Tag / love

by Kelly Mattei

My Favorite Everyday Jewelry

My favorite everyday jewelry. *As an Amazon Associate, I receive commission on items purchased through my links.*

I’m giving away some real secrets today!

This past weekend, I met a few friends from college for a weekend full of laughs, memories, drinks, food, and new memories! It’s always fun to get together with people I have known most of my life. I’m very fortunate to have maintained friendships with people I met in college 40 years ago. Did I mention we laugh a lot when we get together?!? Well, we do.

When I travel, whether I’m meeting friends for lunch or traveling, I like to keep the jewelry simple. That doesn’t mean I don’t wear pieces I love. I just like to have some things that will work with anything I wear, so I don’t have to take as much. Also, I find those same pieces are my “fall back” pieces when I’m in a hurry to get somewhere in Charlotte or when I can’t make a decision.

The best thing about them? They’re inexpensive! If I leave them behind somewhere, it’s no disaster. I also get lots of compliments on them. For those reasons and lots more, I highly recommend these pieces:

  • Earrings. Trendy CZ Gold Hoop Earrings for Women. These earrings come in lots of colors, but my favorites for traveling are the multicolor ones, simply for ease. They match everything. They’re not too big but not too small, and I receive countless compliments on them. Best of all? They are only $13.99! I have several pairs of the multicolor ones, and I also have them in pink, green, and blue. ***Also great earrings for sorority rush if you’re still wondering what to take/send/wear!***Purchase here.

  • Necklace. Again, a piece I receive countless compliments on, and again, inexpensive…only $7.99! It’s big enough to be noticed, but not big enough to be the only thing people see. Purchase here.

  • Bangle Bracelets. A trio of bangle bracelets for about $20. Sure, they’re costume jewelry, but they fill a need and dress up an ensemble! Get them here.

There you have it. Some of my best-kept secrets…divulged. Purchase while supplies last!

by Kelly Mattei

Good People Are Easy to Find

Good people are easy to find.

Last Thursday morning, I met my friend, Angela, in the Charlotte airport and boarded a plane to Los Angeles. It was the first time the two of us have taken a real trip together, just the two of us, I think. We have taken vacations with our daughters, and we have even taken vacations with my husband, but as far as I can remember, we had never taken a real vacation without anyone else. We have been friends for almost 40 years, so we were overdue. Before we went, we knew we were likely to have a lot of fun laughing, drinking, talking, relaxing, and more, but we had no idea what was ahead of us. We were pleasantly surprised!

It all started when I boarded the American Airlines flight to LAX. I got to my seat and lifted my carry-on bag into the overhead bin. Immediately, a gentleman in the row in front of me asked, “Would you like to trade seats?” I didn’t want to be rude, but I plan my travel ahead of time and pick my seats carefully. I booked the aisle seat on row 2, because I like to be near the front of the plane, but I do not like to sit at the bulkhead. I like to be able to put my handbag underneath the seat in front of me. When you sit at the bulkhead, you have to put all carry-ons, including your handbag into the overhead bin, and I don’t like to do that. Some people might think it’s ridiculous that I feel that way, but I like having my migraine meds, my reading materials, and my earbuds readily available. Therefore, I told the gentleman, “No, thank you, I don’t like sitting at the bulkhead. Sorry.” At about that time, my seatmate arrived, and he was that gentleman’s business partner. The first gentleman in row 1 turned to the woman in the seat next to him and asked if she would switch with my seatmate. She agreed and came back to sit by me.

Before we took off, I told her, “Please don’t hesitate to let me know if you need to get up during the flight. It’s not likely I will fall asleep, but please just let me know, and I can let you out of the row at any time.” I also told her I always get an aisle seat, because I end up going to the bathroom several times, so I understand needing to get up. We exchanged pleasantries. Soon after takeoff, we engaged in conversation. Her story is not mine to tell, but I can tell you this: she is one of the loveliest, most interesting people I have ever met! I can tell you most people would love to meet her, and she has an incredible life story. In fact, you can read her story in her own words, because she has written a book about her different life experiences. Her name is Dr. Niedre Heckman, and the book is called The World Where I Belong: My Quest for Identity As a Black Woman in White Skin. You can purchase it on Amazon (I started reading it last night) here. Like I said, I will not tell her story, but as an introduction, I will tell you she is an African-American woman who is about my age, and she was born with the condition called albinism. I will not pretend to know everything about the condition, but the most obvious characteristic is the lack of pigmentation in one’s skin/hair/eyes. Those of us who don’t have the condition can only imagine what it’s like to grow up with it, but Dr. Niedre Heckman is sharing some insight into her own life and experience. I highly recommend the book, based simply on the fact that I found her to be fascinating. She is most kind and wants good things for other people. We can all learn something from her. Highly recommend her book! That good person (#1) was easy to find!

It was an incredible start to the weekend! When we arrived at baggage claim in LAX, I introduced my longtime friend (40+ years!), Angela, to Dr. Heckman, and she walked away with the same impression. It was foreshadowing, I believe, for the rest of the weekend. Our meeting set the tone for a weekend with great people.

The next day, we opted for a late lunch in our hotel’s largest restaurant. We had a great table for people watching, one of my favorite hobbies. I was not disappointed that day. We were lingering over cocktails after lunch when a couple came in and sat at a table nearby. I noticed they were taking pictures, so I motioned to the gentleman that I would be happy to take pictures for them. He misunderstood my poor attempt at sign language and came over to our table, asking, “Do y’all want me to take your picture?” I said, “No, thank you! We were offering to take yours, but did you just say ‘y’all’?” He said, “I did! I’m from Alabama!” We said, “We are too!” (I was born in Florida but grew up in Alabama before moving to Charlotte 25 years ago.) After some discussion, we figured out this charming southern gentleman grew up with someone I know in Charlotte! We had a great time chatting with him and his friend…day made! Oh, we also got a glimpse of a few celebrities, one of whom even impressed my college-age daughter! Angela and I were most impressed by the lovely people we spent time with on that beautiful, sunny afternoon. What a great “small world moment”! And another good person (#2) who was easy to find!

The next afternoon, we had a lunch reservation at one of my very favorite restaurants ever. We were welcomed warmly by the manager, whom I had met on a previous visit. He has a positive, uplifting spirit and a genuine warmth about him, so I was thrilled to see him again. I introduced him to Angela, and we enjoyed talking with him. The food was fantastic (as always), and the whole experience could not have been better. Why? Because the staff at the restaurant was attentive; they were friendly and made us feel special! Woot! Good person (#3)…easy to find.

From there, we went to a scheduled shopping session at a store on Rodeo Drive. I love shopping with a particular gentleman who works there, because I have known him for years. I first met him probably 10 years ago when he was working at another store in the area. After COVID, I lost track of him, as he moved back to his hometown. However, last June, I walked into this particular store with my daughter and a friend, but without an appointment. The doorman called for an associate to meet us at the door, and out walked my old friend from the other store! I had found him! We agreed it was a God moment…I cried. Now, every time I’m in town, I shop with him, and I’m thrilled to know he is doing very well. My visits with him (and sometimes my purchases) always put a smile on my face. Good person (#4), easy to find.

But wait! There’s more! Saturday night, Angela and I had a reservation at another of my favorite restaurants, but we weren’t terribly hungry. We were also feeling a little lazy. For a brief moment, we considered canceling our dinner reservation, but finally decided to rally and go. We arrived at the restaurant right on time, and the hostess said, “Ohhh! I have the perfect table for you!” She whisked us off to a table that was, indeed, the perfect table. We could see the whole room! There was a fun birthday group at the table next to us. There was excitement in the air! Our server approached our table almost immediately. When I looked up at her, she asked, “Do I know you from somewhere?” I looked at her, puzzled, and replied, “Maybe here?” She said, “Maybe Bel Air?:” I recognized her then, but it was one of those rare moments I didn’t recall the name…”What is your name?” She replied, “Francesca.” Y’all. I met her when I dined at a restaurant in Bel Air five years ago! She was my server, and the next time I went, a year later, I requested her. This time, she recognized me first. I’m usually the one who remembers all the names and faces, so I was absolutely flattered that she remembered me! She literally said to me, “I have thought of you many times and wondered if I would ever see you again! When I saw you walk in, I recognized you immediately!” I was so happy to reconnect with her, and now, I will request her every time I go to this particular restaurant. Good person (#5) easy to find.

Sunday night, we had dinner with a friend we have known for several years. We have always known he’s a good person. We stumbled upon a friendship with him years ago.

Just goes to show you…good people are easy to find…if you just keep your eyes and ears open. It was a great vacation with a great friends and lots of new friends.

by Kelly Mattei

Halfway Through Sophomore Year

Halfway through sophomore year…

Our daughter just returned to college after being home for a few weeks for the holiday break. We loved having her, and I think she enjoyed being here, for the most part, but she was more than ready to get back to school. I could tell she was getting fidgety about being here too long.

And you know what? As much as I miss her, I am thrilled she wanted to get back to school.

We were fortunate to have a fun night last night. Somehow, the three of us ending up sitting in the keeping room off the kitchen with all three of our dogs, laughing and talking about anything that came to mind. I don’t know how long we laughed and talked, but it was a great way to end the break…on a very positive note. That’s not to say we didn’t get on each other’s nerves here and there while she was home. Of course, we got on each other’s nerves a few times. My mother used to say, “No house is big enough for two women.” My mother was a wise woman, but since our daughter is still our baby, our house is still big enough for all of us. While we annoyed each other a few times, the holiday break was full of positives for our little family. Ending it with an impromptu family. night was perfect.

Today, she drove the 450 miles back to school, and a friend rode with her. I will admit that I checked on them several times, and they even called me to ask some questions about the route. Each time my phone rang, I answered with, “Is everything OK?!?” I got questions like, “What’s a safe place to stop for a bathroom break?” I told them to pay attention to the signs and don’t take the exit if the signage isn’t good. Some generally safe places to stop are Chick-fil-a and even Starbucks, but if they don’t feel safe, don’t stop. Another question? “Should I go straight through Atlanta or get on the bypass?” I told her to just go straight through, and it worked out perfectly. She was on the other side of town in no time. Fortunately, her car gets pretty good gas mileage, so they were able to drive the whole 450 miles without filling up. That’s a big relief, because I don’t need to worry about her standing outside the car, filling it up with gas…and being a sitting duck.

We probably won’t see her for about two months, when we visit for Parents’ Weekend, and that’s OK. If she needs us, we can get there pretty quickly, but we just want her to be happy. She is already making plans to attend some basketball games and gymnastics meets this week, so good times are ahead for her! They’re ahead for me too, as I have a trip with a friend coming up this weekend!

If you have a freshman who is returning to college right now, one thing I can tell you is that, for me, it did get easier to send her back this year. She is established at her school and has friends. She is happy with her living arrangement. She is doing well in school, and she is making lots of fun plans. Did I get a little emotional yesterday? Yes. I was in a mood, but then I realized I was simply dreading her departure, and once I gave into it, I felt better. A few tears later, I felt better.

Before I know it, her sophomore year will be over, and she will be halfway through her bachelor’s degree requirements! Time flies, and I’m just happy she’s having fun!

by Kelly Mattei

Writing My Way Through Tough Times

Writing my way through tough times.

If we live long enough, we all experience heartache at some time or another. It might be in the form of a breakup, or it might be in the loss of a loved one. I experienced a few breakups as I grew up, just like most everyone else, but my first big, real heartache was when my daddy was diagnosed with and eventually died of pancreatic cancer in 2006.

He was officially diagnosed in February of that year, and he died on October 2 of the same year. Today is the 16th anniversary of his death…a tough day for me, and a reminder of the heartache I managed to survive. I suffered. It was the most painful thing I had ever experienced…losing my daddy. I was the mother of a toddler, but I was afraid I was losing my mind. I made lots of plans, because I thought I needed to stay busy. I ran myself ragged. But I learned.

When my mother fell ill 11 years later, my friend, Angela, who has also lost her father, said, “Get ready. It’s going to be tough when you lose her.” I vividly remember turning to her, saying, “It’s going to be tough, for sure, but I feel like I learned something when Daddy died. I feel like I developed some coping skills.” And after Mother passed, I learned I had, in fact, developed some coping skills. I had learned not to run from it. I had learned from my experience with Daddy’s death that I needed to just drop out of the world for a little while and process it. So that’s what I did after Mother died. I have written about it before. I literally gave myself permission to recover quietly and cancelled all plans and went to bed for a month. Don’t get me wrong. I was functional. But I didn’t feel like being social, so I wasn’t. I did what I needed to do for our daughter, but for the most part, I stayed home. And after a month, I “pulled up my bootstraps” and rejoined the living.

For Christmas that year, I had received a gift from a friend. It was a book called My Future Listography: All I Hope to do in Lists. When I received the gift, I thought it was cool, but when Mother died five days after Christmas, the book took on more meaning. It’s a journal, of sorts, and it’s part of a series of Listography books. Each one contains lists to fill in, and this one is full of lists about the future. Examples of some of the lists: What countries do you want to visit? What films do you want to see? What fictional characters would you like to hang out with? But after Mother died, the book became good therapy for me. Sounds crazy, but it gave me things to think about in the future. It made me see past the state of gloom I was in and look to the future. It really helped me move through the grief. It helped me realize that the act of putting my thoughts out there could help me heal. To order My Future Listography, click here.

And because of that, I started my blog. Writing things down…or typing them, in the case of the blog…was therapeutic! My Future Listography had brought me through the initial trauma of losing my mother, and writing the blog helpted me continue to keep putting one foot in front of the other.

Since losing my Mother on December 30, 2017, I have given copies of My Future Listography to lots of friends when they have been going through tough times…breakups, death of a loved one, or even new empty-nesters who are having a hard time. Sometimes, they look at me like it’s a weird gift, and maybe it is…but several times, people have called me later to tell me how much it helped them keep putting one foot in front of the other…keep looking toward the future. We know time helps with heartache, but knowing there is life ahead of the heartache can help too. When someone is in the middle of grief or heartache, they aren’t necessarily thinking about the good things ahead, but this journal can help them see what the future might look like.

I have a friend who went through a terrible breakup two years ago, and I gave her a copy after the relationship ended. There’s something about a relationship ending that can seem particularly dismal. It can feel like everything you believed about someone was wrong…a lie. Later, we realize that’s not always the case; sometimes, there are just extenuating circumstances that cause relationships to end. And as with my friend, sometimes we need to be reminded that there is a bright future ahead. She called me months after the breakup and told me the journal of lists had helped her. Now, I keep a few handy to give as gifts, because you never know when someone you love is going to experience something bad.

Sometimes, we just need a reminder that better things lie ahead.

by Kelly Mattei

Reminds Me of My Mother

Reminds me of my mother.

I’m on vacation. When our daughter told us she was going to Nantucket for a few days in July, my husband and I looked at each other and said, “Let’s go somewhere!” We promptly booked a getaway to the Bahamas.

And here we are. We woke up at 3:45 this morning to make our way to Charlotte-Douglas International Airport to start a rare trip without our daughter. The last time we vacationed without her, she was hiking her way across Iceland with a teenage tour group. That time, we traveled to Miami for a few days.

We arrived on the island at about noon today. Because we are staying in a villa, we went straight to the grocery store to get the necessities and some snacks. And then…because it seemed like we had been awake forever, we took a quick nap before going for a three-mile walk along the beach and stopping for dinner at a beachside restaurant along the way. It was a great afternoon.

But that’s not what reminded me of my mother.

After we returned to the villa, my husband took a shower in one bathroom while I took one in the other bathroom. I think I might do this in the wrong order, but I always remove my makeup before getting in the shower. And when I get out, I repeat the makeup remover process again.

I don’t use some fancy makeup remover. All my adult life, I have used Pond’s Cold Cream to remove my makeup. I have tried lots of the fancier, more expensive products over the years, but I have never found anything that removes makeup more easily for me than Pond’s.

When I’m home, I don’t notice the scent of Pond’s Cold Cream, but tonight, for some reason, in a villa in the Bahamas, I noticed the scent. And it smelled like my mother. Where do you think I got the idea to use Cold Cream to remove makeup? Yep…from my mother. I remember, as a little girl, watching her slather cold cream on her face and thinking it was so funny to see her with her face caked in it. She would slowly wipe the cold cream from her face to reveal a makeup free look. And the scent of cold cream often lingered on her face.

Often, I will reapply a little cold cream and wipe down my face one more time before bed, just because it moisturizes my skin and smells clean to me. Tonight was one of those nights. I am sitting in bed listening to the talk show my husband has on his computer. I’m wearing my green and white striped pajamas from my favorite hotel. They feel crisp and clean, and my face feels smooth and clean…and smells like my mother. It’s a good memory for me.

If mother were still alive, she would laugh at the fact that the scent of Pond’s Cold Cream makes me think of her. But I like to think she would be flattered too. She would think it is sweet that I have childhood memories of watching her slathering her face with cold cream.

I’m not sure why being in a different place brought out the scent, but I’m glad it did. I like thinking of my mother. And now I will pay more attention to the scent every time I use Pond’s Cold Cream.

It reminds me of my mother…

by Kelly Mattei

Love, Loss, and the Holidays

Love, loss, and the holidays.

Last night, I received a call from my dear friend, Jane. When I answered the phone, I knew immediately something was wrong. She was crying, and she said through her tears that someone had died, but I didn’t understand her the first time she said it. Painfully, I had to ask her to repeat it. And when she did, I cried too. I didn’t know the gentleman who had passed away, but I knew of him, and I knew him to be a good soul…a good friend to Jane. I also know she had inadvertently made a connection between him and a lady she knows just a few months ago. She had introduced them through some work she was doing, and a great friendship formed immediately.

His new lady friend was with him when he fell ill. She called 911 immediately and called a mutual friend who was a doctor, and they got him to the hospital as quickly as they could, but he didn’t make it.

When Jane was telling me about what had happened, she said, “I just needed to call you, because I need you to say something that will make it OK.” Jane is a close family friend. She knew my mother, who passed away four years ago, and she knows that somehow, my mother always knew the right thing to say to make someone feel better. She knew what to say to bring peace to a situation. Hopefully, with age, I will develop that gift, but I certainly don’t feel like I have it now. I simply said to Jane, “This won’t make it OK, but you can thank the Lord that you introduced those two and they were able to enjoy each other’s company for the past couple of months. You can know he [the gentleman who passed] spent the last couple of months engaging in good conversation and having fun with his new friend.” It was all I knew to say. I don’t know that it helped my friend in the moment, but it really does warm my heart that he got to spend his final months with a special lady…someone who is near and dear to Jane, and therefore, near and dear to me. I can’t name names, but all of these wonderful people are oddly connected…people you wouldn’t think belong together as friends, but somehow, they do.

Jane later told me the gentleman told her a few days ago that his new friend (the one Jane introduced him to) had helped him learn how to live for the Lord. Maybe that’s why they were brought together. I told Jane that is what should make her feel better…knowing she brought them together.

December is a tough month for a lot of people…including me. I lost my mother on December 30, 2017. She had fallen ill on Christmas Eve and never recovered, but Jane was with me every day at the hospital while Mother was lingering. I miss Mother every day, and especially this time of year. Sadly, both my grandmothers died on December 26, in different years, but still…same day. My daddy didn’t die in December, but he had his first obvious symptoms of pancreatic cancer in December 2005 and died the following October.

So while December is a joyous time, it’s also tough for people who have lost loved ones during the year. It’s tough for those of us who have painful memories. Yes, I have lots of good December memories too, but I’ll never forget all the terrible phone calls I have received in various Decembers.

I will give a few extra hugs on into the new year. I will try to think of those friends and family who have experienced loss. Some of those friends are experiencing their first holiday season without a loved one. There’s not anything we can say to “make it OK,” but there are things we can do to ease the pain a little. Hugs go a long way, and they are almost always welcome and appreciated.

by Kelly Mattei

A Visit.

A Visit.

This past weekend, I took a whirlwind trip to a college football game. When I say whirlwind trip, I mean I barely felt like my feet were on the ground between flights. But we crammed a lot of fun into a short stay. And yes, my team won.

On the return flight, I was the first to board. I always like to board as early as possible. I don’t know why…it’s just who I am. As the plane filled up, I noticed a gentleman boarding who reminded me of my daddy. He was tall with white hair…much like my daddy. I lost my daddy 15 years ago to pancreatic cancer, and on very rare occasions, I “see” him somewhere…I see someone who looks like him walking across a parking lot or in the background of photos. This particular gentleman ended up sitting in the row in front of me on the flight; it’s the first time I’ve been seated behind someone who reminds me of Daddy. If you’ve lost a loved one, you might know it’s interesting to see someone who resembles the person you’ve lost. I found myself looking at the back of his head a lot during the flight. It didn’t make me sad. Quite the opposite…it made me happy…made me feel a little comforted. It made me think Daddy was saying “hi” to me.

The flight was uneventful, and then we landed in Charlotte. As soon as we landed, the gentleman made a phone call. I don’t know if it was his wife or his daughter. I preferred to think it was his daughter, but it was probably his wife. I don’t know what had occurred, but he listened for a minute and then calmly responded with, “OK. You’re fine. Stop worrying about it. It’s over.” He had a calming voice, much like my daddy’s, and his southern accent sounded like Daddy’s too. He responded that way several times, “Let it go. It’s over.” I remember hearing my own dad say those very words to me many times in my life. When I was in college and I finished an exam that I thought didn’t go well, I would call him, and tell him. And he would always respond, very calmly, “Stop worrying about it. It’s over.” Or he might say, “Stop worrying about something you can’t change. It’s over now. You’re wasting your energy.” Even after a car accident, when I was trying to replay the events that led up to it, he would say, “Let it go. It’s over.” Seriously, hearing the gentleman on the phone last night really made me think of Daddy. If I had been worried about something at the time, I’d have thought Daddy was trying to send me a message. Maybe he was sending me a message about a future worry?

The gentleman ended his call with an “I love you,” and soon thereafter, we arrived at our gate. We all stood up to retrieve our carry-on bags from the overhead bins, and I found myself standing directly behind him while we waited to deplane. He and another gentleman started talking, and “the” gentleman revealed that he was traveling to Minneapolis. He said he had started his day in 87-degree weather, and when he arrived in Minneapolis, it would be 27 degrees. He also revealed that he enjoys traveling to Minneapolis and started talking about the food there. I don’t remember the particulars of everything he was saying about the food. I just remember that it reminded me of Daddy. When he traveled, he talked to people and learned about the city he visited. This gentleman was sharing little facts about the Swedish influence in Minneapolis, and he also revealed that everything he eats in Minneapolis is served with wild rice. Apparently, lots of wild rice is grown in the state of Minnesota…something I didn’t know before…and one of those facts Daddy would have picked up in his travels.

As weird as it sounds, I enjoyed the little bit of time that I felt like I was in the presence of my dad. I know it wasn’t Daddy. I’m not crazy. There’s just something a little reassuring about hearing a similar voice saying something Daddy would have said.

November is Pancreatic Cancer Awareness Month. If you’re familiar with pancreatic cancer because a family member or friend has it or had it, I’m sorry. It’s a terrible, deadly disease that gets very little research funding. If you’d like to make a donation to an organization that works to support those who have pancreatic cancer and their families, please consider donating to Pancreatic Cancer Action Network. Thursday, November 18, is World Pancreatic Cancer Day, and the organization will be hosting an online event, sharing the latest information on advances in research and treatment. You can see the Pancreatic Cancer Action Network website here. Please consider donating to this worthy cause.

And on November 18, please consider wearing purple in support of Pancreatic Cancer Awareness. I will wear purple in memory of my Daddy.

by Kelly Mattei

For the Love of Lamination

For the love of lamination.

Several years ago, my daughter was on a sports team at school, and the team mom told me she would laminate schedules for parents. She would laminate rosters. She would laminate everything…because she had a laminator at home, and she loved using it.

I thought she was being funny. But sure enough, soon thereafter, she showed up to a game with laminated schedule, laminated rosters…laminated anything and everything. She clearly loved her laminator.

I have been the team mom for several sports teams and never needed to laminate anything. But for whatever reason, this lacrosse season, the parents of the girls on our team wanted laminated rosters. I didn’t have a laminator. What to do? One mom recommended I go home, make the roster on my computer, and send it over to an office supply store to get them laminated. All I would have to do is pay online and pick them up when they were ready. Sounded easy enough! I went home and made the roster, but when I uploaded it to an office supply store site, I was a little surprised by the cost of the lamination. I didn’t really want to pay what they were asking. I checked other office supply companies and other printing companies, only to find the prices were all in line with each other.

Then, I remembered my friend, and I decided to look into the price of a laminator. Because I needed it in a hurry and didn’t want to traipse all over town looking for it, I looked for it online. Honestly, I was a little surprised to see they were pretty inexpensive. I placed an order for a home Scotch brand laminator and even got it delivered overnight for less than I would have paid to get our rosters laminated at a big box company.

The laminator arrived the next day, and I set it up on the cooktop in my kitchen. It was super easy. I had also ordered laminating pouches, so while the laminator heated up (it takes five minutes or so), I placed the rosters in the pouches, and by the time it was heated up, I was ready to get started. I fed each punch into the laminator, and within ten minutes, I was done. I had 30 laminated rosters for the parents of the girls on the lacrosse team.

And I was officially addicted to my laminator.

I searched around my house for things to laminate and ended up laminating some recipe cards that night before I unplugged the laminator, let it cool down, and put it away.

Since then, I have laminated our COVID-19 vaccine records for safe keeping. My husband thought I was crazy at first, but after it was done, he didn’t think I was crazy anymore. My daughter’s friends have brought their vaccination cards over, and I have laminated theirs.

Yes, I’m addicted. I’m no longer laughing at that team mom with the laminator addiction. In fact, I’ve put out a few emails to friends, inviting them to bring their vaccine cards, and I will laminate them while we have coffee or cocktails.

Maybe I should have a party?

***The laminator I purchased is the Scotch Thermal Laminator. There’s nothing fancy about it, but it gets the job done. Would I use it for big laminating jobs? No, but for getting 30 team rosters done in 10 minutes or less, I think it’s perfect. I ordered it from Amazon for $31.99. You can see it here.***

by Kelly Mattei

A Bluebird Takes Flight

A bluebird of happiness takes flight.

I just received word that a dear family friend passed away. When I say “dear family friend,” I mean someone who had basically been a member of my family since my parents first married in 1961. My mother met her when they were both working at a Sunland Center in Florida. Sounds luxurious, right? Well, Sunland was  actually a facility that specialized in offering services for the physically and mentally disabled…mostly children. My mother was a nurse there, and Cynthia, the family friend, worked in the recreation department. Cynthia was just 18 when they met, and while she admired Mother, I think Mother kind of took her under her wing. Mother was four years older, a registered nurse, and married. They became lifelong friends.

With encouragement from my mother, Cynthia later went to nursing school and then continued her education to become a nurse anesthetist…against the odds, since she was dyslexic. But she worked hard, and she was successful.

My parents moved to Alabama soon after I was born, and I remember Cynthia visiting regularly throughout my life. In fact, I thought she was my aunt till I was eight or nine. I have pictures of her visiting when I was a baby.  I know she was with us at a hotel in Panama City Beach in March 1970, when my toddler brother pulled a coffee pot off the table, burning himself. Mother and Daddy rushed him to the hospital, and Cynthia stayed with me. We watched people shooting fireworks off the balconies of the hotel…out over the beach. That’s likely one of my earliest memories, since I was not quite three years old. I’m sure it registered in my longterm memory because my brother’s burn was emotional for me.

Later, Cynthia had a little Triumph convertible. I thought she was the coolest, and I loved riding in that little car with her. She would visit us once or twice a year, and she was fun and energetic. She loved telling stories, and she loved to laugh. She had an infectious sense of humor with a twinkle in her eye, and she was always supportive of our little family. With no kids of her own, she treated us as if we were hers. Interestingly, somehow I remember that she was visiting us in Spanish Fort when I turned ten in 1977. She gave me a cool hooded shirt and shorts, and some Faberge Tigress cologne…what I thought was a grown-up gift! I loved it…the bottle was beautiful, with a fuzzy top that looked like a tiger skin. Funny what we remember.

And when Daddy was dying with pancreatic cancer, Cynthia was right there with us…helping us help him. I vividly remember her bathing mother’s dog and entertaining my daughter and my cousin’s daughter. The girls were two and three years old at the time, and Cynthia knew how to entertain them.

You might remember that I wrote about Cynthia once before, a couple of years ago when I wrote about the Bluebird of Happiness I found in my mother’s home after she died. I didn’t know where she got them, but I knew Cynthia often brought little gifts when she visited Mother, and I was right…when I called Cynthia, she said she had given them to her. I promptly packaged them up and sent them to Cynthia, and she later told me she kept them on a little table next to a picture of Mother. You can see the Bluebird of Happiness piece here. 

Last year, when I took my daughter and one of her friends on a road trip along the Gulf Coast, we visited Cynthia in Tallahassee. She took us to dinner at Shula’s atop the Hotel Duval, and we enjoyed the view of the Tallahassee skyline from the balcony. I had planned to see her again at Labor Day this year, when we visit Tallahassee again for a Florida State University football game.

While I’m brokenhearted…again…after a big loss, I know that if she were here with me right now, we would be laughing about something. She could make anything funny…with just a look.  In fact, last year, when we went to dinner, she kept my daughter in stitches with her crazy sense of humor. She told my daughter stories from my youth, and we laughed and laughed.

She loved my family as if we were her own, and the feeling was mutual, so this loss is a big one. It took the wind out of my sails. While I know loss is going to happen, this one was a shock. She was 76, but she was a young 76, if that makes any sense. She was a tough chick, and she is missed already.

Hug your loved ones, and if you can’t hug them because of this pandemic, talk with them as much as you can.

by Kelly Mattei

A Picture Tells a Story

A picture tells a story.

At the end of every year since I got an Instagram account, I go back through all the photos I posted for that year. Recently I went back through my Instagram photos for 2019, and I truly realized that some of the pictures really tell stories.

My first post for 2019 was a photo at the Charlotte airport…not much of a story except that we were starting vacation…meeting friends from Ohio in LA. But the next picture, a photo of me and my friend from Ohio, Jenn, tells a real story.

img_9558

Sure, looking at the photo above, all you see is two friends on a chilly day with the Pacific Ocean in the background. But what I see is love. Having just survived the first anniversary of my mother’s death (she died December 30, 2017), I was still reeling. I was feeling lost. And then we arrived in Los Angeles, and Jenn and her daughter arrived. After telling her what a terrible day that first anniversary on December 30 had been (there were additional factors at play)…and crying…Jenn made me feel better. Jenn, the perpetual ray of sunshine, hugged me, listened to me, and made me feel loved. So every time I come across that one single photo that looks completely nondescript and meaningless to everyone else in the world, I remember how much better she made me feel. I can look at my face in that picture and see the pain melting away. I see the relief in my eyes and in my face. That picture reminds me that good friends are hard to find. And that picture reminds me that when we find good friends like Jenn, we need to keep them.

There are other photos from 2019 that stand out for me. In fact, any photos I post on Instagram, I share for a reason…maybe I think they’re funny or cute…maybe I want to share something cool…or maybe there’s another meaning behind the picture. Of course, when I posted the picture of me and Jenn, I had no idea how powerful the picture was for me. It was only when I was looking through pictures a few months later that I saw it again, and the meaning behind it floored me. Instagram photos certainly tell stories…maybe not to the casual observer, but to the originator of the post. Most of my photos tell stories of family, friendship, and love. And then there are some that tell different stories…like this photo of me and my daughter in front of Mars Cheese Castle in Kenosha, Wisconsin.

The story? In 2015, I took a crazy road trip with my friend, Mary Ann, and our kids. We spent a few nights in Chicago, and while we were there, I had hoped to get the kids up to Wisconsin…just so they could add another state to their list of “states visited.” There was a Six Flags amusement park we could have visited just over the line, but that would have taken too much time, so instead, I suggested Mars Cheese Castle, a giant cheese store shaped like…you guessed it…a castle. We never made it in 2015, and I regretted it. So in 2019, when I was in Chicago with my daughter and one of her friends, we made a quick trip up to Kenosha to visit Mars Cheese Castle. You can see how happy I was!

Those are just a couple of examples of how pictures tell stories, but I can look at every picture on my Instagram account and remember stories and conversations behind them. Right now, though, I keep going back to that picture of me and Jenn. I need to call her and thank her for being a good friend.