Category / family

by Kelly Mattei

Apple Cider Vinegar Gummies

Apple Cider Vinegar Gummies.

Y’all know I love to share when I find a great product! My latest find? Goli Apple Cider Vinegar Gummies! ***As always, consult your doctor before taking any dietary supplements.***

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Are there benefits to consuming small amounts of apple cider vinegar? Maybe. Studies have shown it might help control blood pressure, and it might aid in digestion. I don’t know how scientific those studies were, but according to WebMD, studies have found that drinking vinegar might help fight obesity, and one study found that “vinegar improved blood sugar and insulin levels in a group of people with Type 2 diabetes.” So believe me when I say I’m no snake oil salesman. I’m not pushing this product. I’m simply telling you that I like Goli Apple Cider Vinegar Gummies. Purchase here.

If you’ve ever tried to drink apple cider vinegar, you know it’s not easy. But a year or two ago, I read that it would help with a gallbladder attack. What I read suggested mixing it with apple juice. When I had a gallbladder attack (I have gallstones), I mixed the concoction, but I didn’t really expect it to help, but on that day, it was either the shortest gallbladder attack ever, or the concoction really helped. I don’t know which was true, but I drank the concoction the next time too…and the same thing happened.

So when I was ordering some things with a friend who works in a store in LA, and he suggested the Goli Apple Cider Vinegar Gummies, I decided to try them. I told him to add two bottles to my order, and honestly, I forgot about them till the box arrived.

I opened one bottle and tried two gummies. To my surprise, they were delicious! I put the two bottles in the cupboard in my kitchen, so I could take two in the morning and two in the evening, and one bottle disappeared way too quickly! How did I go through a whole bottle in under two weeks? My husband, when questioned, confessed. I explained to him that he should have read the directions on the bottle…it’s not recommended that anyone take more than six a day, and I promptly ordered more directly from the Goli website.

Now, here’s what I can tell you…before you try any kind of supplement, you should consult your doctor. I don’t know if these Goli ACV gummies have actually helped me in any way, and I hate to jinx myself, but I can say that my gallbladder attacks have been fewer and farther between. Before you start to lecture me about the gallbladder, I should tell you I have consulted a doctor and practically begged them to remove it…to no avail. Are the gummies helping me with the gallbladder thing? I don’t know. Maybe it has a placebo effect, but whatever it is…I’m planning to keep taking the gummies!

Like I said, I placed my first order with a friend who worked in a retail store in Los Angeles. Since the store is closed right now because of COVID, I had to order from somewhere else when I started running short. I went straight to the Goli website (click here) and ordered, but after a few days, I received an email that the shipment would be delayed. I waited. And when I eventually called Goli, they refunded the cost of shipping, but they still couldn’t tell me exactly when my order would ship. So I went to Amazon and ordered there. The Amazon order arrived way ahead of the order shipped directly from Goli, but I’m well supplied for a while, since I ordered five bottles from each place! You can order from Amazon here.

So this is my way of sharing information with you about a product I love. Does it have any real benefits? I don’t know. My own experience is that my gallbladder seems less crazy. Is it because of the gummies? I don’t know, but I’m going to keep taking them. They’re so good, it’s almost like having a little treat in the morning and a treat in the evening!

***Since the writing of this piece, I have had my gallbladder removed. I had instant relief from that malady, but I still take Goli Apple Cider Vinegar Gummies, because I have read that it help control blood sugar, weight, improves skin health, and kills harmful bacteria.***

by Kelly Mattei

Apple Cider Vinegar Gummies

Apple Cider Vinegar Gummies.

Y’all know I love to share when I find a great product! My latest find? Goli Apple Cider Vinegar Gummies!

Are there benefits to consuming small amounts of apple cider vinegar? Maybe. Studies have shown it might help control blood pressure, and it might aid in digestion. I don’t know how scientific those studies were, but according to WebMD, studies have found that drinking vinegar might help fight obesity, and one study found that “vinegar improved blood sugar and insulin levels in a group of people with Type 2 diabetes.” So believe me when I say I’m no snake oil salesman. I’m not pushing this product. I’m simply telling you that I like Goli Apple Cider Vinegar Gummies.61DOyVv18wL._AC_SL1280_

If you’ve ever tried to drink apple cider vinegar, you know it’s not easy. But a year or two ago, I read that it would help with a gallbladder attack. What I read suggested mixing it with apple juice. When I had a gallbladder attack (I have gallstones), I mixed the concoction, but I didn’t really expect it to help, but on that day, it was either the shortest gallbladder attack ever, or the concoction really helped. I don’t know which was true, but I drank the concoction the next time too…and the same thing happened.

So when I was ordering some things with a friend who works in a store in LA, and he suggested the Goli Apple Cider Vinegar Gummies, I decided to try them. I told him to add two bottles to my order, and honestly, I forgot about them till the box arrived.

I opened one bottle and tried two gummies. To my surprise, they were delicious! I put the two bottles in the cupboard in my kitchen, so I could take two in the morning and two in the evening, and one bottle disappeared way too quickly! How did I go through a whole bottle in under two weeks? My husband, when questioned, confessed. I explained to him that he should have read the directions on the bottle…it’s not recommended that anyone take more than six a day, and I promptly ordered more directly from the Goli website.

Now, here’s what I can tell you…before you try any kind of supplement, you should consult your doctor. I don’t know if these Goli ACV gummies have actually helped me in any way, and I hate to jinx myself, but I can say that my gallbladder attacks have been fewer and farther between. Before you start to lecture me about the gallbladder, I should tell you I have consulted a doctor and practically begged them to remove it…to no avail. Are the gummies helping me with the gallbladder thing? I don’t know. Maybe it has a placebo effect, but whatever it is…I’m planning to keep taking the gummies!

Like I said, I placed my first order with a friend who worked in a retail store in Los Angeles. Since the store is closed right now because of COVID, I had to order from somewhere else when I started running short. I went straight to the Goli website (click here) and ordered, but after a few days, I received an email that the shipment would be delayed. I waited. And when I eventually called Goli, they refunded the cost of shipping, but they still couldn’t tell me exactly when my order would ship. So I went to Amazon and ordered there. The Amazon order arrived way ahead of the order shipped directly from Goli, but I’m well supplied for a while, since I ordered five bottles from each place! You can order from Amazon here.

So this is my way of sharing information with you about a product I love. Does it have any real benefits? I don’t know. My own experience is that my gallbladder seems less crazy. Is it because of the gummies? I don’t know, but I’m going to keep taking them. They’re so good, it’s almost like having a little treat in the morning and a treat in the evening!

by Kelly Mattei

Memorial Day

Memorial Day.

It’s more than just a day to gather for a picnic with family and friends. It’s more than just the beginning of summer. It’s more than a day off from work.

Lots of folks think Memorial Day is a day to honor all veterans. Nope…that’s Veteran’s Day, observed in November. This federal holiday, observed on the last Monday of May, is for honoring and memorializing military personnel who made the ultimate sacrifice for their country…they died while serving our country.

Don’t get me wrong. there is nothing wrong with gathering with friends and family on Memorial Day weekend. There’s nothing wrong with celebrating the beginning of summer. But the actual purpose of this particular holiday is to remember and memorialize those made the ultimate sacrifice to make freedom possible and keep it possible in this country.

When I was growing up, we gathered with family and friends on Memorial Day, often at my grandparents’ house, but my parents always made sure we, at the very least, talked about the meaning of the holiday. My grandfather served in World War II, but we were fortunate he came home safe and sound, as did his brother. I can’t remember hearing of any family members who lost their lives in the line of duty, but my parents always made us aware that our freedom “wasn’t free.” People lost their lives so we could be free.

I think, this year, with the isolation of the COVID-19 pandemic, we have learned a little something extra about freedom. It has forced me to spend a lot of time thinking about freedom and how fortunate we are to live in a country where we have freedom. Sure, it has been limited in the last couple of months, but we know this is temporary. Can you imagine what it would be like if these limitations on our freedom were permanent? If we risked arrest for leaving our homes without permission? Or if we risked living out our lives in a work camp for speaking out against our government? I don’t claim to understand all the other cultures and governments of the world, but I know that in this country, if we aren’t happy with the government, we can, at the very least, vocalize our unhappiness. Remember, people in North Korea can’t do that. If they speak out against the government, they can be killed or sent to work camps.

Several years ago, I read a book called Escape from Camp 14, by Blaine Harden, based on the life and journey of a man named Shin Dong-hyuk, the only former prisoner known to have escaped from an internment camp in North Korea. It was eye-opening and disturbing. In fact, I’m going to read it again, just to revisit the details. It truly made me thankful that I live in the United States, but I think it will be especially meaningful now. If you’d like to read it, you can order from Amazon here.

While Memorial Day is always meaningful to me, this year, it will have more meaning. I will sit down with my family over breakfast Monday and talk about the meaning of the holiday. Weather permitting, my husband and I will take a walk through a cemetery near our home. Unfortunately, we don’t have any small flags to place on the graves of those who lost their lives in the line of duty this year, but we will remember those who lost their lives while fighting for our country’s (and the world’s) freedom.

Happy Memorial Day to you and your family.

 

 

 

by Kelly Mattei

Vote Me Off the Island…Please!

Vote me off the island…please!

Last night, I accidentally woke my husband up about 15 minutes after he had fallen asleep. He was fast asleep, and I was scrolling Facebook, waiting for my restless leg syndrome meds to kick in…pun intended. As I passed pictures of different people around the country in various stages of “shelter in place” or “economy is open,” I came across something from the Today.com Facebook page titled Married? Quarantined? These hilarious parents get the struggle. And that got my attention. So I clicked.

Do you remember middle school health class? Remember when the teacher told the whole class they were going to learn about sex, but if you laughed, you were just showing your own immaturity? Remember how just knowing you weren’t supposed to laugh caused a giggle to start welling up inside you, even before anyone said the word “penis”? That’s how I felt while I was reading this piece on Today.com…I felt like that kid in health class who was trying to stifle a laugh, but because she was trying not to laugh, everything was funnier.

Well, I started reading the piece on Today.com, and everything it said was so familiar! Those other people writing the posts could have been me! You can see the whole post by clicking here. But just so you get the idea, one post, from “Lurkin’ Mom,” said, “My husband came home from the store with red delicious apples like he thinks I won’t divorce him just because we’re in the middle of a pandemic.”  Aren’t we all tired of listening to our family members chew?!?! I started to giggle…even though I knew I wasn’t supposed to, because my husband would be angry if I woke him up….and knowing I wasn’t supposed to laugh just made it worse. My silent giggles were causing me to shake, which in turn, was causing the bed to shake. I kept reading, because there was no turning back once I got the giggles, and then I read this post by Maryfairyboberry:

Quarantine Day 2, Hour 689- I’ve become very aware of my husband’s toenails and I’d like to be voted off the island now.

And that was it…I lost it. All those giggles I had been trying to suppress came out in repeated snorts! Yes, I was snort-laughing, because I was trying so hard not to laugh! It wasn’t just one snort…and they were loud snort-laughs! I knew I was in trouble when my husband sat straight up and said, “Are you OK?!?!?!”

That’s when I could just let the laughter go…tears of laughter were rolling down my face as I tried to explain to him while gasping for air, “I’m…fine…I’m…just…laughing…at…this…post!” He was not amused. He wasn’t terribly angry, but he did say, “Why don’t you just go to sleep like a normal person?!?”

Hmmm…because I’m not a normal person?

Here’s the thing…I was laughing so hard at all those posts, because they ring so true! I don’t mean the toenail thing is true. My husband’s toenails are just fine, but when you’re cooped up together for so long, something is going to bother you! I love my husband, but we just aren’t meant to be together 24/7 for weeks/months on end! Is any couple really supposed to be together 24/7 for weeks/months on end?!?! I feel pretty sure that if someone asked my husband right now, “If you were stranded on a deserted island and could pick one person to have with you, who would it be?”…he would not pick me. I’d probably pick Bear Grylls, for his survival skills alone, but he’d make fun of my lack of survival skills…so I’m going with Jason Momoa or The Rock…or maybe Mike Rowe! Yes, Mike Rowe would be my choice. My husband would for sure pick Heidi Klum or Giselle Bundchen. He would not pick me.

Trust me when I say he wants to be voted off this island too! It’s not just me! We enjoy each other’s company, and we have had a lot of fun together during the shelter-in-place order. We’ve spent time in the sun. He has helped me with my gardening. We’ve watched a lot of bad TV. We’ve had cocktails under the stars….and laughed till our stomachs hurt. But it’s time to leave Isolation Island, and if one of us doesn’t leave soon, well, don’t blame us for what happens.

Lucky for him (and me), he is going to the beach this weekend. I guess here is where I need to put another disclaimer: I love my husband. I do not want him to be gone permanently, but his going to the beach for the weekend will be good for both of us! When he comes home, I will welcome him with open arms. Absence makes the heart grow fonder!

But back to that Today.com piece…do you want to know which post resonated the most with me? My friend, Mary Ann, called me after I reposted the whole piece from Today.com. She said, “I know exactly which post made you laugh the hardest.” And she was right. If you read my piece back on February 26 titled Karma Bit Me (you can see it here), then you’ll understand. In the Today.com piece, jackwax04 posted this exchange:

(my husband has the man flu. After 3 days):

M: will you please just take the medicine?

H: “pouts” fine, what flavor is it?

M: what flav…it’s ADULT FLAVORED!

 

Holy moly…welcome to my world! And yes, please vote me off the island now!

by Kelly Mattei

A Different Mother’s Day

A Different Mother’s Day…

It’s almost here. We’ve never made a gigantic deal about Mother’s Day at our house, but we do celebrate it. My family usually goes out for brunch on Mother’s Day. We don’t do big gifts or anything, but my husband usually orders flowers or one of my favorite treats. We  normally have the freedom to make a reservation where we want to dine. But not this year.

Honestly, I look at Mother’s Day the same way my own mother used to look at it: I’m just thankful God let me be a mother to my daughter. There is no job more difficult or more rewarding. The job description is always changing, and I love it. I really do. When I was in my twenties, long before I was a mom, I thought having a child was not important to me. One of my coworkers, who had two children, once said to me, “It’s the meaning of life.” And she was right. My daughter teaches me a lot more about love and life than I teach her, I’m sure, and I love growing with her.

I always tell people motherhood gave me an opportunity to have a third childhood. My first childhood was my real childhood. Then, college was the next one. And once I had my baby, when I was 33, I got to start enjoying another childhood. She will be going off to college in a couple of years, and I’m sure I’ll enjoy that too! My neighbor, when she came over for social-distancing cocktails on the patio last week, told me and my daughter, “My daughter’s time at The University of Alabama were the best four years of my life!” She loved visiting her daughter in Tuscaloosa and got to enjoy another “childhood.” Motherhood is a great experience.

No one enjoyed motherhood more than my own mother. This is my third Mother’s Day without her in the world. I won’t cry this year like I did that first one, but I still miss her. I’ve just found ways of coping with the fact that she’s not here anymore. Lots of times, during this pandemic and isolation, I have wondered what she would have thought of it. Since she was a nurse, she would have known the importance of social distancing, but she wouldn’t have liked it. My parents were always big on “living life.” They loved the movie, Shawshank Redemption, and one of their favorite quotes from the movie was, “Get busy living, or get busy dying.”

Since this isolation started, my brother and I have speculated about what our parents would have said about the disease and the stay-at-home order. Neither of us truly knows what they would have said, but I know I would have spent a lot of time on the phone with them talking about it.

Unfortunately, I don’t have my mother. I can’t call her and ask her about it this Mother’s Day…the Mother’s Day in the age of COVID-19. If you still have your mother, think about that…once they’re gone, you can’t call your mom to ask her about a recipe or a story she told you about her life or how to handle a sick child. And I can’t ask mine what she thinks about COVID-19. I know it sounds like a little thing, but I’d love to know her thoughts on it all. In the 1950s, when she was in nursing school and studied in Louisiana for a while, she was exposed to tuberculosis and leprosy, both infectious diseases. Sure, they were infectious, but as a medical professional, she did what she needed to do to help the people. Later, when I was in elementary school, she worked for the health department and had to visit an area that reportedly had several cases of tuberculosis…a highly contagious respiratory disease. I would love to hear her opinion of the whole COVID-19 crisis….but I can’t.

This Mother’s Day will be different. That’s for sure. Because we can’t go out for brunch, we will likely cook at home. Sure, it will be different, but we will make it fun. It’s supposed to be a beautiful day, so I’m guessing my husband will cook on the grill. I’ll give him a grocery list today. Since the high is supposed to be around 70, we’ll have lunch outside. I won’t require my family to spend the whole day doting on me, but I will enjoy some time with them. Gifts? I don’t know if they will shower me with gifts, and it’s just fine if they don’t. I’m just thankful we are all healthy and can spend some time together.

This Mother’s Day, I’ll be thankful for my healthy little family. I’m thankful my own parents gave me a good life. I’m thankful for my brother and nephews…my cousins, aunts, uncles. And I’m thankful for great friends.

I’m just thankful. God bless mothers.

 

by Kelly Mattei

Staying Sane (In a Time of Insanity)

Staying sane.

It’s May 6. We are deep into the stay-at-home orders all over the country. It appears our state, North Carolina, will move into the first phase of “opening the economy” this Friday, May 8, if all goes as planned.

Finally!

I’m sure there are some who would say I’m not particularly sane during “normal” times, but wow…if they could see me now! For the past however-many-weeks, I’ve been doing everything I can just to keep from falling into the abyss. And so far, my silly strategies have worked, but you might think the “strategies” themselves are crazy.

When we were first “locked in,” it never occurred to me it would last this long. If someone had told you even one year ago that our country would basically shut down for this long, would you have believed them? I would have told them they’d lost their minds. But here we are. I have been doing a lot of reading in the sunshine (we’ve been lucky with the weather) since this whole thing started. If you need some light reading, I highly recommend Mike Rowe’s The Way I Heard It. You know Mike Rowe…from the TV show, Dirty Jobs…also a good way to spend your time. He’s funny and entertaining (and easy on the eyes!).IMG_5897

When the isolation first started, I binge watched some shows and movies on Netflix and Amazon Prime. I’m not one to sit around watching TV all day, but I needed to kill some time. Just like half the country, I reluctantly watched every episode of Tiger King on Netflix. When people say “truth is stranger than fiction,” they mean it. I am a “live and let live” kind of person, but wow…Joe Exotic is another level of strange to me. And Carole Baskin? Maybe she did and maybe she didn’t feed her first husband to the tigers.

Upon recommendations from friends, I started watching Ozark on Netflix. It’s good, but it stressed me out. I’ll return to it, I’m sure, simply because I love Jason Bateman. I’ve loved him since Silver Spoons. Cue the theme song: Here we are, face to face, a couple of Silver Spoons. Hopin’ to find we’re two of a kind… Yeah, I’ll return to Ozark, for sure. I’ve also rewatched some old favorite movies…Clueless, Troop Beverly Hills, Sliding Doors…nothing too deep. There are a few more series I’ve never seen that I’d still like to watch; Downton Abbey is at the top of the list.

But I’ve done way more than just stare at screens. My garden is in place way earlier than ever before! I got my seeds started back in April (or maybe late March!), and for a while, I had way too many seedlings in my dining room. I had started them in the little poolhouse we have out back, but when my husband kept stepping on them, I moved them to the dining room. Then, he  wished he had been more careful in the poolhouse, because I had planted some of them in Cow Pots. If you’re not familiar with Cow Pots, they are seeding pots made of dehydrated cow manure. (They’re great…you can order them here.) I had seen Mike Rowe visit the manufacturing facility on Dirty Jobs (there it is again!). They are actually good for plants, and when your seedlings are ready, you just drop the whole thing in the ground. Surprisingly, dehydrated cow manure has no smell! What Mike Rowe didn’t tell me on the show is that, after it’s rehydrated by watering the plants, cow manure in the form of Cow Pots…well, it smells a little. It’s not overwhelming, but let’s just say my husband was happy to see me get those out of the dining room and into the garden. I should probably mention it’s the largest garden I’ve ever had…various types of sunflowers, lots of zinnias, sweet corn, lots of tomato plants, brussel sprouts, various types of cucumbers, and even watermelons! So far, everything’s looking great, but we have a late frost coming up this week. Fingers crossed.

I even watched what I think was a mole burrowing through the soil in my backyard. At least I hope it was a mole. I was walking past the garden one day and noticed cracks in the soil, and it looked like the ground was “breathing.” At first, I thought it might have been some sort of alien that was going burst of the ground, but then I decided it had to be a mole burrowing blindly through the soil. I’ve spent even more time banging a trowel against the fence to scare away a woodpecker from my neighbor’s house, and I’ve been frightened by owls who flew way too closely past me on the patio at night. All this wildlife!

But that’s not all. Here’s where my insanity really starts to show. I’ve been walking every day. I can’t just be in this house. I’m not one to stay home all the time, so I’ve had to adjust. But here’s the thing…I’m walking miles a day…on my patio. No, the patio is not particularly large. OK, well, it’s not a small patio. But yes, I’m walking miles every day around the pool. When I need a break or if I get a phone call, I just walk outside and walk in circles around the pool…anywhere from four to six miles a day. I had been walking through the neighborhood with my husband, but there were a lot of people out! And social distancing is difficult. Also, there’s one couple that will not cross the street for anyone. I got tired of always crossing instead of them. Doesn’t it seem we should take turns crossing? Yep…my crazy is showing.

I’m also working on a project for our daughter’s school, even though school is not in session. Our school has a fabulous sports awards show every year, and this year, I’m working on it. It’s going to be virtual, so it’s tricky, but things are coming together. But when I need to take a break from that, I either do my walking around the patio, or I go to Instagram and find Twitch…you know, from Ellen…he’s the DJ. We’ll, he’s a dancer, and he’s married to a dancer, Allison Holker, and they have teamed up with the American Heart Association. They’re doing workouts on Instagram to keep people moving, and they’re fun! You can do any variation of them…low impact or high impact…and it is quite the mood booster! I highly recommend! Find Twitch on Instagram at Sir_Twitch_alot.

At night, my husband and I often sit outside on the patio, having a cocktail and looking at the stars. I’ve mentioned the Sky Guide app before. It helps locate and identify planets, constellations, and satellites passing by! We also enjoy the color-changing light balls we ordered to float in the pool and hang from the eave of the poolhouse. They really make it feel happier out there!IMG_5894

We have celebrated friends’ birthdays with drive by parades…nobody loves making a birthday sign more than I do! And for me, it’s totally relaxing! A couple of times, I’ve sat down with my teenage daughter to make lots of signs to display in friends’ yards…relaxes me and surprises them!IMG_5898

And when I have a little quiet time, I drop a letter or postcard in the mail to a friend or family member far away. It boosts my mood, and I can only hope it brings them a little sunshine when they receive it.

For now, I’m on my way out to the patio for a few trips around the pool. Stay sane!

 

 

by Kelly Mattei

Graduation Gifts

Graduation gifts.

Yes, it’s getting close to that time of year, and sadly, this year’s graduating class is not going to have the same experience as other classes. I have lots of friends whose children are graduating from high school during this terrible pandemic, and I know they feel “ripped off.” That seems to be the general consensus…ripped off.

As much as I feel ripped off on my favorite things…vacations, sports, etc…I’m an adult. Some might argue that I don’t always act like an adult, but technically speaking, I’m an adult. At 52, I know “this, too, shall pass,” but then, this isolation isn’t delaying my graduation, my prom, my wedding, or anything else. Sure, I’m having to delay (or even cancel) some of my vacations to some of my favorite places. Sure, I’m not getting to watch my daughter, who is a sophomore in high school, play school lacrosse. But “good Lord willing and the creek don’t rise,” she’ll be playing next year, and I’ll get to take other vacations.

These high school (and college!) seniors don’t get a “do over.”

And as I sat thinking about that recently, it occurred to me that, at the very least, I can let them know that I’m thinking of them. Normally, I would wait till the end of May or early June to send graduation gifts, but I decided to go ahead and start sending them now…just trying to put smiles on their faces right now…let them know we’re thinking of them. These kids are missing out on so much, and I think they will be thrilled to start getting some early gifts…no matter how big or small those gifts may be! They just like knowing someone remembered they are graduating.

So, while it’s on my mind, I want to share a few ideas for graduation gifts, in case you want to go ahead and send something to someone you know who is missing out on the fun stuff of senior year.

AMAZON GIFT CARDS. Seriously, this is what I’ve been sending. You can pick the amount you want to send, and Amazon will attach a gift note and ship it out to your favorite grad. With an Amazon gift card, they can order just about anything they want, right? I’ve been ordering the card that comes “wrapped” in a box with a bow. You can order here.

BATHROBE. For young people who will be heading off to college in the fall, a bathrobe makes a great gift. Many of them will have community bathroom situations, which in my mind, is part of the “joy” of freshman year, and they will need a good bathrobe. Lands’ End has some quality robes starting under $50, and many of them can be monogrammed. See their selection here.

OTHER PERSONALIZED GIFTS. Personalization Mall has lots of great ideas for personalized graduation gifts. When I graduated from high school many moons ago, some of my favorite gifts were a personalized laundry bag and shower caddy. Personalization Mall offers those and lots of other things. I know, a laundry bag sounds old-fashioned, but if a college student is as crafty as I was, they’ll find the nearest place that will wash, dry, and fold all their laundry for a small fee. Yep, I dropped mine off regularly…so much better than waiting for a washer and dryer to come available!  You can see their selection here.

OTHER GIFT CARDS. There are so many great gift cards graduate will love. Whether they are going off to college or not, they can use lots of different kinds of gift cards. Just think about what your graduate likes or enjoys. Most young folks in our area love Chick-Fil-A, so that’s a safe bet for a gift card. A Netflix gift card is another safe bet. Target and Walmart gift cards could come in handy for almost anyone. You can get them online at each company’s website.

CASH. Because cash is king. No doubt. Doesn’t every graduating senior love to get some cold hard cash as a gift? This year, I will be sending one cash gift to a friend’s daughter in Alabama, but I’m afraid she will have to get it in the form of a check, since we can’t see her to hand her the cash.

All these ideas are not new ideas for graduation gifts, but my point is…start gifting these grads NOW. They will appreciate the recognition. It might take some of the sting out of this isolation for them. Who doesn’t like to receive a surprise gift? Plus, you’ll not only be helping the graduates; you’ll also be helping the economy when it needs it!

 

by Kelly Mattei

The Bloom is Off the Rose

The bloom is off the rose.

I will admit it. At first, since no one in my family was sick with the coronavirus, it was fun hanging out at home with my family. We were fortunate to have a warm March (and April), so we were able to use the pool and spend time in the sun together. We slept in a little every day and watched some movies and series on Netflix and Amazon. It was like we were on a staycation…for about a week.

And then we became accustomed to living the lives of shut-ins. That’s something I never thought I would say. I never thought I would become accustomed to being stuck at home all the time, but I did. I’ve done everything around my house I can do except the difficult stuff I need to do. I need to be going through boxes in the attic and getting rid of stuff. I need to be cleaning closets and other spaces, but instead, I’ve been gardening…in my dining room. OK, so I’m just keeping my seeding pots in the dining room till they’re big enough to transfer to the ground outside, but it’s a little weird to see hundreds of plants in the dining room floor. I’ve been exercising every day, and I’ve been knitting some too. I rarely knit in April, because we’re pushing toward summer, but I’m knitting in April this year. I’ve been enjoying time with my family…lots of it.

But here we are…weeks into the “stay-at-home” order…and I’m getting tired of it. What seemed like fun in the beginning is growing stale now. Yes, the bloom is off the rose, so to speak. I’m tired of getting nervous before I check the stock market every day. I want to meet friends for lunch. I want to go into non-essential businesses! I want businesses to get back to work and start making money again.

Basically, I want life to be normal again.

I know normal will look different than it has before, and that’s OK. I remember when we had to get used to a different normal after 9/11. I can get used to a different normal, but I just don’t want this isolation to be that normal. I want to stop worrying about the stupid coronavirus. I want people to get well. I want to see friends. I want to visit family. I want our economy to recover and thrive. I want to go on vacation! Yes! I remember vacations! And by golly, I want to take, at least, some of the vacations I had planned before this insanity started. In fact, I’m still holding out hope against hope that I can take some of the trips I have planned for this summer. Oh, please! Oh, please! I love Charlotte, North Carolina, but I want out of this place! Is that too much to ask?

Speaking of the bloom being off the rose…I have worn makeup one time in the weeks since this whole isolation started. I had a Zoom meeting a couple of weeks ago, and since people were going to see me, I decided I needed to actually put on makeup. Maybe I should practice over the next week or so, just so I can remember how to do it when we can actually go places again! And let’s not even talk about hair! I’m sure my husband thinks I look like a dragon lady, because it’s long and untamed right now, and I don’t even care! I have a friend who says she will head straight to the thrift store when stores are open. She wants to buy long a-line skirts and other conservative clothing to go with the new sister wife look she has adopted during the pandemic. She is joking, of course…I hope.

I want to start moving around again. I want us to be allowed to figure out what normal is going to look like after all this insanity has passed. I haven’t started a letter-writing campaign or participated in any protests against the government, but I sure will be glad when we can start moving around again. I live in a great city, but I’m tired of being here for now. We have a lovely home, but I’m tired of looking at it day in and day out.

The bloom is officially off the rose.

by Kelly Mattei

A Bluebird Takes Flight

A bluebird of happiness takes flight.

I just received word that a dear family friend passed away. When I say “dear family friend,” I mean someone who had basically been a member of my family since my parents first married in 1961. My mother met her when they were both working at a Sunland Center in Florida. Sounds luxurious, right? Well, Sunland was  actually a facility that specialized in offering services for the physically and mentally disabled…mostly children. My mother was a nurse there, and Cynthia, the family friend, worked in the recreation department. Cynthia was just 18 when they met, and while she admired Mother, I think Mother kind of took her under her wing. Mother was four years older, a registered nurse, and married. They became lifelong friends.

With encouragement from my mother, Cynthia later went to nursing school and then continued her education to become a nurse anesthetist…against the odds, since she was dyslexic. But she worked hard, and she was successful.

My parents moved to Alabama soon after I was born, and I remember Cynthia visiting regularly throughout my life. In fact, I thought she was my aunt till I was eight or nine. I have pictures of her visiting when I was a baby.  I know she was with us at a hotel in Panama City Beach in March 1970, when my toddler brother pulled a coffee pot off the table, burning himself. Mother and Daddy rushed him to the hospital, and Cynthia stayed with me. We watched people shooting fireworks off the balconies of the hotel…out over the beach. That’s likely one of my earliest memories, since I was not quite three years old. I’m sure it registered in my longterm memory because my brother’s burn was emotional for me.

Later, Cynthia had a little Triumph convertible. I thought she was the coolest, and I loved riding in that little car with her. She would visit us once or twice a year, and she was fun and energetic. She loved telling stories, and she loved to laugh. She had an infectious sense of humor with a twinkle in her eye, and she was always supportive of our little family. With no kids of her own, she treated us as if we were hers. Interestingly, somehow I remember that she was visiting us in Spanish Fort when I turned ten in 1977. She gave me a cool hooded shirt and shorts, and some Faberge Tigress cologne…what I thought was a grown-up gift! I loved it…the bottle was beautiful, with a fuzzy top that looked like a tiger skin. Funny what we remember.

And when Daddy was dying with pancreatic cancer, Cynthia was right there with us…helping us help him. I vividly remember her bathing mother’s dog and entertaining my daughter and my cousin’s daughter. The girls were two and three years old at the time, and Cynthia knew how to entertain them.

You might remember that I wrote about Cynthia once before, a couple of years ago when I wrote about the Bluebird of Happiness I found in my mother’s home after she died. I didn’t know where she got them, but I knew Cynthia often brought little gifts when she visited Mother, and I was right…when I called Cynthia, she said she had given them to her. I promptly packaged them up and sent them to Cynthia, and she later told me she kept them on a little table next to a picture of Mother. You can see the Bluebird of Happiness piece here. 

Last year, when I took my daughter and one of her friends on a road trip along the Gulf Coast, we visited Cynthia in Tallahassee. She took us to dinner at Shula’s atop the Hotel Duval, and we enjoyed the view of the Tallahassee skyline from the balcony. I had planned to see her again at Labor Day this year, when we visit Tallahassee again for a Florida State University football game.

While I’m brokenhearted…again…after a big loss, I know that if she were here with me right now, we would be laughing about something. She could make anything funny…with just a look.  In fact, last year, when we went to dinner, she kept my daughter in stitches with her crazy sense of humor. She told my daughter stories from my youth, and we laughed and laughed.

She loved my family as if we were her own, and the feeling was mutual, so this loss is a big one. It took the wind out of my sails. While I know loss is going to happen, this one was a shock. She was 76, but she was a young 76, if that makes any sense. She was a tough chick, and she is missed already.

Hug your loved ones, and if you can’t hug them because of this pandemic, talk with them as much as you can.

by Kelly Mattei

Sliding Doors

Sliding Doors.

It’s a strange time in our lives…in history, even…right now. So many of us are stuck at home, and we’re having to do life differently. Sure, it’s not easy being stuck at home all the time, but there are some good things about it. One big one is that I’m getting to spend more time with my teenage daughter, who will be off to college in two short years. Secretly, I think she is enjoying the togetherness a little bit too.

We have been cooking together, walking together, and talking a lot. We have watched some of her favorite shows on Netflix. I hardly ever ask her to watch any of my favorites, because she tends to lose interest pretty quickly. A few years ago, I forced her to go see Guess Who’s Coming to Dinner on the big screen with me, and she fell asleep halfway through the movie. I had hoped she would watch it and enjoy it while learning a little bit about the civil rights struggle of the 1960s. I loved that movie when I was a teenager in the 1980s. My mother and I would watch it together every time it came on TV. If you’re not familiar with it, the movie was made in 1967 and stars Sidney Poitier, Katharine Hepburn, Spencer Tracy, and Isabel Sanford. It’s a lovely movie about a couple living in California and the weekend their grown daughter brings home her new fiancé, played by Poitier. The family is white, and the new fiancé is black…and he is perfect. It leaves me crying every time. You can rent it on Amazon Prime.

So last night, when my daughter asked me if I wanted to watch a movie with her, I played it safe. I asked her what movie she had in mind, and she said, “I don’t know. Is there something you’d like to watch?” What?!?! She was trusting me to pick a movie for us to watch together?!? I responded, “I really think you would like Sliding Doors. It stars Gwyneth Paltrow.” Apparently, Paltrow is too old for the teen set, because she asked, “Who is that?” I laughed and explained who Paltrow is and then explained the premise of the movie, “It’s about a woman who gets fired from her public relations job and is on her way home to her live-in boyfriend. It takes two paths…in one scenario, she catches the subway and gets home to find her live-in boyfriend in bed with someone else. In the other scenario, she misses the subway, because a little girl steps in front of her on the stairs, and she doesn’t catch her boyfriend cheating.”

I explained that the movie follows both paths and shows how one small moment in time can change the path of our lives.

To my surprise, she thought it sounded great! We sat down on the living room sofa together, and I rented the movie through my Amazon Prime account, and we watched it on the TV. She has watched so many movies on her laptop lately; I think she enjoyed watching on the television for a change. Lots of times, I will go upstairs to her room and watch some of her favorite shows with her, but we rarely watch movies. But last night, we snuggled up under blankets and watched the movie. She put her head on my shoulder, and we talked about the movie as it played. It was a great night, and I plan to let her pick a movie tonight or tomorrow night for us to watch together.

Who knows? Maybe this will become a habit, and we will share some of our favorite movies with each other. My hope is also that we will carry it on through after life becomes “normal” again, and if it doesn’t, that’s OK too, because we will have some memories. I hope this slower pace will teach us some valuable lessons that will carry on. Maybe we are learning that we don’t need to be rushing to the next thing all the time. Maybe we are learning to stop and smell the roses…both literally and figuratively. Maybe we are learning what’s important in life.

I know that once “normal” life resumes, we will fall back into some of our rushing around, but maybe we will pick up some new, good habits. And maybe my daughter will trust my taste in movies after seeing Sliding Doors! Next time, though, I will be prepared with her favorite cake batter popcorn to snack on while we watch. If you haven’t seen the movie, and you’re looking for a good one, this is one I loved when I was in my early 30s, and I still love it now! It will make you think. Rent it on Amazon Prime.

And if you’d like to make cake batter popcorn, you can see the recipe here.