Category / rush bag

by Kelly Mattei

My Favorite Everyday Jewelry

My favorite everyday jewelry. *As an Amazon Associate, I receive commission on items purchased through my links.*

I’m giving away some real secrets today!

This past weekend, I met a few friends from college for a weekend full of laughs, memories, drinks, food, and new memories! It’s always fun to get together with people I have known most of my life. I’m very fortunate to have maintained friendships with people I met in college 40 years ago. Did I mention we laugh a lot when we get together?!? Well, we do.

When I travel, whether I’m meeting friends for lunch or traveling, I like to keep the jewelry simple. That doesn’t mean I don’t wear pieces I love. I just like to have some things that will work with anything I wear, so I don’t have to take as much. Also, I find those same pieces are my “fall back” pieces when I’m in a hurry to get somewhere in Charlotte or when I can’t make a decision.

The best thing about them? They’re inexpensive! If I leave them behind somewhere, it’s no disaster. I also get lots of compliments on them. For those reasons and lots more, I highly recommend these pieces:

  • Earrings. Trendy CZ Gold Hoop Earrings for Women. These earrings come in lots of colors, but my favorites for traveling are the multicolor ones, simply for ease. They match everything. They’re not too big but not too small, and I receive countless compliments on them. Best of all? They are only $13.99! I have several pairs of the multicolor ones, and I also have them in pink, green, and blue. ***Also great earrings for sorority rush if you’re still wondering what to take/send/wear!***Purchase here.

  • Necklace. Again, a piece I receive countless compliments on, and again, inexpensive…only $7.99! It’s big enough to be noticed, but not big enough to be the only thing people see. Purchase here.

  • Bangle Bracelets. A trio of bangle bracelets for about $20. Sure, they’re costume jewelry, but they fill a need and dress up an ensemble! Get them here.

There you have it. Some of my best-kept secrets…divulged. Purchase while supplies last!

by Kelly Mattei

Amazon Prime Day Deals for Sorority Rush

Participating in sorority recruitment in the south this fall? Let’s get ready! Here are some deals from Amazon Prime Days that can help you during sorority “rush.”

  • Rush Bag. You’re going to need a bag to carry all your necessities on those hot days. And it’s hot in the south. I highly recommend a nylon bag with a zippered closure to keep your things dry during those inevitable afternoon showers. Get a great Prime Days deal here. It comes in seven colors, so pick one that’s probably easy to find when there’s a sea of bags. I highly recommend putting a luggage tag on it and maybe even an AirTag. I’ll provide links to both below.

  • Apple AirTags. Surely you’re familiar with the concept. Put an Apple AirTag in your bag so you can locate it with your iPhone’s “Find My” app. We have them in all our suitcases, and I have one in my wallet. I need to put one in my daughter’s wallet. I highly recommend you do the same for your college-age kids. Get a 4-pack of AirTags here. Personally, I would add AirTag holders. There’s a Prime Days Deal for that. Get four multicolored ones here. For my daughter’s keys, I got the Otterbox Rugged Airtag holder keychain. Purchase here.

  • Portable Charger. Because your daughter could be out and about all day, make sure she has a portable charger for her phone! Get a Prime Day deal on a great one at Amazon here.
  • Luggage Tag. You don’t need something fancy, but something bright-colored can help her find her rush bag when it’s in a pile. She definitely NEEDS a luggage tag to ID her bag. I highly recommend a colorful, inexpensive 10-pack, so she has extras to put on her real luggage, her school backpack, and more. Purchase here.

  • Mini Travel Umbrella. In the south, it can rain at any given time. Your daughter needs an umbrella that will fit in her Rush bag. I think her freshman roommate’s parents thought I was crazy when I gave the girls umbrellas, but they literally used them every day during rush.There are lots to choose from on Amazon. Get one with great reviews here.

  • Rechargeable Mini Fan. While this is not a Prime Days Deal, it’s inexpensive anyway. This is the one my daughter used. And it’s necessary on those sweltering August days in the south. Save your daughter some agony during recruitment. Get her a fan here.

  • Sharpies. They need to write their names on everything they own when they go to college, and all these things in their rush bags are not exceptions. You can check out the assortment of Sharpie products on Amazon here.

  • Comfy Shoes. Because recruitment goes on and on for days, the girls need to wear some comfortable shoes or slippers when they walk to and from the houses and between parties. They do not wear these into the parties. I recommend some comfortable flip-flops or slipper-type shoes. See some great ones here. Crocs also offers a wide variety of slip-on comfy shoes here.

  • Waterproof Changing Pad. Sounds silly, I know, but if they have to sit on the wet ground, they’ll thank you. Get one here.
  • Insulated Water Cup that closes securely. I know these girls love their Stanley and Yeti cups. If you need to purchase one, there’s a Stanley you can get with a Prime Day Deal here. There are lots of colors offered, but I could only find the one color on the deal. Yeti has one here.

What else will they need for their rush bags? You can see a previous post with links we made about it here. If you just want a quick list of the other things, here you go:

  • Hand sanitizer
  • Deodorant
  • Tissues
  • Breath Strips (no gum…nothing is uglier than someone chomping gum during a rush party)
  • Band Aids
  • Lip Gloss or balm
  • Blotting Papers
  • Small snacks
  • Safety pins
  • Feminine products
  • Painkillers like acetaminophen and ibuprofen and dose(s) of any necessary medications.

If you’d like to see previous posts we’ve made about sorority recruitment in the south, click here.

*Please share this information with anyone you know who is participating in sorority recruitment in the south! And feel free to send us a message if you have any questions about any of the above or anything else!

*We receive commissions on items purchased through our links.

by Kelly Mattei

Today’s Big Prime Day Deals

Today’s big Prime Day deals! Get them while they last! Limited quantities…

  • Baboon to the Moon Mini Go-Bag. It’s called “mini,” but at 32 liters, it’s not small. I use it as a carry-on for all flights. It’s durable, and it comes in lots of great colors. Carry it as a backpack or a duffle…its versatile. I have been using these bags for years, and every time I use it, at least one person asks me where they can get them. They’re a great deal anytime, but at 25% off? It’s a no-brainer. Makes a great gift for anyone. I love mine. My 21-yr-old daughter loves hers. My 79-yr-old aunt loves hers. Even my husband doesn’t mind carrying mine. I think it’s time to get him his own. This one is HIGHLY recommended. Several colors are on sale between $123 and $127. You won’t regret this purchase. Get one for $123.25 in red/black/orange/yellow/grey here. Or get a specialty color like Lime Breeze or Sunset Coral for under $127 here.

  • Nespresso VertuoPlus Coffee and Espresso Machine by De’Longhi with Milk Frother, Ink Black This is not something I ever thought would purchase, but our college-age daughter is home for the summer and had to have one. She will be taking it to her college apartment when summer is over. Get one now for 35% off during Amazon Prime Days with your Prime membership. I paid $219 for hers, but you can get it for $142.99 while supplies last. Purchase here.
  • Women’s Sandals Peep Toe Slides Chunky Heel Mules. Not gonna lie…these are some of my favorite “dupe” shoes this summer, and I bought them at full price in three colors! I’m going to get a few more while they’re on sale! I have white, black, nude, and hot pink, and I love them all. Right now, every color is $38.04 or less with your Prime membership. Get them here.

  • Away Bigger Carry-On Luggage, Lightweight Hardside Large Suitcase with Spinner Wheels, TSA Lock, Airline Approved. Y’all, Away Luggage is rarely discounted. If you’ve been wanting it, get it now. It’s great luggage and is backed up by a great warranty. Right now, you can get this bag for 20% off…almost unheard of! It makes a great holiday or birthday gift, so purchase here.

  • St.Tropez Self Tan Classic Bronzer Mousse Foam, Original Fake Tan Love a tan, but don’t have the time or want to sit in the sun? I swear by St Tropez self-tan products. Amazon Prime Days has a great deal on this product at 30% off, while supplies last. Get it here.


MORE DEALS TO COME! I’M WORKING AS FAST AS I CAN!

***As an Amazon Associate, I receive commissions on products purchased through my links.***

by Kelly Mattei

Sorority Rush Resumés

Sorority Rush Resumés.

Every year, between March and July, I see lots of resumés for girls who are planning to participate in recruitment at various schools throughout the south. And every year, I have to tell almost every young lady to add some information, so I’m going to tell you now what type of information needs to be included on the resumé for recruitment. *Also, keep in mind that old-school “rush packets” are not necessary these days. Most alumnae simply want a digital resumé (not all that paperwork!), because they will be submitting them online anyway.

In asking an alumna to write a recommendation, it’s OK for Mom to make initial contact, but the girl needs to do the “official” ask herself. The girl needs to communicate with the alumna directly via phone/text/email. Also, unless the alumna says “no thank you necessary,” it’s a great idea to follow up with a thank you note. Now, onto the resumé information:

First, keep the resumé to one page if at all possible. In fact, I always say, “Just find a way to make it happen. No one wants to flip pages. They should be able to glance at your resumé and see how awesome you are almost immediately.” There are great samples and templates all over the internet. You can purchase templates on Etsy.com or use the Canva templates. It’s not difficult. See some examples at Etsy here. ***If you have already submitted your multi-page resumé, do not panic. It’s not a big deal; it’s just more ideal if it’s one page.***

So what needs to be included? All of these things:

  • Full name along with the name you prefer to be called. For example, you could put “Mary Ann Jones (Mary)”
  • Full street address, including zip code (you’d be surprised at how many don’t include the zip code). If you want, you can add your dorm information for freshman year, but it’s not necessary.
  • Contact info: email address, cell phone number, and any social media accounts
  • Photo: include a headshot photo of yourself near the top of the resumé.
  • Education: This should include the name and city of the high school (or high schools) you attended. Also, include your year of graduation. THEN put the name of the college you will be attending and what your major is, if you know it.
  • GPA and test scores. It needs to be included. If you don’t put your test scores, they assume they are way lower than they probably are.
  • Family information: Parents’ names, colleges attended, and their Greek affiliations, if applicable.
  • Honors/Awards: This is where you list any and all honors you received in high school, beginning with the most significant! They can be school awards, awards from an athletic club sport, musical awards, theatrical awards…any awards. Remember to include Honor Roll (9,10,11,12), any honor societies, any all-conference or all-state athletic awards, and even any superlatives. If your classmates named you as “Most Likely to Succeed,” put it on the resumé! Add any award that makes you stand out! If you received an award from a volunteer organization for “Outstanding Volunteer,” put it on there.
  • Scholarships: List any scholarships you received for college. If you didn’t receive any, no big deal. Just don’t include the category on your resumé.
  • Leadership: List any leadership positions you have held during high school years. Captain of the volleyball team? Add it. Sunday School leader at church? Add it. Camp counselor? Add it. Secretary of student government? Add it. Swim lesson teacher or coach? Add it.
  • Activities: This is where you list your extracurricular activities…pretty self-explanatory. List any sports, clubs, or anything you are a member of.
  • Service: This is where you include information about your volunteer work during high school years. They like to see that you care about your community. Volunteered to coach little kids in soccer? Add it. Volunteered for Meals on Wheels? Add it. Get it?
  • Work Experience: Had a job? List it. Worked at a Christmas tree lot? Add it. Babysitting? List it. Sold items online for extra cash? If you were doing it as a job, you can count it. Add it.

If you haven’t built and distributed your resumé to alumnae who can write recommendations for you, do it today! It’s officially July! Get it done today! And remember: KEEP IT TO ONE PAGE!

by Kelly Mattei

Sorority Rush Prep Should Be Well Underway

Sorority rush prep should be well underway.

If your daughter is participating in sorority recruitment, especially in the south, you need to be knee deep in preparations by now. If not, it’s not too late, but get busy. I wrote a piece in February called Don’t Sweat Fall Sorority Rush Yet, and in it, I included a timeline of preparation. It’s almost mid-June…let’s gooooooooo! To read the piece I mentioned, click here.

In the piece, the timeline mentions the wardrobe in July. That is when it should be shored up and ready to go. Shop now for rush appropriate dresses. That means you don’t want to be too flashy, too skimpy, or too matronly. Most college-age girls know what is fashionable, but if you wouldn’t wear it in front of your boyfriend’s mother, don’t wear it for rush.

If you haven’t registered for rush or made any required videos, get busy. I’ve mentioned this before: don’t read a script for your video, but have some talking points, making sure you cover any prompts they have requested. Smile and be confident, and use good lighting!

Millions of young women have participated in recruitment over the years; you can do this!

Please send any questions, comments, or concerns. I love getting questions!

by Kelly Mattei

Links to Sorority Rush Posts

Several people have asked for links to some of my posts about sorority rush. Here are some from the past, and I’m sure I will have some new ones over the next few months. ***I am not a rush consultant.*** Please feel free to send me any questions you might have. I am always open to suggestions and ideas for new posts!

Links to sorority recruitment (rush) posts:

  • Sorority Rush Preparation in the South, click here.
  • Sorority Rush Bags, click here.
  • Moms and Sorority Rush, click here.
  • Sorority Rush: Last Minute Items, click here.
  • Sorority Rush Conversations, click here.
  • OK, Moms, It’s Sorority Rush Time, click here.
  • When Sorority Rush is Over, click here.
by Kelly Mattei

Don’t Sweat Fall Sorority Rush Yet

Don’t sweat fall sorority rush yet.

I have received three phone calls from worried friends this week. Their daughters are planning to participate in sorority rush in the fall at big southern schools, and they are worried they should be working on “rush stuff” right now. No. The answer is no. Let your daughter enjoy her senior year!

Mom, you can start thinking about the preparation, but there’s no need to be consumed by it. What can you do now? Look up which sororities have chapters at your daughter’s school. Start thinking of your friends who know your daughter; which ones were in sororities in college and would be willing and able to write recommendations for your daughter? Make a list in the notes on your phone. Or you can do like one of my friends and make a spreadsheet. I’m not Type A, so a spreadsheet was not my thing. I just made a list. Anytime you’re out and about and hear that someone is a member or alumna of a sorority, make a note of it in your phone.

If you’re thinking about hiring a rush consultant, that’s entirely up to you. We didn’t hire one for my daughter when she rushed, and she landed exactly where she wanted to be. I have lots of friends who have daughters who have rushed, and personally, I don’t know anyone who hired a consultant. And all my friends have daughters who are very happy with their rush choices. The hiring of a consultant is a personal choice.

Seriously, right now, just start compiling your recommendation list and having your daughter start working on her resumé. The girls cannot even make a complete resumé right now, because they don’t know what they’ll have to add before the end of the school year.

In May, have your daughter contact your friends who are sorority alumnae by phone, text, or email to ask them to write recommendations for her. This is something she needs to do herself, and she needs to ask people who actually know her. In a pinch, she can ask a friend of a friend. Recommendations are basically introductions of your daughter to the chapters, so she will want them to be able to write about her from personal knowledge. For example, when my neighbor’s daughter participated in “recruitment,” I was able to write a detailed recommendation/introduction of her, because I had first-hand knowledge of her personality and great attributes. Try to get recommendations to every chapter, and whatever you do, make sure your daughter does not say to any alumnae, “I’m only interested in sororities A, B, and C.” First, it sounds bad. Secondly, until rush begins, your daughter might think she knows what she likes, but she might change her mind. She also might not get invited to the ones she think she will.

You can start looking at dresses if you like. Spring dresses are coming out now, so it’s perfectly fine to start looking and even purchasing dresses she thinks she will wear. When shopping, look for fairly conservative dresses but not too conservative. Amanda Uprichard offers some great options at amandauprichard.com.

But right now, the main thing is to have rush in the back of your mind. Keep you ears and eyes open for people who can help with recommendations. Soak up every moment of senior year of high school, and enjoy having your daughter at home with you!

Here’s a rough timeline of preparation:

  • January-April: Find out which sororities have chapters on campus. Also, make a list/spreadsheet of sorority alumni who can write recommendations for your daughter. ***ALSO, make sure your daughter cleans up her social media…no alcohol or extreme photos.***
  • March-May: watch the university’s Panhellenic website to find out when registration is. At most southern universities, you can register for fall rush starting in May.
  • May-June: Your daughter can contact sorority alumni and ask for recommendations, telling them they will send their resumé soon.
  • June: create a resumé using the Canva app or another app. Distribute the resumé to the alumni who have agreed to write recommendations. Most sororities want digital recommendations now, so please don’t do old school “rush packets.” If you don’t know what that is, don’t worry about it…you don’t need to know.
  • July: make sure you have your rush wardrobe, and finish gathering everything for the “rush bag.” For more information on the rush bag, click here.
  • Late July/August: move her into her dorm and let the magic happen!

I will have posts later in the spring and summer with more information.

Mostly, relax. Don’t let your daughter get nervous about it.

***Over the next few days, I will be re-posting some posts about rush and preparation for it.***

by Kelly Mattei

Holiday Gifts for *Future* College Students

Holiday gifts for future college students.

If you know someone who will be off to college in the fall (or even in January), there are lots of gift options for them! A friend contacted me yesterday, asking me to compile a shopping list for those future college students. Knowing someone is going off to college can help make your holiday shopping easier, and you can help them prepare for what is ahead of them! First, you can check out my post about Holiday Gifts for College Students here. That post, however, doesn’t include a lot of the things they will need for a dorm as a freshman. Here are some ideas:

  • Laundry bags. If they’re living in a dorm, they’ll likely need to go down the hall or even to another floor to do laundry. Easiest way to transport that? A laundry backpack. Get a great one here.
  • Rush bag. If a girl on your list will be participating in sorority recruitment in January or in the fall, it’s OK for her to start preparing. A Rush bag is a necessity in the south. They can carry all the little things they’ll need between recruitment “parties.” The best bags are water resistant and have zipper closures. I found a great one at Amazon here. Add a bright-colored luggage tag, making her bag easy to identify here. To read more about what you can put into the bag for the future rushee, see my post about rush bags here.
  • Over the door hanging organizer. I was in a friend’s daughter’s room recently and noticed that she keeps all her jewelry in an over-door hanging organizer. What an awesome idea! The pockets are clear, so she can see each piece without even taking it out of the pocket, making it easy to find what she needs/wants. Purchase here.

  • Laundry cart. One of the greatest things ever, the Rubbermaid rolling laundry cart gets all kinds of jobs done, including moving into and out of dorm rooms! We also use one for pool towels, and anytime I have a lot of stuff to move around the house, I’ll use it. It’s commercial-grade and awesome. Our daughter is a sophomore, and when she moved into the sorority house this past fall, this is what the movers used to haul her stuff into the room. You might think you’ll only need it once, but since we got one, we use it all the time around the house. In fact, I really need one upstairs and one downstairs. Your future student will use it for moving, and will use it for gatherings…taking lots of things to parties. It folds when not in use. Get it here.
  • Moving bags. You’ve seen me recommend these many times. They’re sturdy and make moving easier. They can pack a lot of stuff in these bags. They can even use them for storage in a dorm room! Get them here.

  • Cosmetics organizer. College girls need cosmetics organizers, as their vanity space is usually pretty limited. My daughter preferred an acrylic one. Purchase it here.
  • Basketball. Lots of boys and even lots of girls will want to have a basketball on hand for pickup games, but make sure it’s an indoor/outdoor ball. For a good one at a great price, click here.
  • Light up basketball. For an extra gimmick or for courts where there are no lights, a light up basketball can be a lot of fun! Get one here.

  • Sunset lamp. My daughter had one freshman year, and loved it. They’re fun in dorms. Get one here.
  • Disco ball light. Much like the sunset lamp, these tend to be popular in freshman girl dorms. Get one here.
  • Trinket tray. For the little things on the nightstand. Boys and girls need these. I found one that is acrylic, so it won’t break easily, and the price is right. See it here.
  • Portable speaker. I cannot emphasize this enough. They need a portable bluetooth speaker. Get the JBL Flip 6 (the latest model) here. Or save a little money and get the Flip 5 (a slightly older model) here.

  • Yeti trunk/lockbox. A Yeti Go Box is a great place to store items in a dorm room or anywhere. It can also be used for camping trips. They come in three sizes, and while they’re not inexpensive, they’re built to last. Attach a lock, and you can secure valuables. See them here.

  • Yeti cooler. Since we’re talking about Yeti brand, we have to discuss coolers for college students. College boys need coolers, and they love the durability and quality of Yeti. It’s not so important for girls, but it’s important for boys. They are offered in lots of colors and sizes. Check out the Yeti cooler offerings here.
  • Keurig Coffee Maker. College students love coffee, but parents (like me) don’t like seeing charges at various coffee shops. Therefore, a Keurig single cup coffee maker is a great gift for a future college student. There are lots of different ones, but right (at writing), you can get a single cup Keurig coffee maker with a 36 ounce reservoir for just $50. Hurry. Get it here.

There you have it. Fifteen excellent gift ideas for ***future*** college students.

Happy Holiday Shopping!

by Kelly Mattei

Shopbop on Amazon

Shopbop on Amazon.

I love Shopbop. I have been shopping with Shopbop for years, and a few years ago, I was lucky enough to stumble upon a Shopbop pop-up shop in New York! “Shopbop pop-up shop”…wow, that’s a lot of bops and pops.

Until recently, though, I didn’t know I could shop Shopbop through Amazon to take advantage of my Amazon Prime benefits...free shipping and easy, peasy, Amazon returns! It’s true! Shopbop has an Amazon shop! You can see it and shop it here.

If you’re a fan of Shopbop already, you know how awesome their offerings are. If you’re not a fan of Shopbop, it’s high time you became one. They have the latest styles in apparel, beauty, and accessories from brands at lots of different price points, and they have great sales too! They even have a section of “under $200 fashion finds”! All of it…all of it…is listed on their Amazon site!

Need a dress for an upcoming event? Shopbop. Need something to wear to an athletic event? Shopbop. Want to freshen your wardrobe? Shopbop. Just want to surprise your college-age daughter with a new bracelet or handbag? Shopbop.

Check it all out here. And if you’re still looking for some dresses for sorority recruitment, check out their sales section for dresses like those shown below!

Happy Shopping!

by Kelly Mattei

OK, Moms, It’s Sorority Rush Time

OK, moms, it’s sorority rush time!

Sorority rush (also known as recruitment) is getting underway at big schools all over the south. A couple of places have already finished, but lots are just getting started. I remember it well from last year, when our daughter participated in recruitment. Is it fun for the girls? For the most part, yes. Is it stressful for the girls? Sometimes, yes. But I discovered last year that it might be more stressful for the moms. It’s true.

First, let me say that most big, southern schools employ a method that ensures the greatest number of matches. Therefore, at most big schools in the south, the attrition rate during recruitment is relatively low, and girls dropping out on their own account for a large percentage of the attrition. For example, at one large southern school I’m familiar with, about 92% of the girls finish the process with a bid(invitation to join) from a sorority. Of the other 8%, most are people who dropped out on their own. Some had GPAs that didn’t meet the chapters’ requirements. It’s not like it was back in the 80s or even the 90s…girls aren’t just getting dropped left and right, all willy nilly, and at this particular school, no one gets dropped after Preference round, which is the last night of recruitment. If you make it to Preference, you are guaranteed a bid somewhere.

With that out of the way, let’s talk about how Mom feels during the process. Mom, you might feel stressed. You might feel numb. You might feel out-of-the-loop. You might feel helpless. And all of that is OK. You feel what you feel. It’s hard to be away from your daughter when she is going through something stressful. I was talking with a friend earlier, and we discussed what we would put in a Mom’s rush bag, if there were such a thing. Maybe you’ll want to create one from this list? You can keep it next to your favorite chair:

  • Aromatherapy Shower Steamers. Make your shower/bathroom feel like a spa with scents like lavender, rose, mint, and more! It’s relaxing. See them here.
  • Olly Sleep. If you’re having trouble sleeping, maybe some melatonin will help. I love Olly Sleep gummies. Check with your doctor before taking supplements. Purchase here.
  • Bath Pillow. A hot bath can be very relaxing, but only if you’re comfortable in your tub. A bath pillow can make a big difference. Get it from Amazon here.
  • Easy read. Throw yourself into a good book. If you want to read an easy-to-read novel about rush, there’s Rush by Lisa Patton at Amazon here.
  • Relaxing Face Mask. Forcing yourself to relax with a face mask is a great thing. I prefer ones containing lavender, but you might like others. Choose one here.
  • Favorite healthy snacks. I think every mom needs to have some healthy snacks handy, but especially when times are stressful. Drop some of your faves in your “mom rush bag.”

Last year, I had several friends whose daughters were participating in recruitment at the same time mine was. We would talk, and often, we had different stories to share. We didn’t tell each other which houses/chapters our daughters were visiting, but we did share anecdotes…like when one of our daughters almost walked out of her dorm and to a sorority houses wearing two different shoes. Another girl sat in gum between parties. We all shared some laughs, but if one mom cried, we all cried. If one mom was being particularly funny, we all laughed. Thank God we had each other to lean on.

The recruitment process is not easy. There’s so much anxiety…daily anxiety. Add in the pure exhaustion that comes from walking from house to house in summer heat. Add in the emotional exhaustion. It’s a lot. Plus, many of the girls are away from home for the first time.

But here’s one thing to remember when talking to your daughter:

Never let her see you sweat.

If your daughter calls you crying, resist the urge to jump into the pool of tears with her. It’s easy to dive right in there, but your daughter needs you to be strong for her. She needs you to be the voice of reason. Personally, at our house, if I can hold myself together, everyone else does too. So remember that if your daughter calls you crying one morning after receiving her invitations for a round, saying she got dropped by her very favorite house. Let her cry for a minute, but remind her that she needs to dry up those tears and put on a happy face for the next house. She needs to be reminded that the chapters that kept her really want her…they kept her for a reason. She needs to keep moving forward, and you might have to encourage her to do it. Tell her to take a deep breath and “pivot.” She’s going to be OK. (And you are too, Mom.) It might seem like her world is collapsing right now, but it’s not. This is just a blip on the radar. Remind her there are great girls in every chapter; it’s true.

There will be some girls who simply decide sorority life is not for them. Or maybe they just hate the process. Or maybe they have had enough. Whatever the reason, it’s OK to drop out of recruitment, but only after giving it a real effort. Don’t drop out on a whim. And if your daughter simply needs to drop out, you need to assure her that she has to make the best decision for herself.

As for maintaining your own sanity, a glass of wine could be your friend! Or some exercise. Or some sunshine. You got this, Mom.