*The photo above is a file photo from Wikimedia Commons in 2008. It should not be used as an example of “what to wear” during recruitment 2023.*
Yes, it’s a thing. Moms get involved in sorority rush at big southern schools. Does that mean they’re actively going from house to house with their daughters? No. Oh Lord, I hope not…for their own sake but especially for their daughters’ sakes. But yes, Moms help their daughters prepare for rush. They worry about them. They get nervous. They feel all pain and all excitement. Some of them might have been in sororities themselves, and they want their daughters to pledge their chapter. Perhaps a mom has expectations about some chapters offering her daughter a bid. Maybe another mom thinks her daughter couldn’t possibly be dropped by a house. Maybe another one is worried hers will be dropped by every house.
The truth of the matter is that every mom is different, and every girl’s rush experience is different, so different moms and daughters will have different approaches. However, there are some things that are pretty universal…or should be:
Help prepare. For information on recruitment preparation, click here. Mom should be calling all her friends asking if any of them are sorority members, and if so, would they write a recommendation for her daughter? She should help her daughter shop for dresses and for the all-important “rush bag.” (See info about the Rush Bag here.) Most moms I know also proofread/edit their daughters’ resumes…or ask someone else to do it. And she should remind her daughter that it is important to keep an open mind about the chapters while she participates in recruitment.
Be supportive and positive. This is a stressful time for the girls, so they need the support from Mom. They need reassurance. They need you to be their cheerleaders this week. They need their moms to tell them how much they believe in them.
Be realistic. You have likely seen a list of the sorority chapters’ required or recommended GPAs for potential new members. Take those seriously. Those recommendations are there for a reason. No chapter wants to take a grade risk, because the “grade risk” is more likely not to stay in school, based on her academic history. Sororities like to maintain their membership, so if someone fails out of school, it hurts the chapter.
Be sympathetic. If/when daughter calls Mom and says, “My favorite house dropped me,” Mom needs to be sympathetic but not enabling. Do not enable your daughter to drop out of the process. If she will stick it out, chances are she will end up where she belongs. Encourage her to continue with the process! If she still has houses inviting her back, then she can still land somewhere she will be happy.
Be smart. Remember, some of recruitment is a numbers game. There are different reasons people get dropped, and it’s not always personal. It might be that a chapter is focusing on a different geographic area. It might be that a chapter has a lot of in-house sisters. It might be a GPA issue. Or maybe they are simply looking for something else. Mom, as difficult as it is, remind your daughter not to take it personally.
What are the no-nos for Mom? Well, different people have different thoughts, but I think it’s important for Mom to let her daughter fly. Don’t hover. Get her moved into the dorm, and then, let her start rush without Mom looking over her shoulder. If Mom doesn’t hover, the daughter can make new friends more quickly. And mom shouldn’t put undue pressure on her daughter to pledge where she wants her to pledge.
Mom, you’re likely to feel like you’re going through recruitment with your daughter, and in some ways, you are, but when it comes right down to it…it’s your daughter’s experience. Let her make it her own.
Last year, at this time in summer, my daughter and I were spending a lot of time trying to figure out what she needed and wanted for her dorm room. We were fortunate her roommate’s mother is a designer, so for the decor, I just needed to write a check…no decisions to be made on my part. However, there were lots of other things to consider. FYI: Amazon Prime Days are July 11-12 this year, so keep that in mind. You can save loads of money on Prime Days. If you don’t have an Amazon Prime account, now is definitely the time to get one. Your student can get a prime account for half price…a little-known fact…and get a 6-month free trial! It’s worth it, for sure! Check out the student account here. There are lots of great dorm deals to be had on Amazon Prime Days.
Before I get any deeper into this, let me remind you to LABEL EVERYTHING THAT GOES INTO A DORM ROOM WITH YOUR STUDENT’S NAME. It’s no joke. Sure, things will still go missing, but if something is located, at least there will be no question about the ownership. You don’t need special labels. All you need is a Sharpie marker. I keep them at my house in bulk. You can order a box of them here. Or get just three here. I wrote my daughter’s name in the corners of her bath towels, hand towels, washcloths, and even in the tags of some of her clothes! I even write our names and phone numbers on luggage, just as a safeguard in case the tags are removed or fall off at the airport. I’m a crazy lady with a Sharpie, no doubt, but it came in handy, when there was a question about which towels were hers at move-out.
And did you know there are “invite-only deals” on Amazon? Yes! It’s a thing! Just click on the link here and scroll down to “invite-only deals.” Request an invitation, and on Prime Days, you’ll receive an email with the info to purchase the discounted item! It’s insanity!
Don’t forget there are daily deals on Amazon every single day for Prime members! To see today’s “off to college” deals, click here. At time of writing, I see deals on Amazon Fire TV, velvet hangers (you need these to save space in small dorm-room closets!), sheets, surge protectors, cordless vacuums, fans, storage bins, and more…up to 79% off some items! Get busy shopping now!
My daughter graduated from high school last year. It was an exciting and scary time. Everybody talks about the excitement, but it seems not many people talk about the fear. I remember 18. I remember graduating from high school. I knew where I was going to college, but I didn’t really know what it would be like. I had visited the campus many times for cheerleaders camps and football games, but I didn’t really know what it would be like to live in a dorm with a roommate I didn’t know. There is such a thing as fear of the unknown. That didn’t mean I wasn’t excited. I was very excited to be going off to college. I was excited to make new friends. I was excited that I wasn’t doing “13th grade,” which is what we call it when people go to college with lots of their friends from high school. However, I didn’t really know what was ahead of me.
When I look back at pictures from this time last year, I remember my daughter and I were preparing to attend her college orientation. Yes, I had to go to orientation simply so she wouldn’t look like an orphan. Apparently, parents going to orientation is popular now, unlike when I went in the 80s. Do I need to remind you that I drove myself to orientation without my parents? I drove without GPS or a cell phone. I just looked at the map before I left and figured it out. We came home from our daughter’s orientation and tried to enjoy the summer, but even though I don’t think of our daughter as an anxious person, there was trepidation. She was looking forward to everything college life offered, but wondering what to expect, and it showed itself in tears and agitation.
All that freshman year college stuff is behind us now. I look at my daughter’s friends who are preparing to go to college, and I remember what it was like at my house last year. She was nervous. She was scared but wouldn’t admit it. She was fearing the unknown a bit. Therefore, I am reminding parents that it’s not all rainbows and confetti. Going off to college is a big deal. I feel like our daughter learned more in her first year of college than in any other year since toddlerhood. I’m not even including the academics! I mean she learned more about life, in general. She developed more problem-solving skills. She developed more time-management skills. She learned more about taking care of herself and her friends. She learned about living away from home. And she survived it! She not only survived, but she thrived!
And you know what? It’s stressful for them! They might not process it as stress, but the stress is there, and it takes a toll on their bodies. They often live around a lot more people than when they are home, so all kinds of germs are passed around. They end up sick. My daughter had strep throat for the first time since she was a kid. She had the flu for the first time since she was 11. She had a horrible skin infection that started from a heel blister. She was in a car accident. All of that = stress. I’m no psychologist or counselor, but I could see the effects of the stress.
What I’m telling you is you should be happy and excited about your child’s college experience. At the same time, know you are going to get those phone calls. “Mom, I’ve been in an accident.” “Mom, I think I have a fever.” “Mom, should I go to the doctor about this wound on my heel?” You’ll be far away, so you can offer guidance, but you’re not there. They have to actually take care of business. And you know what? They will.
In most cases, they will pull themselves together and get things done. Most of them will make it to class on a regular basis. Most of them will weather the storm. Some of them might not make it academically the first time around, but does that mean they are doomed to failure? No. I have a friend who failed out of college our sophomore year. She went back a few years later and graduated before going on to law school and graduating at the top of her class. Another friend had a 1.6 GPA at the end of his first semester of freshman year. He buckled down the next semester and succeeded at Duke, going on to medical school.
Just remember: we have to trust them but guide them. If at first they don’t succeed, they can try again. They are going to have missteps along the way, and they will learn from them. Just like Elon Musk told the world after a recent failed rocket launch; he reminded us SpaceX will learn from the mistakes on the failed launch and apply that knowledge to the next one.
Keep smiling, moms and dads. Sometimes, they just need to see we, the parents, are calm. It’s a bit like taking a child to the pediatrician when they are sick. Often, the parents just need reassurance. Many times, that’s what our college-age kids need too.
Congratulations to all the 2023 high school graduates…the ones who are going to college, the ones who are taking a gap year, the ones who are learning a trade, the ones entering military service, and the ones who are going into the work force! I celebrate them all! It might sound like I’m only celebrating the ones going to college, but that’s certainly not the case. I’m simply drawing on my own experience. But if your child is entering the workforce or entering military service or taking a gap year or going to trade school, you’re worrying about them just the same.
Fasten your seat belts, moms and dads. It’s going to be a bumpy ride.
I know it’s only May, and most high school graduations haven’t even happened yet. Congratulations to all the 2023 graduates! You’ve finished that big part of life, and now you’re starting something new! Maybe you’re entering the working world. Maybe you’re going to trade/vocational school. Maybe you’re traveling for a while. Maybe you’re going to college. Whatever you’re doing, best of luck to you! If you’re planning to participate in sorority recruitment at a big, southern school, it’s time to start thinking about your “Rush bag.”
What’s a “Rush bag,” you ask? Well, it’s a water-resistant handbag that holds all the necessities for keeping one’s self fresh during a long August day outdoors in any southern state. What kind of bag should you use? What things should go in it? Fear not, for I have answers.
For the bag itself, I recommend waterproof or, at least, water resistant.
Rush bag. If you know a young lady who is graduating from high school and planning to participate in sorority recruitment at a big, southern university, a “rush bag” makes a great gift. She will definitely need one! You’ll want to start with a water-resistant bag with a zipper closure. These bags will be left outside sorority houses on the ground when they go inside, so they don’t need to be fancy bags. I found a perfect one that comes in multiple colors on Amazon for about $25 here. (See photo at bottom of page.) If you opt for that one, I think the medium size is great. If you want to go with a Longchamp-style nylon bag from Amazon…shop here. If you want to add the necessities for recruitment, you can add all of these or some of these items:
Handheld, battery-operated fan. It’s hot in the south. The heat and humidity are no joke. She will need a fan. Our daughter used this one last year. And at $11.99, it’s priced right and comes in a variety of colors.
Waterproof folding changing pad. Sounds crazy, I know, but the girls will be wearing dresses and will need to sit on the ground some during the day. They can save their dresses from grass stains or water spots with this. We got our daughter this one.
Blotting papers. All that heat and humidity produces sweat…blot away the shine with blotting papers. Get some from NYX at Amazon for just $4.99 here.
Insulated Water Bottle. They’ll need cold water each day. Pick a water bottle from Amazon here.
Hand sanitizer. This is pretty obvious. We purchased our daughter some Purell travel-sized hand sanitizers to use between parties. Get them from Amazon here.
Small umbrella. A small folding umbrella is crucial in the south, where thunderstorms can crop up at any time. When I asked my daughter which item she used most from her rush bag, her immediate answer was “the umbrella.” We got a great one at Amazon here.
Tissues. These come in handy. You never know when you’ll need a tissue. Get Amazon’s Choice here.
Deodorant. This is a more personal item, so you can include it or not. I think it’s nice to include one just as a possibility. Get some small, travel sizes at Amazon here.
Breath Strips. The girls spend a lot of time going to lots of parties, and they are in crowds. They want fresh breath. Sure, they can use mints, but I think breath strips are better, because they dissolve quickly. Get them from Amazon for $5.09 here.
Portable charger. The girls don’t want their phones to die in the middle of the day, so a portable charger comes in handy. For a small, inexpensive one, click here.
Lip gloss or balm. Most people have their own cosmetics they love, but Dior Addict lip products are loved by lots of people! If you don’t want to choose a color, their lip balms, maximizers, and oils come in clear versions too. See them here.
Band Aids. I would add some regular Band Aids from here. And some blister Band Aids from here.
Snack. Gatorade Recovery Protein Bars are great snacks for those hot days…something to put some pep in their step. It’s a great small snack, because it provides a little protein.My daughter loves these on the go. Get some here.
Safety pins. For little emergencies, these come in handy. Get a small packet here.
Feminine products. You definitely want to have feminine hygiene products on hand, in case you need them.
Painkillers such as Ibuprofen or Acetaminophen. Also, a dose of any regular medications you take.
You can include a notebook and pen, but I feel like most girls take notes on their phones.
In reality, you hope you won’t need to use the items in your rush bag, but you want to be prepared. You don’t want to have to walk around asking people if they have safety pins or Band Aids if you need one, and you definitely don’t want to use someone else’s makeup or deodorant.
***I’m hoping to compile a list of questions and answers about southern sorority rush. Please send any questions to me!***
Graduation ceremonies are happening…or at the very least, they are just around the corner. I have listed some graduation gifts in the last few months in some previous posts, but just in case you missed them, I’m sharing the pieces again. Check out the links here:
High School Graduation Gifts for 2023, click here for the first graduation gifts I suggested this year. They are in all different price ranges, and I highly recommend them.
More High School Graduation Gifts. For a few more suggestions, and some that are unusual, click here.
More High School Graduation Gifts (and these are good!) To see my last list of graduation gifts for this year, click here
Hulken bags. I had to list these separately in different posts over the last few weeks, because I believe these are some of the best gifts ever. My college-age daughter has one, and I have one, and we find lots of great uses for them: retail returns, bringing stuff in from the car, even laundry at college! These big bags on wheels are lightweight and easy to use! Seriously, the graduate in your life needs this bag. Pick a color. I highly recommend the more manageable size Medium. To purchase, click here.
.I’m hoping you found some fun ideas in my lists. And remember, if you have an Amazon Prime Membership, most items ship for free! Happy Shopping!
More high school graduations gifts. I’m always looking for ideas for graduation gifts, and this week, I came upon some great ones. I know my daughter would have loved any or all of these gifts last year when she graduated:
Yeti products. Y’all, we all know Yeti makes some tough, incredible products. I love their cups, their coolers, and their lock boxes. My personal favorite cooler is the Tundra 45…perfect size for the necessary number of cans and ice for a tailgate. But they also make great backpacks and duffle bags! Check out Yeti products on Amazon here. Lots of their items are Prime eligible, meaning free shipping for members of Amazon Prime! There’s a huge range of prices, starting at about $25 for some of their insulated cups to over $1000 for some of their larger coolers. I have given coolers as graduation gifts for boys before (not the $1000 ones!), and I have given cups and lock boxes too. If you have a special nephew, he’ll probably appreciate the Tundra 45 cooler.
Rush bag. If you know a young lady who is graduating from high school and planning to participate in sorority recruitment at a big, southern university, a “rush bag” makes a great gift. She will definitely need one! You’ll want to start with a water-resistant bag with a zipper closure. These bags will be left outside sorority houses on the ground when they go inside, so they don’t need to be fancy bags. I found a perfect one on Amazon for about $25 here. If you opt for that one, I think the medium size is great. If you want to go with a “better” bag, you can always get a Longchamp nylon bag from Amazon…shop here. If you want to add the necessities for recruitment, you can add all of these or some of these items:
Handheld, battery-operated fan. It’s hot in the south. The heat and humidity are no joke. She will need a fan. Our daughter used this one last year. And at $11.99, it’s priced right and comes in a variety of colors.
Waterproof folding changing pad. Sounds crazy, I know, but the girls will be wearing dresses and will need to sit on the ground some during the day. They can save their dresses from grass stains or water spots with this. We got our daughter this one.
Blotting papers. All that heat and humidity produces sweat…blot away the shine with blotting papers. Get some from NYX at Amazon for just $4.99 here.
Insulated Water Bottle. They’ll need cold water each day. Pick a water bottle from Amazon here.
Hand sanitizer. This is pretty obvious. We purchased our daughter some Purell travel-sized hand sanitizers to use between parties. Get them from Amazon here.
Small umbrella. A small folding umbrella is crucial in the south, where thunderstorms can crop up at any time. We got a great one at Amazon here.
Tissues. These come in handy. You never know when you’ll need a tissue. Get Amazon’s Choice here.
Deodorant. This is a more personal item, so you can include it or not. I think it’s nice to include one just as a possibility. Get some small, travel sizes at Amazon here.
Breath Strips. The girls spend a lot of time going to lots of parties, and they are in crowds. They want fresh breath. Sure, they can use mints, but I think breath strips are better, because they dissolve quickly. Get them from Amazon for $5.09 here.
Portable charger. The girls don’t want their phones to die in the middle of the day, so a portable charger comes in handy. For a small one with a lightning plug and great output, click here.
Lip gloss or balm. Most people have their own cosmetics they love, but Dior Addict lip products are loved by lots of people! If you don’t want to choose a color, their lip balms, maximizers, and oils come in clear versions too. See them here.
Band Aids. I would add some regular Band Aids from here. And some blister Band Aids from here.
Snack. I’ve mentioned Whoa Dough before. It’s a great small snack, because it provides a little protein but is gluten free, dairy free, egg free and soy free! My daughter loves these on the go. Get a variety pack here.
Safety pins. For little emergencies, these come in handy. Get a small packet here.
You can include a notebook and pen, but I feel like most girls take notes on their phones.
Keurig Mini Coffee Maker. Know a grad who loves coffee or hot chocolate? This makes a great gift. A friend gave my daughter one last year, and she used it regularly throughout her freshman year. Get it at Amazon here.
Zumer Sport Products. I discovered these products recently, and wow! Zumer Sport makes duffel bags, dopp kits, and backpacks from actual football leather, baseball materials, etc. And they are personalized for different colleges! I know lots of grads who would love to receive something from Zumer Sport! Great for boys and girls! See their selection here.
Those are just a few more ideas, and frankly, they are some of my favorites! Any/all of these gifts would be a big hit with any graduate! Don’t just sit there! Get that shopping done now!
I just discovered something I wish I’d had last weekend when I moved our daughter out of her dorm…a Rubbermaid collapsible laundry cart! When fully expanded, it stands at almost 36 inches tall, 24 inches wide, and 34.6 inches long, and it supports 220 pounds of load! Y’all, I need this for move-in and move-out next year, but I think I can find uses for it around the house! Seriously! Priced at $178 on sale (regularly $245), I’m ordering one right now. Purchase it here.
I have already seen lots of parents on the Facebook parents page for my daughter’s university complaining about the lack of moving carts in the dorms. This could solve that problem. Order today, and you might have it in time to move out your college student. If I order right now (12:12pm on Tuesday, May 2), I will have mine by Thursday. Hopefully, you could get yours that quickly too!
Truly, I think this is something I can use around the house on a regular basis…for laundry, for gardening, for de-cluttering, for taking towels out to the pool.
Sorority recruitment (rush) preparation in the south.
Planning to participate in recruitment at a big, southern school? Don’t fret. Yes, recruitment is a big deal at big, southern schools, and it can be intimidating, but there’s a method to the madness. I hear lots of high school seniors and their moms talking about it every year, so I’m going to give a few suggestions. I don’t claim to know everything, but I do know it is likely to go more smoothly if you do your homework and prepare.I am a mom who joined a sorority at a big, southern school in the 80s, and I have a daughter in a sorority at a big, southern school now. I have lots of friends who have daughters in sororities at big, southern schools. That’s my background, so glean what you will from the information below.
I am not a rush consultant or coach.
Every year, I hear about people from different parts of the country who send their daughters to southern schools, and they are surprised at how popular and stressful sorority recruitment is in this part of the country. That’s why I say “do your homework.” If I had been sending my daughter to college in Michigan or California, I would have expected a different rush experience for her, and we would have had to do a lot of homework to see how it goes there. I, likely, would have started doing my homework as soon as she knew where she was going to school, but here is some information that might help if you don’t know how to deal with recruitment in the south. All the information might not apply to every southern college or university, but hopefully, you will find the information helpful.
How to prepare for recruitment in the south? It’s important that moms help. No, don’t do all the legwork, but be there to remind your daughter about deadlines and to edit/proofread the resumé. Preparation can depend on the school, but generally speaking, here are some things you can do:
Update your social resumé. This is a good starting point, because you will need to give a social resumé to women who write recommendations for you (more on that below). There are different apps for creating a social resumé. My daughter used the Canva app. You can look for sample resumés online. Don’t panic if you see ads for “rush packets.” For most alumnae who will be writing recommendations, those packets are not only not necessary, but they’re also not wanted. A resumé plus a headshot will be all you need, in most cases. I haven’t talked to any alumnae or rush chairmen/advisors in the past five years who have wanted packets. For recruitment, make sure your social resumé includes:
your full name,
the name you actually use…example: legal name is Elizabeth, but you go by Betsy
your home address/phone number/email address
your parents’ names/colleges/Greek affiliations
your standardized test scores/GPA/class rank (if your school ranks)
your extracurricular activities/honors/leadership positions
work experience/community service/interests
other family Greek affiliations.
Lots of girls, like my daughter and all her friends, also include a photo on the resumé.
Register for recruitment.Do not miss the deadline. Read all the information. Know the cost of joining and being a member of a sorority. At some schools, it’s a few hundred dollars a year. At some larger schools with big sorority houses, it can be between $7,000 and $10,000 per year. Do your homework! At my daughter’s university, the student and the parents sign a contract saying they understand the cost. It is important to know this…and keep in mind the costs they post don’t include the dresses she’ll need for formals/parties, the t-shirts she will get afterward, pictures, and more! It is unfair to the student and to the chapter to join if you cannot afford it. ***See bottom of page for some southern schools’ recruitment info/guides.***
Follow the Panhellenic Instagram and the Instagram accounts of all the sororities at the college or university you will be attending. This is a way of showing interest in the sororities, and it’s a great way for you to learn more about each chapter. You actually can learn a lot about the feel of a chapter by its posts, just like you can learn something about a person from his/her posts on social media. And that leads me to…
Clean up social media. Southern sororities rely heavily on social media these days to get a bigger picture of the potential new member. If you’re planning to participate, go through the photos/posts on your social media accounts, including Facebook, Instagram, and Tiktok. If there are risqué outfits or alcohol in your photos, remove those photos. If there are risqué outfits or dances in your Tiktok videos, remove them. You don’t have to look like you don’t have any fun, but you want your social media to be a clean representation of who you are. Sororities want to get a bigger picture of who you are and what you enjoy. *Sororities at some schools like for potential new members to have public Instagram accounts, so they can get to know you better.*
Make and submit video, if required.*Some schools require potential new members to submit a video.* If you are required to submit a video before recruitment, you want your personality to shine through, but you also want it to be the best representation of you. You don’t want to be in a swimsuit or too casually dressed. You want to look your best.This is your first impression moment! There will be guidelines to follow. They often ask for a background that is not distracting, and you need to have good lighting that highlights you and not the area around you. Speak clearly and answer the prompts. My daughter had to pick three prompts from six or eight. I recommend having a loose script or some highlights to cover when making your video…or even a big cue card hanging on the wall. Be memorable…in a good way. And remember…a smile is your best accessory! *If the video is optional, do it.* ***Also, I recommend using a tripod to hold the camera and a Ring light for best facial lighting.***
Get recommendations from sorority alumni. If at all possible, get recommendations from sorority alumnae. Moms can ask on Facebook if they have friends who are sorority alumnae who are willing to write recommendations. Some sororities do not require/accept recommendations, but some require them. For big, southern schools, it’s a good idea to have at least one to each house, if possible. Lots of people believe you need to give alumnae “packets” containing a letter, your resume, and a headshot. That’s old school. Most sororities accept (and prefer) recommendations online now, so most alumnae do not want packets. I do not want packets; they are the bane of my existence. I always ask girls to send me a resumé and photo online, and I include that with my online recommendation. The recommendations are actually done with online forms through a sorority’s national website. They are not personally-written letters. They are forms, but alumnae can add comment to the forms. Recommendations do not guarantee anything. They are simply a “formal” introduction from an alumna to a chapter.
Make connections. Different schools have different rules about contact before recruitment. My daughter’s school has very strict rules regarding contact between potential new members and sorority members. Other schools allow contact right up until the start of recruitment. You can usually find the rules on the school’s Panhellenic website. Get the word out to friends and family that you will be participating in recruitment. You never know who might know a sorority member at a school. ***If you’re going to a larger southern school, you might need to set your Instagram account to “public” until rush is over. It’s a way for the girls in sororities to get to know you better.***
Start preparing your “rush bag.” I have a whole post about rush bags and what goes into them. “Rush bags” are handbags for potential new members to carry with them during the recruitment process. They contain necessities for hot days, rainy days, and wardrobe emergencies. My post even has links to lots of the needed items, so it makes your shopping easier. See it here.
Start thinking about wardrobe, including shoes. Most southern schools have published information about 2023 recruitment, or they will soon. Read it, and learn what you’ll need to wear for each day. At my daughter’s school, the first round is watching videos of the chapters. The girls are issued t-shirts to wear for the second round; they wear them with cute shorts or skorts/skirts…and I don’t mean “booty” shorts. Cute dressier shorts or a skirt will be perfect. They need dresses for the next round, and they need a dress for the preference round, but all of that is different at different schools! Keep that in mind! Do your homework! Make sure you have an extra dress or two, in case of spills or if you need options, Obviously, different schools have different styles…even across the south. What is popular at Baylor might not work at SMU or South Carolina. What works at Georgia might not work at TCU or Florida State. Look at sorority Instagrams. Look at the Instagram accounts of girls who go there; you will likely see some pictures that will help. Don’t wear anything skimpy or too tight. Fitted is fine; too tight is a no-no. Last year, for our daughter going to Bama, we looked at Zara and Amanda Uprichard. There are some cute Amanda Uprichard styles on Amazon. For shoes, our daughter took nice sneakers for the first two days and comfortable low-heeled, nude-colored wedges for other days, except a dressier pair of shoes for Preference Day. The goal is to wear tasteful, flattering dresses that are comfortable. You don’t want to be fidgeting with your clothes, and if you aren’t comfortable, it will show. ***Also, some chapters require girls to have simple white dresses for formal pledging soon after Bid Day. It’s a good idea to have one on hand, just in case! They often go on sale after July 4 at lots of stores.Simple, modest, not low-cut, covered shoulders preferred. My daughter wore the white romper below, and no one was the wiser.***Here are a few simple styles I saw on some girls during recruitment last year. But keep in mind, you need to get what’s right for YOU and what’s right for the climate and vibe at the school you are attending:
Amanda Uprichard Allora Dress, some colors offered at $85 at time of writing. Several colors availablehere.
Amanda Uprichard Fiori Dress, some sizes offered at $93 at time of writing. Purchase here.
*This is a romper simply because it has shorts built in underneath, but it does not show as a romper. It looks like a dress.*
Steve Madden Apparel Kianna Dress, $89. Click here.
These are a few things you can do to get prepared for the experience ahead of recruitment. It’s something most people will experience only once in their lives. Be prepared.
Recruitment can be a lot of fun. Be yourself, and be open-minded. Those are the two most important things. You got this!
***If you have suggestions you would like to add to the above, please leave a comment!***
I cannot possibly be the only person in the world who sometimes has to return items I have purchased. Sometimes, things don’t fit, or I’m disappointed with the quality of a product, and sometimes, I have several things to return at once. This happened to me yesterday. I had several pairs of shoes to return to a local store…three boxes. It’s difficult to juggle three shoe boxes walking into a retail establishment, so I used my trusted Hulken bag. (Amazon shopping link here.) It’s a tote bag (medium or large) on wheels! And it’s easy to use! Plus it folds! Y’all know I have mentioned the Hulken bag before for college move-in and move-out, but it occurred to me yesterday that the Hulken is the perfect Mother’s Day gift or Graduation gift! Every woman on the planet could use a Hulken bag to help return items, for grocery shopping, for bringing things to and from the car, for moving, for spring cleaning, for college laundry…seriously, I use mine all the time. Their slogan says it all: Schlepping made easy.
I have the medium Hulken bag that I purchased through Amazon, and my college student daughter has the large. The medium sells for $89,90, and the large sells for $104.90. The bags are offered in three colors: black, rose gold, and silver. They have smooth-rolling wheels that go in all directions, and they each carry up to 66 pounds! The handles are long and reinforced…one on each side for rolling the bag next to you, and one on the end for pulling the bag along. Plus, an added bonus is that they are lightweight and easy to fold and unfold, so they take up minimal space in your home or car. I only have one right now, but I’m getting myself another one, so I can keep one in the house and one in my car. You never know when you’ll need it! I normally recommend products, but I’m absolutely insisting you purchase a Hulken bag for the mom or graduate in your life.
You see the silver bags above. Black and rose gold are pictured below. You can purchase all colors and both sizes from Amazon here, but order now, because right now, they are estimating delivery between May 12 and May 17. The longer you wait, the later the delivery. Mother’s Day is May 14, so there is a chance you will receive it before the actual date. Mine arrived earlier than estimated, so fingers crossed. But if you’re purchasing a graduation gift, order now too, to ensure it arrives in time!
I simply cannot stress enough how much I love this product. This is a gift they will actually use!
My daughter attended an independent school in Charlotte from Transitional Kindergarten through 12th grade, and the former head of the school often had wise words to share. One of his favorite phrases? “Finish well.” As the end of each school year approached, I would remind our daughter, “Finish well!” Did she always hear me? She always finished pretty well, so maybe.
Now, the end of her freshman year of college is rapidly approaching. Like a train out of control, freshman year is moving forward at lightning speed. She will be home in less than a week. Less than a week! I find myself saying, “Finish well!”
We moved her into her dorm at the beginning of August. It was an exciting time. It was a scary time. Like lots of moms out there, I was excited for her to experience college, but I was nervous about leaving her 450 miles away. However, I remembered something I had read before:
Put the basket in the water.
I got that sentence from a piece written by Ashlei Woods. You can read it here. “Put the basket in the water” is a reference to the time of Moses, when midwives were ordered by Pharaoh to kill baby boys born to Israelites by drowning them in the Nile. Moses’s mother, in an effort to save her baby, placed him in a basket and placed the basket in the river, in hopes that he would live. I’m no Biblical scholar, but even I remember the story from Sunday School lessons. Moses did live, obviously, and went on to become a great prophet. I certainly don’t expect my daughter to become a great prophet, but I want her to live and become the best person she can be. I want her to live life. And by placing her proverbial basket in that proverbial river (college), I sent her on her way.
Has she learned things in college that will help her in her future endeavors? In short, yes. She has learned something in each class she has taken. She has learned about music, public relations, writing…so much. More importantly, she has learned more about who she is. She has learned how to make friends from lots of different places. She has learned how to handle medical emergencies and automobile situations. She has learned how to make doctor appointments and pick up her own prescriptions. And even though I always tried to expose her to as many new experiences as possible, she has been exposed to even more new experiences. She has learned to manage on her own. Sure, she still gets advice (sometimes wanted, sometimes not) from me, but she is doing it! We still support her financially, but she is doing it! We put the basket in the water, and we trusted God and trusted her.
Have there been hiccups along the way? Yes, but she has learned from each one. Last week, SpaceX launched a test rocket…the most powerful one ever launched. There was excitement surrounding it, but it failed. And afterward, Elon Musk, the founder of SpaceX, seemed happy in spite of the failure, saying they (the engineers, the company) would learn a lot from the failure. He was excited about what they would learn! Those words stuck with me, because this very successful man was reminding the world that we learn from failure. Don’t get me wrong. Our daughter’s hiccups, so far, haven’t been in the classroom. But any hiccups she has experienced along the way have been opportunities for learning. Learning what doesn’t work is how she will learn what does work.
In a few days, we will move our daughter out of her freshman dorm. As she finishes her freshman year, I will remind her several times, “Finish well.” I am already reminding her to start packing things up and cleaning out her room. And after we get her home for the summer, I feel sure we will notice she is a different girl than the one we sent to college in August. She is older. She is more confident. She is more independent. She is more knowledgable. As my own parents said when I came home after my freshman year, “We sent our daughter off to college and got a different person back.” They often joked that I was “switched at college.”
Kelly's Favorite Things 