Fun Holiday Cocktails for New Year’s Eve

Fun holiday cocktails for New Year’s Eve.

I’m 56 years old. The last thing I want to do for New Year’s Eve is go to a big party with lots of people. Like many people my age, I want to visit with good friends, enjoy a good dinner, and drink a few cocktails before returning home to watch New Year’s Rocking Eve on TV from the safety of my own bedroom. This year, we have a big party to go to on the 30th, so I will be all “partied out” after that. Just give me comfy clothes, good friends, and fun cocktails. I will be happy.

In the past few days, I have looked up recipes for some good, easy cocktails, and I’m sharing them with you now.

  • Sugar Cookie Martini. This is a personal favorite! It tastes like a traditional sugar cookie, but not quite as sweet, and that a good thing, in my opinion. If vanilla vodka is difficult to find, I recommend Pinnacle Whipped Vodka or Pinnacle Cake Vodka…both good substitutes. See the recipe here.
Sugar Cookie Martini photo from Wholefully.com

  • Mistletoe Margarita. I had one of these recently at a friend’s house, and I highly recommend! A little tart like a regular margarita, but with a merrier taste! See the recipe here.
Mistletoe Margarita photo from Delish.com

  • Poinsettia Champagne Cocktail. This is a personal favorite…for the ease, and because I love champagne cocktails. However, I usually substitute Prosecco for the Champagne, simply because of personal preference. For a non-alcoholic version, you can always substitute white sparkling grape juice. See the recipe here.
Poinsettia Champagne Cocktail from thespruceeats.com
  • More cocktails. The ones listed above are my personal faves, but there are lots more out there. I also love Bailey’s on the rocks…super simple, and even soothing! But to see more holiday cocktail ideas, click here. You can get great ideas for cocktails to prepare ahead in a pitcher.

I hope you all plan to enjoy the remainder of the holiday season as much as I do! On Christmas Day, we had some friends over and tried a few of these different cocktails…all were a big hit! And if you want to do something different, maybe try Drunken Cherries! We made batches of them! You’ll need to start them at least 24 hours in advance, but they are super easy, super good…and boozy, so don’t let children have them under any circumstances! See the recipe here. (We used Pinnacle Whipped Vodka and Pinnacle Cake Vodka. We also used melted Andes Mints on some of them for a twist on the flavor!)

Happy Holidays!

Remember, be safe…don’t drink and drive.

Holiday Gifts for the Home

Holiday gifts for the home.

Lots of us love gifts for the home. I love when someone gives me something I can use or display at home. Therefore, I’m sharing some favorite ideas for 2023:

  • Vietri Vase. Y’all, I love Vietri glassware, and their vases are my very favorite. They add a little beauty and color to any room. Your friends/family would love to receive a Vietri vase. My fave is the Vietri Hibiscus mouth blown glass vase, starting at $65 for the small clear version and $69 for various colors…the cobalt, the dark green, the pink…I love them all! Purchase here.
  • Ice Ball Maker. This is great for the person on your gift who loves a good cocktail on the rocks. Or if they like a good Old Fashioned, they will love being able to make their own ice balls to perfectly chill their cocktails. Get this thoughtful gift for just $16.99 at Amazon here.
  • EXVALO nightlight/charger/speaker. This is an unusual gift I would love to receive! An adjustable bedside nightlight with phone charging capabilities and a Bluetooth speaker. It’s portable and rechargeable! In fact, I think we need one on every nightstand in our house. Priced at just $35.99 right now (on sale 40% off!), it’s a great gift for anyone on your list. Get it here.
  • Frozen Beverage Machine. I want a frozen drink machine at home. I did a little investigating, and I found that the Margaritaville brand gets great reviews and is priced right too! It’s not commercial grade. For that, you’ll spend more, but for a home machine, Margaritaville gets great reviews. It’s still $320 (at time of writing). If you have someone in on your list who likes to entertain with frozen margaritas, daquiris, or anything, else, this could be a great gift. The Margaritaville brand makes 2.5 pitchers at a time. Purchase here. If you’re up for commercial-grade, I recommend VEVOR brand. Prices start at $542 for the slushie maker on Amazon. What I really like about VEVOR is that no pitcher is required. You can dispense the beverage straight from the machine. I love it. . See the various VEVOR options here.
  • Garden Potting Bench. Have someone on your list who loves gardening? Me. I’m the one on the list who loves gardening. My husband knows I would be happy to receive a potting bench for Christmas. I found one from Yaheetech on Amazon that I would love, and priced at under $70, it’s a deal. There is some assembly required, but according to reviews, it’s pretty easy. If you have a gardener on your list, this could be a great gift at a great price. They’ll never suspect it’s under $70. Get it here.
  • Double Stitch by Bedsure Throw Blankets. Who doesn’t love a good throw blanket? Double Stitch by Bedsure makes quality blankets at great prices. Add a splash of modern charm to any room with these blankets, priced right now on sale at Amazon for $59.99. Get one for each person on your list! See them here.
  • Hippo Resin Figurine Dish. Y’all are going to think I’m crazy, but I love this hippo figurine that also acts as a bowl for keys, candy, whatever you want. It will be a conversation piece, for sure! Priced at $30.99, it’s a fun gift that will get noticed Christmas morning! Get it here.
  • Jonathan Adler Greek Key Frame. I love Jonathan Adler products for their modern look and for their whimsy. This one isn’t as whimsical as some, but it’s a great frame. Pop in a favorite photo for the recipient and wrap it up. Photo memories make great gifts. See it here.
  • Birdfeeder. The older I get, the more I remind myself of my mother. During summer, I enjoy watching the birds flock to my garden, but during the winter, they need to eat too! I’m adding a “birdfeeder” to my Christmas list this year. Hopefully, my husband will read this and come through. Otherwise, I’ll have to rely on Santa. There’s a great one at Amazon for $17.99 here.
  • Great Escapes Coffee Table Book. I’m a big fan of coffee table books. They add color a room and tell visitors a little bit about the residents. Have a traveler on your list? They might like a Great Escapes Coffee Table Book. My favorite right now? The Great Escapes USA: The Hotel Book. Priced under $50, it makes a lovely gift for the traveler on your list. Get it here.

There you have it…ten home gift ideas for the holidays. I’ll be following up with more ideas until Christmas.

Happy Shopping!

***As an Amazon Affiliate, I might receive commission on items purchased through my links.

College Cocktail Dresses, Part 3

College Cocktail Dresses, Part 3.

Here’s the third installment of the series, featuring cocktail dresses for college students. This one features ten dresses of varying lengths, colors, styles, and prices. Let’s go shopping! If you haven’t found anything yet, don’t fret! There will be more coming tomorrow! (I need to watch football today.)

  • L’Idee Gala Mini. Want a different color? Try this dress in Sunset! Regularly priced at $350, this one is on sale for $123! Very popular style. See it here.
  • Show Me Your Mumu Jasmine Dress. A popular halter-style dress that comes in lots of colors and is priced under $150. See yellow and pink here. See it in black here. Ivory here. And a lovely bellini color here.
  • NBD Lila Gown. This full-length dress also comes in several colors. See it in champagne ($122) here. Mauve pink ($194) here. Or navy ($228) here.
  • Blaine Mini Dress. This one is a steal at $30! Long sleeves, ruching, mini. Get it in red or teal here. Great for fall or holiday!
  • Montrose Mini. This one is offered in glorious purple or pink. At $111, you almost have to get it. See it here. I could totally see my daughter in the purple.
  • Kerrie Deep V Mini. Priced at just $70, this dress comes in pink or green. Super cute! See it here.
  • Joyce Mini Dress. This cheetah print, long sleeve number is on final sale for $42 (orig $168) at Revolve. See it here.
  • Amelia Gown. This black, full-length gown is beautiful and on sale for $153! See it here.
  • Old Money Gown. With a plunging neckline and tiered skirt, this black gown is simply gorgeous. Originally $325, it’s on sale now for $195. Purchase here.
  • Lovers and Friends Lazo Gown. This one is on sale for $188. It’s red, and it’s dramatic. Purchase here.

Happy Shopping! Come back tomorrow for more suggestions!

College Cocktail Dresses, Part 2

College Cocktail Dresses, Part 2.

Y’all seemed to have liked the first part of this “series,” so I wanted to get the second part out there quickly! More college cocktail dresses! As I mentioned before, I am featuring dresses I have seen college girls wear over the last year, and I’m trying to pick dresses I think they would wear. I’m also trying to keep the price point down, because we all know that, because of social media, our girls only want to wear a cocktail dress once. After they post a picture in a dress, they can’t post another picture in the same dress!

So here we go…more cocktail dresses!

  • Amanda Uprichard Arial Gown. This full-length gown is offered in several colors at different prices, but the blush one is $193…a great price for Amanda Uprichard. Also offered in pink, black, thyme, and fire…all at different prices. Purchase here. The fire version is $251 and can be seen here.
  • Amanda Uprichard Joanne Dress. This one is a winner. Its a style I have seen several times and seems to flatter almost everyone. Priced at $104, it’s a deal. The color is great too. Purchase here.
  • Lovers and Friends Poppy Mini. This one is priced higher at $269 (reg $359), but it’s a dazzling long-sleeve number in navy. Check it out here.
  • Superdown Sophie Draped Long Sleeve Mini. Offered in eight colors with prices starting as low as $32 for the Kelly Green version. See it here.
  • Indah Anjeli Maxi. Priced at $145, this maxi is a lovely fuschia with a deep-V neckline. Purchase here.
  • Superdown Harlow Mini. Definitely a mini, this is offered in red, pink, green, or white, starting at $68 here. Or see it in black here.
  • Song of Style Tucker Mini. This long-sleeve shimmering mini is glorious! My daughter wore it once, and she loved it. Priced at just $107, she’ll look like a million bucks! See it here.
  • Show Me Your Mumu Shimmy Mini. This black sequined dress has one shoulder with one long sleeve, so it’s different. Priced at $134. Purchase here.
  • BCBGeneration One Shoulder Cut Out Dress. Slightly conservative, this one is priced right at $44! See it here.
  • Michael Costello Cecelia Gown. Starting at $149 for the pink version, this dress is also offered in white and black for $177. It’s a gown that’s great for the tall girls out there! See it here.

More to come! Part 3 will be out with more dresses within 24 hours!

Making Memories

Making memories.

Yesterday, my daughter and I returned home from a trip to the Bahamas. We went with my college friend and her daughter. Our daughters were born about 17 months apart; her daughter is 21, and mine is almost 20. Our girls go to the same college and have been friends since they were born, but it had been a while since we had vacationed together. It was time to make new memories.

And we did.

Our friends flew out of Atlanta, and we flew out of Charlotte, so we all met at the hotel. My daughter and I arrived several hours late, but it was fine, because we got there safely, and we got there in time for dinner.

We had all sorts of plans for making special memories. We just knew we would celebrate our birthdays each night at the different restaurants where we had reservations. We thought we would likely spend some time on the beach drinking cocktails out of coconuts or pineapples. Oh, we had plans…but we were flexible.

And nothing happened the way we thought it would. In fact, the things we are most likely to remember were completely unplanned…just like always. Sure, we enjoyed our planned dinner on the first night. We even celebrated my friend’s daughter’s birthday. We also overate, so when the staff came out singing Happy Birthday, we didn’t even want dessert. We enjoyed the fountain light show. We spent time in the casino. We made new friends. Lots of the time, the girls did their own thing while we (the moms) just lounged by/in the pool all day. At 56, I’m just not good about baking in the sun for hours in tropical weather. Give me a cocktail and a pool instead…so that’s where we spent our days. The girls found a more “happening” pool (no old people!) to spend their days, and we were so glad they were having fun and making memories together.

We canceled two of our dinner reservations, because the girls made other plans. We (the moms) didn’t mind one bit. And on the last full day, the girls hung out with us in our pool cabana and in the pool. I think they were tired from the day before. We made some great memories laughing in the pool and chatting over cocktails with our girls, since they are both of legal drinking age in the Bahamas.

But the funniest memory we made on the whole trip was completely unplanned…and it was a doozy! In fact, I’m guessing I don’t know many people who can say they share this memory. Lots of people can say they have visited the Bahamas. Lots of people can say they dined at the restaurants and spent time in the casinos. Lots of people can say they met interesting people on vacation. Lots of people can say they got lots of rest or stayed out all night.

How many people can say their taxi ran out of gas on the way back to the airport in Nassau?

Well, we can! We hopped in a cab at the resort, and about five minutes later, the car swerved a little. Then it swerved again. I looked at my daughter, who was sitting next to me in the back seat. She looked confused too. And then our taxi driver said, “I think we are having a fuel problem.” A fuel problem? Like running out of gas?!?! Yep…she got us off the road just in time to run out of gas. The driver hopped out and started trying to flag down other cars, and my friend’s daughter looked at the dash. She said, “All the lights on the dash are on! Should we get out of the car? Or does that just mean we ran out of gas? Is that what happens when you run out of gas?” I replied, “I don’t know! I’ve never run out of gas!” We all laughed. My brain was working, and I knew, if all else failed, I could call my friend who works at the Nassau airport, and she could send a taxi for us, but our driver flagged one down pretty quickly. Crisis averted.

We got out of the taxi and loaded our bags in the other taxi, and we were on our way. The original taxi driver was with us, and she was apologizing profusely. I told her not to worry…we had just made a new memory!

And you know what? It’s true. We will likely remember running out of gas on the way to the airport for the rest of our lives.

Sometimes, a minor crisis becomes a funny memory, and that’s what happened here.

Canned Cocktails

Canned cocktails.

This past weekend, I had cocktails with a friend and her husband. My friend’s husband asked me what I was drinking, and when I told him I was having Tito’s and soda with lime, he asked me if I had tried High Noon..

High Noon? When I told him I had no idea what he was talking about, he explained, “It’s vodka and soda in a can.” He then went on to tell me that it’s so popular that stores have trouble keeping it in stock. Wow! It must be good! And now that I know it’s hard to find, I have a mission! I’m one of those people who loves a good challenge…and now my challenge is to find High Noon somewhere in the Charlotte area.

And that conversation made me think about other canned cocktails I’ve heard about recently. The whole “cocktails in a can” thing is a new to me. I know people have been drinking “hard seltzer” for a while, and maybe there have been others out there for a while. I’ve tried “hard seltzer,” and it’s definitely not for me. Lots of folks love them, I know, but Im not one of those people. So now I’m looking for different canned cocktails to try, and here are some I have found:

Jim Beam Cola. This is one I’ve actually tried. When I was at the beach at the end of July, my friend purchased some of these. We chilled them and decided to try them before dinner. As soon as I took my first sip, I said to her, “Holy smokes! It tastes like a college football game!” She laughed and agreed. We went to college together in the 80s, and back in the day, we would sneak bottles or flasks of bourbon into the stadium to mix with sodas purchased at the game. Often we mixed it with Coca Cola, because that’s what was being sold by vendors walking through the stands. I could drink all that sweetness when I was in college, but no more. If you’re into sugary cocktails, this one might be for you. Or maybe if you just want to think about football games. See the website here.

Spa Girl Vodka Cocktails. This is one I want to try soon. Spa Girl offers flavored vodka canned cocktails with only 48 calories per serving! Honestly, though, I can’t tell exactly what these are. Do you drink them straight from the can? It just says “flavored vodka,” but I’m guessing there is club soda in there too (maybe?), because it’s only 33 proof. No self-respecting vodka would be just 16.5 percent alcohol, so I’m guessing it’s mixed with soda in the can. They offer three flavors: cucumber, pear, and peach. I really want to try the peach flavor. The website offers some great-looking recipes too…you can see that here.

Bartles and Jaymes Premium Wine Coolers. OK, this one takes me back…straight to the 80s. When I was young, I enjoyed Bartles and Jaymes Wine Coolers. It was an easy way to have a lighter drink. I haven’t had them in years, but now that I know they are making them, I’m excited to try them again. Back in “the day,” they only came in bottles, but now that they come in cans, you can drink them at more places. No one wants to take bottles anywhere, and often, they aren’t allowed around pools or beaches. Sure, we will be moving into fall soon, but I live in the south, so we likely can keep sitting by the pool through September…and maybe into October. I hope to get some of these and share them with my neighbor by the pool this week. See the website here.

And there are more! Bluemarble offers a Bloody Mary in a can! Who knew? Conniption American Dry offers a canned Gin & Tonic…I have a friend who will be happy to hear that! And Malibu (the rum company) is now offering Malibu Smash canned cocktails…doesn’t a passion fruit and coconut rum cocktail sound fabulous??? Sign me up!

While some things about life seem to get more and more difficult (wearing masks everywhere we go, social distancing, more traffic everywhere we go), at least our cocktails are becoming easier! We don’t even have to mix them anymore!

BYOB and meet me by the pool!

Blame It On the Limoncello

Blame it on the limoncello.

After I posted my piece titled Please Drop In, I received a text from a friend telling me she was on the way to my house. This particular friend is funny…hilariously funny…and smart…put those two qualities together, and it makes for an awesome person. In fact, she’s so awesome that, years ago, when she told me she had “people” (that’s Southern for family) in Clanton, Alabama, I told her we absolutely must be related. I have family all over Alabama, so anything’s possible, right? Rather than digging through genealogy, I just went ahead and declared her my cousin. So, now we’re cousins. I’ve written about my “fake cousins” before. I don’t have a lot of them, but when I feel a particular kinship with someone…well, they become my fake cousin. So…when she said she was on her way to my house, I was thrilled!

A few minutes later, she drove up my driveway in her beautiful white convertible, and when she hopped out, she had a bag in her hand. Here’s what it contained: two cups of ice, a bottle of vodka, a bottle of Limoncello, a bottle of Diet Sprite, and some lemon juice. That’s a party in a bag! And yes! As you see…she even brought cups of ice! This cousin was prepared!

I have to admit that when I saw the bottle of limoncello, I got a little scared. I had an unforgettable experience with limoncello several months ago. You’d think at 53, I’d know what not to do where alcohol is concerned, but apparently, I’m not the fastest learner. A friend invited me to go with her to see Kathleen Turner perform in her one-woman show in Greenville, South Carolina. Because I’m a control freak, I offered to drive us there. We made an early dinner reservation for 5:30 or 6:00 at a restaurant near the theater, and we hit the road, arriving at the restaurant at about 5pm. The bar was open, but the restaurant wasn’t open yet, so we bellied up to the bar. My friend ordered an Old-Fashioned, and I ordered a glass of Prosecco. Well, one glass turned into two…never a big deal, because we wouldn’t be getting into the car for hours. But then, the bartender offered us some homemade Limoncello.

Has anyone ever told you how dangerous Limoncello can be? Well, I drank what he poured me, and when I stood up to go to the ladies room, I knew immediately that I was a little drunk. Yes, at 53, I was accidentally drunk before dinner. Fortunately, when I returned from the ladies’ room, our table was ready, so we could go straight to our table and order dinner. After dinner, I was feeling better, and we walked in the cool, brisk air to the theater. The show was great, and we joined some friends of my friend for “drinks” afterward…I just had coffee, thank you very much. By the time we left, it had been six hours since we moved from the bar to our table, and I was sobered up. I had a terrible headache, but I was sober.

The day after that little jaunt to Greenville, I was talking with another friend who said she’d had a limoncello experience too, and she reminded me of a time Danny Devito appeared drunk on The View. Later, he blamed his slurred speech and unsteady gate on the limoncello he’d been drinking, saying, “I knew it was the last seven limoncellos that was going to get me.” Since then, whenever something goes awry in my world, I say, “Blame it on the limoncello.”

But last week, my cousin who dropped in assured me no bad behavior was on the horizon. She assured me we were going to have one very light afternoon cocktail. And I watched intently as she mixed a lovely, summery-tasting concoction using all the ingredients she brought with her. And it was delicious! It tasted like sunshine!

All this was my long way of saying a great big “thank you” to my cousin for dropping in with the perfect treat in hand. Even better, she brought her infectious sense of humor and optimism…just when I needed it most! This whole pandemic has cancelled some of my vacations, and she knew I had the blues. But she cured that! I hope she’ll drop in again soon…or maybe I’ll drop in on her!

Blame it on the limoncello!

 

Welcome to the Jungle

Welcome to the jungle.

Yesterday, a friend posted on Facebook that when she was watching NBC’s Today, a woman complained that her best friend had just purchased a new home with a pool, and it made her “feel bad to see the pictures of their family enjoying this pool while she was stuck inside.” Apparently, the hosts told her she should confront her friend about how the photos made her feel. What the what?!?!? Confront her friend because she is envious?!?!?! Are you kidding me??? During the whole isolation thing, weren’t we all just trying to make the best of a bad situation? Weren’t we all just trying to hold it all together? In fact, aren’t we still trying to find happiness where we are? I like to think that if I lived in an apartment in New York, I would have tried to find ways to make my little space a little happier for me and my family. We all make choices in life. We can choose to find happiness.

During the isolation, our little family was very thankful we had a nice backyard and a pool. In fact, if you venture into our backyard right now, you can tell that’s where we spent all our time. When the isolation started, we started sitting on our patio during the evenings. We couldn’t go anywhere, so we decided to “love the one we’re with.” That means we made a conscious decision to do everything we could to make our space as enjoyable as possible for us. The first few nights we had cocktails. Then, in an effort to make it feel a little happier out there, I ordered floating color-changing light balls to brighten up the evenings. They’re solar-powered, and I was thrilled when they arrived! I inflated them and put them in the pool, and immediately, it was a happier place. I was so happy with them, in fact, that I ordered six more of them and hung them from the eave of the pool house…even more colorful happiness in the evenings! They absorb sunlight all day and illuminate automatically when the sun goes down.93244103_10222971590983078_89571285260042240_n

Also, in March, with lots of extra time on my hands, I started seeding sunflowers, cucumbers, zinnias, watermelons, and corn, and then, I transplanted the seedlings to the ground in our backyard and along the side of the house a few weeks later. We purchased small tomato plants, and I even decided to seed some Brussels sprouts. If you walked into my backyard now, you’d see tall sunflowers, bushy sunflowers, cucumber and watermelon vines, Brussels sprouts, and corn plants…they’re all growing beautifully! So when I say “welcome to the jungle,” I mean there are a lot of different things growing out there. There is so much greenery in our backyard, and it is glorious! Some of the sunflowers are blooming, and I have about six different varieties. The zinnias should continue to bloom well into the fall, and some of the sunflower varieties will, as well. As for the cucumbers, they are just now beginning to fruit, and I expect the corn to be ready about the middle of July.

What I’m saying is that our backyard jungle is a product of the pandemic. I’m certainly not happy we had and still have COVID-19 in our midst, and I pray it goes away soon. I pray every day that some company will find a vaccine…and fast. I’d love to see this go away as quickly as it appeared.

While I hate this coronavirus, I’m so glad I used my time wisely. I’m so glad our family got into the habit of spending evenings on the patio together…and sometimes social-distancing with friends out there. I’m glad I got my garden started earlier than I usually do, and I’m glad I branched out and planted more than I usually do…even if the yard is starting to look like a jungle!

I went out of town for a week for a mother/daughter trip, and my husband stayed home. He did a beautiful job of tending the garden while I was gone! I was thrilled to come home and find all the plants are thriving…well, except the tomatoes. While the plants look good, we have yet to see a fruit. They might be a fail for this year, and that’s OK. What I don’t have in tomatoes, I’ll have in corn, cucumbers, and watermelons, I hope.

I’m telling all my friends that if they enjoy sunflowers and zinnias, come on over to our house this summer. We’ll have cocktails on the patio while we talk and laugh. And I’ll show off our garden. Maybe next month, they’ll even be able to take home some cucumbers! I want to share the joy we have experienced in our own little backyard.

Welcome to the jungle!

 

Vote Me Off the Island…Please!

Vote me off the island…please!

Last night, I accidentally woke my husband up about 15 minutes after he had fallen asleep. He was fast asleep, and I was scrolling Facebook, waiting for my restless leg syndrome meds to kick in…pun intended. As I passed pictures of different people around the country in various stages of “shelter in place” or “economy is open,” I came across something from the Today.com Facebook page titled Married? Quarantined? These hilarious parents get the struggle. And that got my attention. So I clicked.

Do you remember middle school health class? Remember when the teacher told the whole class they were going to learn about sex, but if you laughed, you were just showing your own immaturity? Remember how just knowing you weren’t supposed to laugh caused a giggle to start welling up inside you, even before anyone said the word “penis”? That’s how I felt while I was reading this piece on Today.com…I felt like that kid in health class who was trying to stifle a laugh, but because she was trying not to laugh, everything was funnier.

Well, I started reading the piece on Today.com, and everything it said was so familiar! Those other people writing the posts could have been me! You can see the whole post by clicking here. But just so you get the idea, one post, from “Lurkin’ Mom,” said, “My husband came home from the store with red delicious apples like he thinks I won’t divorce him just because we’re in the middle of a pandemic.”  Aren’t we all tired of listening to our family members chew?!?! I started to giggle…even though I knew I wasn’t supposed to, because my husband would be angry if I woke him up….and knowing I wasn’t supposed to laugh just made it worse. My silent giggles were causing me to shake, which in turn, was causing the bed to shake. I kept reading, because there was no turning back once I got the giggles, and then I read this post by Maryfairyboberry:

Quarantine Day 2, Hour 689- I’ve become very aware of my husband’s toenails and I’d like to be voted off the island now.

And that was it…I lost it. All those giggles I had been trying to suppress came out in repeated snorts! Yes, I was snort-laughing, because I was trying so hard not to laugh! It wasn’t just one snort…and they were loud snort-laughs! I knew I was in trouble when my husband sat straight up and said, “Are you OK?!?!?!”

That’s when I could just let the laughter go…tears of laughter were rolling down my face as I tried to explain to him while gasping for air, “I’m…fine…I’m…just…laughing…at…this…post!” He was not amused. He wasn’t terribly angry, but he did say, “Why don’t you just go to sleep like a normal person?!?”

Hmmm…because I’m not a normal person?

Here’s the thing…I was laughing so hard at all those posts, because they ring so true! I don’t mean the toenail thing is true. My husband’s toenails are just fine, but when you’re cooped up together for so long, something is going to bother you! I love my husband, but we just aren’t meant to be together 24/7 for weeks/months on end! Is any couple really supposed to be together 24/7 for weeks/months on end?!?! I feel pretty sure that if someone asked my husband right now, “If you were stranded on a deserted island and could pick one person to have with you, who would it be?”…he would not pick me. I’d probably pick Bear Grylls, for his survival skills alone, but he’d make fun of my lack of survival skills…so I’m going with Jason Momoa or The Rock…or maybe Mike Rowe! Yes, Mike Rowe would be my choice. My husband would for sure pick Heidi Klum or Giselle Bundchen. He would not pick me.

Trust me when I say he wants to be voted off this island too! It’s not just me! We enjoy each other’s company, and we have had a lot of fun together during the shelter-in-place order. We’ve spent time in the sun. He has helped me with my gardening. We’ve watched a lot of bad TV. We’ve had cocktails under the stars….and laughed till our stomachs hurt. But it’s time to leave Isolation Island, and if one of us doesn’t leave soon, well, don’t blame us for what happens.

Lucky for him (and me), he is going to the beach this weekend. I guess here is where I need to put another disclaimer: I love my husband. I do not want him to be gone permanently, but his going to the beach for the weekend will be good for both of us! When he comes home, I will welcome him with open arms. Absence makes the heart grow fonder!

But back to that Today.com piece…do you want to know which post resonated the most with me? My friend, Mary Ann, called me after I reposted the whole piece from Today.com. She said, “I know exactly which post made you laugh the hardest.” And she was right. If you read my piece back on February 26 titled Karma Bit Me (you can see it here), then you’ll understand. In the Today.com piece, jackwax04 posted this exchange:

(my husband has the man flu. After 3 days):

M: will you please just take the medicine?

H: “pouts” fine, what flavor is it?

M: what flav…it’s ADULT FLAVORED!

 

Holy moly…welcome to my world! And yes, please vote me off the island now!

Staying Sane (In a Time of Insanity)

Staying sane.

It’s May 6. We are deep into the stay-at-home orders all over the country. It appears our state, North Carolina, will move into the first phase of “opening the economy” this Friday, May 8, if all goes as planned.

Finally!

I’m sure there are some who would say I’m not particularly sane during “normal” times, but wow…if they could see me now! For the past however-many-weeks, I’ve been doing everything I can just to keep from falling into the abyss. And so far, my silly strategies have worked, but you might think the “strategies” themselves are crazy.

When we were first “locked in,” it never occurred to me it would last this long. If someone had told you even one year ago that our country would basically shut down for this long, would you have believed them? I would have told them they’d lost their minds. But here we are. I have been doing a lot of reading in the sunshine (we’ve been lucky with the weather) since this whole thing started. If you need some light reading, I highly recommend Mike Rowe’s The Way I Heard It. You know Mike Rowe…from the TV show, Dirty Jobs…also a good way to spend your time. He’s funny and entertaining (and easy on the eyes!).IMG_5897

When the isolation first started, I binge watched some shows and movies on Netflix and Amazon Prime. I’m not one to sit around watching TV all day, but I needed to kill some time. Just like half the country, I reluctantly watched every episode of Tiger King on Netflix. When people say “truth is stranger than fiction,” they mean it. I am a “live and let live” kind of person, but wow…Joe Exotic is another level of strange to me. And Carole Baskin? Maybe she did and maybe she didn’t feed her first husband to the tigers.

Upon recommendations from friends, I started watching Ozark on Netflix. It’s good, but it stressed me out. I’ll return to it, I’m sure, simply because I love Jason Bateman. I’ve loved him since Silver Spoons. Cue the theme song: Here we are, face to face, a couple of Silver Spoons. Hopin’ to find we’re two of a kind… Yeah, I’ll return to Ozark, for sure. I’ve also rewatched some old favorite movies…Clueless, Troop Beverly Hills, Sliding Doors…nothing too deep. There are a few more series I’ve never seen that I’d still like to watch; Downton Abbey is at the top of the list.

But I’ve done way more than just stare at screens. My garden is in place way earlier than ever before! I got my seeds started back in April (or maybe late March!), and for a while, I had way too many seedlings in my dining room. I had started them in the little poolhouse we have out back, but when my husband kept stepping on them, I moved them to the dining room. Then, he  wished he had been more careful in the poolhouse, because I had planted some of them in Cow Pots. If you’re not familiar with Cow Pots, they are seeding pots made of dehydrated cow manure. (They’re great…you can order them here.) I had seen Mike Rowe visit the manufacturing facility on Dirty Jobs (there it is again!). They are actually good for plants, and when your seedlings are ready, you just drop the whole thing in the ground. Surprisingly, dehydrated cow manure has no smell! What Mike Rowe didn’t tell me on the show is that, after it’s rehydrated by watering the plants, cow manure in the form of Cow Pots…well, it smells a little. It’s not overwhelming, but let’s just say my husband was happy to see me get those out of the dining room and into the garden. I should probably mention it’s the largest garden I’ve ever had…various types of sunflowers, lots of zinnias, sweet corn, lots of tomato plants, brussel sprouts, various types of cucumbers, and even watermelons! So far, everything’s looking great, but we have a late frost coming up this week. Fingers crossed.

I even watched what I think was a mole burrowing through the soil in my backyard. At least I hope it was a mole. I was walking past the garden one day and noticed cracks in the soil, and it looked like the ground was “breathing.” At first, I thought it might have been some sort of alien that was going burst of the ground, but then I decided it had to be a mole burrowing blindly through the soil. I’ve spent even more time banging a trowel against the fence to scare away a woodpecker from my neighbor’s house, and I’ve been frightened by owls who flew way too closely past me on the patio at night. All this wildlife!

But that’s not all. Here’s where my insanity really starts to show. I’ve been walking every day. I can’t just be in this house. I’m not one to stay home all the time, so I’ve had to adjust. But here’s the thing…I’m walking miles a day…on my patio. No, the patio is not particularly large. OK, well, it’s not a small patio. But yes, I’m walking miles every day around the pool. When I need a break or if I get a phone call, I just walk outside and walk in circles around the pool…anywhere from four to six miles a day. I had been walking through the neighborhood with my husband, but there were a lot of people out! And social distancing is difficult. Also, there’s one couple that will not cross the street for anyone. I got tired of always crossing instead of them. Doesn’t it seem we should take turns crossing? Yep…my crazy is showing.

I’m also working on a project for our daughter’s school, even though school is not in session. Our school has a fabulous sports awards show every year, and this year, I’m working on it. It’s going to be virtual, so it’s tricky, but things are coming together. But when I need to take a break from that, I either do my walking around the patio, or I go to Instagram and find Twitch…you know, from Ellen…he’s the DJ. We’ll, he’s a dancer, and he’s married to a dancer, Allison Holker, and they have teamed up with the American Heart Association. They’re doing workouts on Instagram to keep people moving, and they’re fun! You can do any variation of them…low impact or high impact…and it is quite the mood booster! I highly recommend! Find Twitch on Instagram at Sir_Twitch_alot.

At night, my husband and I often sit outside on the patio, having a cocktail and looking at the stars. I’ve mentioned the Sky Guide app before. It helps locate and identify planets, constellations, and satellites passing by! We also enjoy the color-changing light balls we ordered to float in the pool and hang from the eave of the poolhouse. They really make it feel happier out there!IMG_5894

We have celebrated friends’ birthdays with drive by parades…nobody loves making a birthday sign more than I do! And for me, it’s totally relaxing! A couple of times, I’ve sat down with my teenage daughter to make lots of signs to display in friends’ yards…relaxes me and surprises them!IMG_5898

And when I have a little quiet time, I drop a letter or postcard in the mail to a friend or family member far away. It boosts my mood, and I can only hope it brings them a little sunshine when they receive it.

For now, I’m on my way out to the patio for a few trips around the pool. Stay sane!