on hand, just in case! They often go on sale after July 4 at lots of stores.Simple, modest, not low-cut, covered shoulders preferred. My daughter wore the white romper below, and no one was the wiser.***Here are a few simple styles I saw on some girls during recruitment last year. But keep in mind, you need to get what’s right for YOU and what’s right for the climate and vibe at the school you are attending:
Amanda Uprichard Allora Dress, some colors offered at $85 at time of writing. Several colors availablehere.
Amanda Uprichard Fiori Dress, some sizes offered at $93 at time of writing. Purchase here.
*This is a romper simply because it has shorts built in underneath, but it does not show as a romper. It looks like a dress.*
Steve Madden Apparel Kianna Dress, $89. Click here.
These are a few things you can do to get prepared for the experience ahead of recruitment. It’s something most people will experience only once in their lives. Be prepared.
Recruitment can be a lot of fun. Be yourself, and be open-minded. Those are the two most important things. You got this!
***If you have suggestions you would like to add to the above, please leave a comment!***
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